to this arrangement and by 8 PM that night, he’d been back three times with more flowers, teddy bears, chocolates and balloons, each with a version of ‘I’m sorry’ in the note. The delivery guy said, “He must be really sorry.”
I thought, he’s sorry alright. By 9 PM, there was another knock on the door, but when I looked it was Trevor.
“What’s up Trevor?” I asked as I opened the door.
“Nothing, I should be asking you the same question. At first I thought something happened to you and people were having a memorial, then I thought maybe there was a funeral, then I read one of the cards and realized your ‘colleague’ must have fucked up, royally.”
I laughed, “You read my card.”
“Damn straight I read your card, the entire 3 rd floor has.”
“The entire third floor is nosy,” I said out loud.
“Yeah, we are, but when you leave stuff outside your door, this is what you get, so as your official male/neighbor/fellow avocado loving friend – I brought something to cheer you up,” he said, while taking the liberty to walk in my apartment.
“Okay, what might that be?”
“Ice cream of course!”
“Uh, what kind?”
“Ben & Jerry’s of course!” he said excitedly.
“What kind?”
“What kind do you like?”
“Chocolate Fudge Brownie.”
“Our list just keeps growing and growing,” he said as he pulled out two individual pints of Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream.
“Wow,” I said impressed.
“Well, I bought every kind they had, but since I like Chocolate Fudge Brownie, I figured if you wanted it, I’d have my own.” He smiled.
“Smart man,” I said and went to retrieve spoons and put the rest of the ice-cream in the freezer.
Trevor sat on the loveseat right next to me and asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Normally, I’d say no, because I don’t. However, there was something that you said the other day about my guy friend, so I asked him and you were right. So, I’m inclined to get your advice here, but I’m still busy being pissed.”
“Okay, well, I like a challenge. I promise to give you unbiased advice, as I’d rather have you as a friend if nothing else.” He smiled.
“Hmm, okay.”
I told him the whole story, from beginning to end, including the herpes conversation, minus the intimate words and deeds that were shared, he gleaned that from the rest of the story. He ate his ice cream, while thoughtfully listening.
“Well,” he looked up and said, “I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this, but I think your friend Elliot is right. This guy Joshua is under your skin and you are under his and neither of you are handling this the right way.”
“Damn, I forgot you were the psych minor.” I rolled my eyes.
He laughed, and continued, “He is definitely an alpha, something you aren’t used to, because you’ve had to be the alpha in your life. You buck up against him, which probably drives him crazy, you know this, and keep doing it, it’s no wonder he hasn’t turned you over his knee and spanked your ass yet.”
“You sound like him.” My eyes widen.
“Babe, you have no idea. I’d love it if you were my woman and you got out of line, a good spanking ain’t never hurt nobody.” He shook his head. “I digress.”
“Good Lord.” I looked up at the ceiling.
“Anyway, you guys should talk, because I’m sure this can be explained away, because he’s used to doing things and people acquiescing to him without question, thought or comment. That didn’t work for you, because you guys haven’t really developed a trust of each other to know what the other needs, how each other responds and what is needed for you to feel safe with one another.”
He ate some more ice cream, then swallowed. “The relationship hasn’t even begun yet, really, but he’s had feelings for a year now and you are just coming around to seeing him as potential. He’s way ahead of you as far as progression goes, so you’re looking at it like
I thought, he’s sorry alright. By 9 PM, there was another knock on the door, but when I looked it was Trevor.
“What’s up Trevor?” I asked as I opened the door.
“Nothing, I should be asking you the same question. At first I thought something happened to you and people were having a memorial, then I thought maybe there was a funeral, then I read one of the cards and realized your ‘colleague’ must have fucked up, royally.”
I laughed, “You read my card.”
“Damn straight I read your card, the entire 3 rd floor has.”
“The entire third floor is nosy,” I said out loud.
“Yeah, we are, but when you leave stuff outside your door, this is what you get, so as your official male/neighbor/fellow avocado loving friend – I brought something to cheer you up,” he said, while taking the liberty to walk in my apartment.
“Okay, what might that be?”
“Ice cream of course!”
“Uh, what kind?”
“Ben & Jerry’s of course!” he said excitedly.
“What kind?”
“What kind do you like?”
“Chocolate Fudge Brownie.”
“Our list just keeps growing and growing,” he said as he pulled out two individual pints of Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream.
“Wow,” I said impressed.
“Well, I bought every kind they had, but since I like Chocolate Fudge Brownie, I figured if you wanted it, I’d have my own.” He smiled.
“Smart man,” I said and went to retrieve spoons and put the rest of the ice-cream in the freezer.
Trevor sat on the loveseat right next to me and asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Normally, I’d say no, because I don’t. However, there was something that you said the other day about my guy friend, so I asked him and you were right. So, I’m inclined to get your advice here, but I’m still busy being pissed.”
“Okay, well, I like a challenge. I promise to give you unbiased advice, as I’d rather have you as a friend if nothing else.” He smiled.
“Hmm, okay.”
I told him the whole story, from beginning to end, including the herpes conversation, minus the intimate words and deeds that were shared, he gleaned that from the rest of the story. He ate his ice cream, while thoughtfully listening.
“Well,” he looked up and said, “I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this, but I think your friend Elliot is right. This guy Joshua is under your skin and you are under his and neither of you are handling this the right way.”
“Damn, I forgot you were the psych minor.” I rolled my eyes.
He laughed, and continued, “He is definitely an alpha, something you aren’t used to, because you’ve had to be the alpha in your life. You buck up against him, which probably drives him crazy, you know this, and keep doing it, it’s no wonder he hasn’t turned you over his knee and spanked your ass yet.”
“You sound like him.” My eyes widen.
“Babe, you have no idea. I’d love it if you were my woman and you got out of line, a good spanking ain’t never hurt nobody.” He shook his head. “I digress.”
“Good Lord.” I looked up at the ceiling.
“Anyway, you guys should talk, because I’m sure this can be explained away, because he’s used to doing things and people acquiescing to him without question, thought or comment. That didn’t work for you, because you guys haven’t really developed a trust of each other to know what the other needs, how each other responds and what is needed for you to feel safe with one another.”
He ate some more ice cream, then swallowed. “The relationship hasn’t even begun yet, really, but he’s had feelings for a year now and you are just coming around to seeing him as potential. He’s way ahead of you as far as progression goes, so you’re looking at it like
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