were smart, and I know you are, you’ll walk away.” He spins on his heels and heads towards his office.
He is one-hundred percent right. I am smart and scared, but I need answers. “Talk to me, please. I don’t understand what you meant by…”
“Enough!” he screams, as his fists connect with the office door. Over and over again until they’re a bloody mess.
“Stop, Ryker! Please!” Immediately, I wrap my arms around his waist and press my face into the curve of his back. It doesn’t take long before the thin fabric of his shirt absorbs all of my remorseful tears. Every heartbeat and every breath he pulls into his lungs is a struggle for control. I’ve never seen him this angry. Ever. And I’ve never been so terrified in all my life, but I can’t walk away. Not now. Not when he’s in so much pain. With a shuddering breath, he surrenders. And his hands finally fall limply to his sides.
Chapter Fourteen
Ryker
I’m so fucking angry! But not at Lyra. I’m pissed at myself for caring. For giving a shit about what she thinks of me. Why should it matter? Damned if I know. Until I look down and see her arms wrapped around me and feel her tears branding my skin. And now I have my answer.
She... Makes... Me.... Feel.
Something I haven’t been able to do for quite some time now. In a matter of months, this woman has melted away my fortitude and the wall of ice I’ve twisted around my heart—the one that compelled me to be a cold, heartless bastard. I just pray she doesn’t leave me drowning in the aftermath. Because I could never live through that kind of pain. Ever again.
I spin her around and pull her in close to me. “Hush, precious. I’m fine.”
“I-I’m s-sorry. I shouldn’t have asked…” she whispers. She’s quiet for a moment and then quickly pulls away. “Let me see your hands.” They hurt like a motherfucker, but I only have myself to blame. When I place them in hers, she gasps. “I need to clean them, Ryker. Come into the bathroom.”
When Cody starts barking, I change direction so I can let her in. “I’ll get it. Meet me in the bathroom,” she commands.
There’s no point in arguing with her so I do what I’m told. And that’s a first for me. Usually, I’m the one in control. So I make a mental note to keep track, because this is so unlike me.
I’m standing in front of the sink, waiting, when she returns. “It’ll be easier if you sit down, Ryker.” With one hand on my chest she pushes me out of her way. I take the hint and sit down on the edge of the toilet as she grabs everything she needs. “This might hurt,” she whispers, and then begins washing the blood off of my hands. I concentrate on her and only her as she cleanses my knuckles with peroxide. It’s painful since they’re swollen and raw, but physical pain I can withstand. It’s the mental and emotional hurt that brings me to my knees. And after everything Cole revealed to me yesterday, how fucked up would it be for Lyra to be the one to forgive me.
My hands are throbbing by the time she finishes wrapping them up with gauze. They look ridiculous. Like something out of a horror flick. I’m preoccupied when Lyra tries to step away. Quickly, I fold her in my arms and rest my head against her chest. I can feel the thrumming beat of her heart as she cautiously rests her hands on my shoulders. She’s afraid of me. And that cuts me deeper than any knife ever could. So now I owe Lyra an explanation for my outburst.
“I used to drop Bella off at the studio when I went to work every morning. She was a ballerina for the New York City Ballet. At the time I worked undercover for a security firm. I was hired as Carlos Rodriguez’s bodyguard. Since he was a notorious drug dealer, it was my job to earn his trust so I could report my findings to my boss, Hawk. Who just so happened to be Bella’s father.” When she gasps I sneak a glance at her. She nods, so I continue. “When I dropped her off that morning
He is one-hundred percent right. I am smart and scared, but I need answers. “Talk to me, please. I don’t understand what you meant by…”
“Enough!” he screams, as his fists connect with the office door. Over and over again until they’re a bloody mess.
“Stop, Ryker! Please!” Immediately, I wrap my arms around his waist and press my face into the curve of his back. It doesn’t take long before the thin fabric of his shirt absorbs all of my remorseful tears. Every heartbeat and every breath he pulls into his lungs is a struggle for control. I’ve never seen him this angry. Ever. And I’ve never been so terrified in all my life, but I can’t walk away. Not now. Not when he’s in so much pain. With a shuddering breath, he surrenders. And his hands finally fall limply to his sides.
Chapter Fourteen
Ryker
I’m so fucking angry! But not at Lyra. I’m pissed at myself for caring. For giving a shit about what she thinks of me. Why should it matter? Damned if I know. Until I look down and see her arms wrapped around me and feel her tears branding my skin. And now I have my answer.
She... Makes... Me.... Feel.
Something I haven’t been able to do for quite some time now. In a matter of months, this woman has melted away my fortitude and the wall of ice I’ve twisted around my heart—the one that compelled me to be a cold, heartless bastard. I just pray she doesn’t leave me drowning in the aftermath. Because I could never live through that kind of pain. Ever again.
I spin her around and pull her in close to me. “Hush, precious. I’m fine.”
“I-I’m s-sorry. I shouldn’t have asked…” she whispers. She’s quiet for a moment and then quickly pulls away. “Let me see your hands.” They hurt like a motherfucker, but I only have myself to blame. When I place them in hers, she gasps. “I need to clean them, Ryker. Come into the bathroom.”
When Cody starts barking, I change direction so I can let her in. “I’ll get it. Meet me in the bathroom,” she commands.
There’s no point in arguing with her so I do what I’m told. And that’s a first for me. Usually, I’m the one in control. So I make a mental note to keep track, because this is so unlike me.
I’m standing in front of the sink, waiting, when she returns. “It’ll be easier if you sit down, Ryker.” With one hand on my chest she pushes me out of her way. I take the hint and sit down on the edge of the toilet as she grabs everything she needs. “This might hurt,” she whispers, and then begins washing the blood off of my hands. I concentrate on her and only her as she cleanses my knuckles with peroxide. It’s painful since they’re swollen and raw, but physical pain I can withstand. It’s the mental and emotional hurt that brings me to my knees. And after everything Cole revealed to me yesterday, how fucked up would it be for Lyra to be the one to forgive me.
My hands are throbbing by the time she finishes wrapping them up with gauze. They look ridiculous. Like something out of a horror flick. I’m preoccupied when Lyra tries to step away. Quickly, I fold her in my arms and rest my head against her chest. I can feel the thrumming beat of her heart as she cautiously rests her hands on my shoulders. She’s afraid of me. And that cuts me deeper than any knife ever could. So now I owe Lyra an explanation for my outburst.
“I used to drop Bella off at the studio when I went to work every morning. She was a ballerina for the New York City Ballet. At the time I worked undercover for a security firm. I was hired as Carlos Rodriguez’s bodyguard. Since he was a notorious drug dealer, it was my job to earn his trust so I could report my findings to my boss, Hawk. Who just so happened to be Bella’s father.” When she gasps I sneak a glance at her. She nods, so I continue. “When I dropped her off that morning
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