he spat out. “Your
mother and I were ‘in it’ the moment you were born. In it a second
time when Ashley was born! Maybe sheltering at home is okay for the
moment, but at the first sign of trouble you get your asses here!
Got it!”
“Dad, I don’t want Mom getting hurt!” I
objected.
“Listen to me, mister! Your mother has dealt
with death threats, drug gangs and PTA. We already talked about it
and she knows all about this, so you just get that line of crap
outta your head. We’re your parents….would you let Ashley deal with
this all on her own even if she was grown up? I don’t think
so!”
I hadn’t thought about it that way. If Ashley
was grown and in danger I would do everything in my power, spend
everything I had including my life, to help protect her. Mom and
Dad felt the same way about me. I suddenly felt like Sarah was
looking over my shoulder. It happens pretty regularly, at least
weekly since she died. I’m facing a problem or decision and
suddenly feel like she’s there, watching. Then I immediately try to
think how she would handle it or what her input would be. The
answers come quickly, not from anything supernatural, but just from
my own knowledge of my wife.
The answer came just as quickly this time. To
protect my daughter I should use everything and everyone I had
to.
Chapter 10
Ashley poked her head into the man space
about then and informed us that lunch was ready, giving us each a
questioning look. My daughter is observant and I could tell she had
picked up on my behavior as well as our body language. The look in
her eyes told me that we would be having a conversation in the car
on the way home and I had better come clean. Ashley and I have a
policy, one we created while rebuilding our lives after Sarah died.
We don’t keep important things from each other, no secrets.
Lunch was chicken salad sandwiches, chips,
pickles and homemade vegetable soup. Mom kept up a steady chatter
as we ate, while I mostly thought about what I would say in the
car.
“Ian, Ash tells me you met a young lady
today?” Mom suddenly threw my way.
I almost spit my diet soda all over the
table.
“Eirwen?” I looked at Ashley who was
grinning.
“Come on Dad, she’s gorgeous!”
“Yes, Ash, she’s a gorgeous twenty-something year old . Way, way too young for me,” I
answered, giving her a WTF look.
“Well, it’s just that I got a serious vibe
off her, you know, that’s she was very interested in you,” she
replied.
That absolutely couldn’t be right, we were
worlds apart in age and background. I was dumbfounded that Ashley
had even thought that way at all. I had my hands full with raising
her and trying to eke out a living, save something for her college
and rebuild our lives. Women were nowhere on my horizon.
“Yeah, not so much. She might like
some of the younger guys at the MMA dojo, but I’m afraid your radar
is off this time.”
My mom looked at me speculatively for a
moment then changed the subject, asking Ashley about her final
soccer game, which my parents had missed.
The rest of lunch dragged a little, slowed by
the invisible tension of the crazy, ridiculous danger hanging over
our heads. My father and I exchanged numerous glances, some of
which mom noticed, although Ashley didn’t appear to see any of it.
My brain kept slipping gears, leaving the conversation to think
about piranha toothed fairies, killer goblins and homicidal elves,
always returning to the central question….what was there about
Ashley that could draw them?
We finally finished up and got ready to
leave, a process made more difficult by my mother’s suddenly
obvious anxiety and overly affectionate hugging.
My father came up to me while I was putting
the box of booby traps and cameras in the back of the Toyota, his
arms full of butcher paper.
“Here, this is a bunch of meat from the
bottom of the chest freezer, stuff we just haven’t gotten to in the
last year or so. It should be fine
mother and I were ‘in it’ the moment you were born. In it a second
time when Ashley was born! Maybe sheltering at home is okay for the
moment, but at the first sign of trouble you get your asses here!
Got it!”
“Dad, I don’t want Mom getting hurt!” I
objected.
“Listen to me, mister! Your mother has dealt
with death threats, drug gangs and PTA. We already talked about it
and she knows all about this, so you just get that line of crap
outta your head. We’re your parents….would you let Ashley deal with
this all on her own even if she was grown up? I don’t think
so!”
I hadn’t thought about it that way. If Ashley
was grown and in danger I would do everything in my power, spend
everything I had including my life, to help protect her. Mom and
Dad felt the same way about me. I suddenly felt like Sarah was
looking over my shoulder. It happens pretty regularly, at least
weekly since she died. I’m facing a problem or decision and
suddenly feel like she’s there, watching. Then I immediately try to
think how she would handle it or what her input would be. The
answers come quickly, not from anything supernatural, but just from
my own knowledge of my wife.
The answer came just as quickly this time. To
protect my daughter I should use everything and everyone I had
to.
Chapter 10
Ashley poked her head into the man space
about then and informed us that lunch was ready, giving us each a
questioning look. My daughter is observant and I could tell she had
picked up on my behavior as well as our body language. The look in
her eyes told me that we would be having a conversation in the car
on the way home and I had better come clean. Ashley and I have a
policy, one we created while rebuilding our lives after Sarah died.
We don’t keep important things from each other, no secrets.
Lunch was chicken salad sandwiches, chips,
pickles and homemade vegetable soup. Mom kept up a steady chatter
as we ate, while I mostly thought about what I would say in the
car.
“Ian, Ash tells me you met a young lady
today?” Mom suddenly threw my way.
I almost spit my diet soda all over the
table.
“Eirwen?” I looked at Ashley who was
grinning.
“Come on Dad, she’s gorgeous!”
“Yes, Ash, she’s a gorgeous twenty-something year old . Way, way too young for me,” I
answered, giving her a WTF look.
“Well, it’s just that I got a serious vibe
off her, you know, that’s she was very interested in you,” she
replied.
That absolutely couldn’t be right, we were
worlds apart in age and background. I was dumbfounded that Ashley
had even thought that way at all. I had my hands full with raising
her and trying to eke out a living, save something for her college
and rebuild our lives. Women were nowhere on my horizon.
“Yeah, not so much. She might like
some of the younger guys at the MMA dojo, but I’m afraid your radar
is off this time.”
My mom looked at me speculatively for a
moment then changed the subject, asking Ashley about her final
soccer game, which my parents had missed.
The rest of lunch dragged a little, slowed by
the invisible tension of the crazy, ridiculous danger hanging over
our heads. My father and I exchanged numerous glances, some of
which mom noticed, although Ashley didn’t appear to see any of it.
My brain kept slipping gears, leaving the conversation to think
about piranha toothed fairies, killer goblins and homicidal elves,
always returning to the central question….what was there about
Ashley that could draw them?
We finally finished up and got ready to
leave, a process made more difficult by my mother’s suddenly
obvious anxiety and overly affectionate hugging.
My father came up to me while I was putting
the box of booby traps and cameras in the back of the Toyota, his
arms full of butcher paper.
“Here, this is a bunch of meat from the
bottom of the chest freezer, stuff we just haven’t gotten to in the
last year or so. It should be fine
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