cut himself off with a
jerk of his head. He looked away, breathing rapidly, his face slightly flushed
with his annoyance.
Zoe
was deeply upset by his reaction. She'd thought she looked really good. She’d
been excited about feeling pretty and sexy again, and he was acting like she
was a naughty preteen trying to dress up like a grown-up.
Her
voice was slightly hushed when she spoke again. Although Logan probably
couldn’t understand anything they said, she still didn’t want him to hear. “I’m
allowed to act and dress like a normal woman.”
Adam
swallowed so hard she saw it in his throat. He still wasn’t looking at her. “I
know you are.”
“Sometimes
I feel like I’m…like I’m betraying him every time I try to start my life again,
but I have to. I have to.”
“I
know you do.” His voice was still thick and hoarse, but it didn’t sound angry
anymore. “I didn’t mean to imply you shouldn’t.”
“It’s
not like I’m going to pick up some guy at a club. I just want to look…look
good.”
“You
do look good.”
He
wasn’t even looking at her, so she wasn’t sure whether she should believe him
or not. But at least he wasn’t acting so disapproving anymore.
She
supposed it made sense. Seeing her move on with her life couldn’t be easy for Adam.
Josh had been his family, and it would be hard for him to give up the idea that
she belonged to Josh. But, if they were going to be friends, he would have to
get over that.
“Okay,”
she said, a little awkwardly, still having to intentionally restrain herself
from buttoning the cardigan again. “I’m going to take off. I’ll probably be
back before midnight. Just call if you have any problems.”
“I
will. We’ll be fine.” He sounded almost natural again, but there was a
lingering tension in his neck and shoulders, and he wasn’t looking at her
directly.
Zoe
shrugged it off, deciding there was nothing she could do about Adam’s reaction
right now. She leaned over to kiss Logan and told him to be good. Logan,
finished with his green beans, demanded more to eat.
“How
about some…” Adam paused as he studied the cut-up meat in the bowl Zoe had prepared.
Then concluded, “…chicken?”
Logan
reached out for his food, and Zoe decided it was a good time for her to leave.
She squeezed Adam on the shoulder as another silent thank you, kissed Logan
again, and slipped out.
She
met up with Jane and her other friends, and they went to a trendy fusion
restaurant for dinner.
Zoe
had found a part-time assistant manager job at a downtown boutique. She loved
the clothes, and the hours were good. It wasn’t a very high paying or impressive
position. Zoe, however, didn’t need to earn an income. Josh had left her and
Logan well provided for. What she needed was something in which to invest her
time and energy. She loved retail work, and the idea of the job made her feel
more like herself again.
It
was exciting. Felt like a new challenge. A fresh start.
A
bittersweet one, since she’d never be able to share it with Josh.
It
had been over seven months now since he’d died, though, and she couldn’t put
her life on hold forever.
So
she had a good time celebrating with her friends. They drank two bottles of
wine at dinner. Then they couldn’t agree on which club to go to afterwards. So
they ended up stopping in at three different bars or clubs, and Zoe had mixed
drinks at each one.
By
midnight, she was giddy and rather fuzzy. Everything seemed funnier than it
should, and—despite a firm belief that she was no longer someone who would do
such a thing—she danced quite uninhibitedly with her friends at the last club
they visited.
The
alcohol had somehow snuck up on her. She’d had no intention of drinking very
much, and she wasn’t really conscious of having done so. Her friends weren’t going
to let her do anything crazy or dangerous, and they would get a cab to take
them home.
So
Zoe just enjoyed letting go for the evening,
jerk of his head. He looked away, breathing rapidly, his face slightly flushed
with his annoyance.
Zoe
was deeply upset by his reaction. She'd thought she looked really good. She’d
been excited about feeling pretty and sexy again, and he was acting like she
was a naughty preteen trying to dress up like a grown-up.
Her
voice was slightly hushed when she spoke again. Although Logan probably
couldn’t understand anything they said, she still didn’t want him to hear. “I’m
allowed to act and dress like a normal woman.”
Adam
swallowed so hard she saw it in his throat. He still wasn’t looking at her. “I
know you are.”
“Sometimes
I feel like I’m…like I’m betraying him every time I try to start my life again,
but I have to. I have to.”
“I
know you do.” His voice was still thick and hoarse, but it didn’t sound angry
anymore. “I didn’t mean to imply you shouldn’t.”
“It’s
not like I’m going to pick up some guy at a club. I just want to look…look
good.”
“You
do look good.”
He
wasn’t even looking at her, so she wasn’t sure whether she should believe him
or not. But at least he wasn’t acting so disapproving anymore.
She
supposed it made sense. Seeing her move on with her life couldn’t be easy for Adam.
Josh had been his family, and it would be hard for him to give up the idea that
she belonged to Josh. But, if they were going to be friends, he would have to
get over that.
“Okay,”
she said, a little awkwardly, still having to intentionally restrain herself
from buttoning the cardigan again. “I’m going to take off. I’ll probably be
back before midnight. Just call if you have any problems.”
“I
will. We’ll be fine.” He sounded almost natural again, but there was a
lingering tension in his neck and shoulders, and he wasn’t looking at her
directly.
Zoe
shrugged it off, deciding there was nothing she could do about Adam’s reaction
right now. She leaned over to kiss Logan and told him to be good. Logan,
finished with his green beans, demanded more to eat.
“How
about some…” Adam paused as he studied the cut-up meat in the bowl Zoe had prepared.
Then concluded, “…chicken?”
Logan
reached out for his food, and Zoe decided it was a good time for her to leave.
She squeezed Adam on the shoulder as another silent thank you, kissed Logan
again, and slipped out.
She
met up with Jane and her other friends, and they went to a trendy fusion
restaurant for dinner.
Zoe
had found a part-time assistant manager job at a downtown boutique. She loved
the clothes, and the hours were good. It wasn’t a very high paying or impressive
position. Zoe, however, didn’t need to earn an income. Josh had left her and
Logan well provided for. What she needed was something in which to invest her
time and energy. She loved retail work, and the idea of the job made her feel
more like herself again.
It
was exciting. Felt like a new challenge. A fresh start.
A
bittersweet one, since she’d never be able to share it with Josh.
It
had been over seven months now since he’d died, though, and she couldn’t put
her life on hold forever.
So
she had a good time celebrating with her friends. They drank two bottles of
wine at dinner. Then they couldn’t agree on which club to go to afterwards. So
they ended up stopping in at three different bars or clubs, and Zoe had mixed
drinks at each one.
By
midnight, she was giddy and rather fuzzy. Everything seemed funnier than it
should, and—despite a firm belief that she was no longer someone who would do
such a thing—she danced quite uninhibitedly with her friends at the last club
they visited.
The
alcohol had somehow snuck up on her. She’d had no intention of drinking very
much, and she wasn’t really conscious of having done so. Her friends weren’t going
to let her do anything crazy or dangerous, and they would get a cab to take
them home.
So
Zoe just enjoyed letting go for the evening,
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