tenderness. And that scared me a hell of lot more than the passion from just moments before.
“Not even with Olivia?” I cringed internally, hating myself for bringing her name into this. But I needed to. It had to be dealt with. Jordan needed to be reminded that what we were doing was behind his girlfriend's back. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against mine. Our noses rubbed against each other and I didn't have the strength to move away from him. He held me captive.
“Yes. Even with Olivia. Maysie, I have a girlfriend. A girlfriend I've been with for three goddamn years.” I felt tears burn my eyes as the nasty reality of the situation I found myself in washed over me. Because hell if I wasn't falling for him. And falling hard.
Jordan opened his eyes and looked at me as he grabbed my face between his hands and held me perfectly still, not letting me move. “But tell me, Mays, why is it that all I can fucking think about is you? Why am I so eager to take another guy's head off for touching you? Why is it when I lay in bed at night I wish it was you there beside me?” he demanded almost angrily, his words causing my heart to skip a beat. His fierce expression then relaxed into that beautiful tenderness again.
“Come home with me tonight. Please. Let's figure all this out...together,” Jordan pleaded, his hands sliding down my face until they rested on either side of my neck. They felt so warm, so natural there. Slowly, he leaned in to kiss me again.
God I wanted to go home with him. I wanted to forget that there even was an Olivia. But there was an Olivia. And she would be home in a week. And he would go back to her. And I would become a shameful, dirty secret to be forgotten. Jordan would most likely feel guilty and what if he told Olivia about me? Where would that leave me?
I would lose my sorority, my new friends, the life I had created for myself at Rinard. I was pretty damn sure that I was just a passing fling to Jordan Levitt. A flash in the pan. I was also pretty damn sure that he didn't feel the same depth of emotion for me that I was starting to feel for him. Sure he was attracted to me. We had this undeniable physical chemistry. Chemistry that was impossible to ignore. But that didn't equate to anything resembling love. And I think I wanted that. No, I knew I wanted that. And that frightened me. A lot.
I also knew, without a doubt, that he would crush my heart. Destroying my soul, my will, my entire being. And I couldn't let that happen.
So I finally forced myself to push him away. Jordan looked hurt as I shoved his chest with my hands. “No, Jordan. I won't go home with you. I won't go anywhere with you. This can never happen again,” I told him firmly, feeling our separation like a physical ache. A new emptiness. A hollow sense of loss for what could never be.
The fire in Jordan's eyes dimmed until it was as though it had never existed at all. “But I thought...” Jordan started, trying to reach for me again. I held up my hand to stop him.
“I don't care what you thought. This thing going on between you and me ends here, tonight. You are not going to do this to Olivia. I know you love her.” Swallowing hard as the words got stuck in my throat. I felt sick.
Jordan shook his head. “I don't know how I feel about Olivia anymore. But, Maysie. I do know that what I feel for you is real. And it's not something I can ignore,” he implored, his eyes desperate. I felt myself weaken but then I stiffened my spine and went in for the kill.
“It'll pass. Now, I've got to get back to Eli. He's probably wondering where I am.” Jordan's eyes went hard as he let me edge around passed him.
My lips were tender and swollen from kissing him and I hoped Eli wouldn't notice. I wanted Jordan to try and stop me
“Not even with Olivia?” I cringed internally, hating myself for bringing her name into this. But I needed to. It had to be dealt with. Jordan needed to be reminded that what we were doing was behind his girlfriend's back. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against mine. Our noses rubbed against each other and I didn't have the strength to move away from him. He held me captive.
“Yes. Even with Olivia. Maysie, I have a girlfriend. A girlfriend I've been with for three goddamn years.” I felt tears burn my eyes as the nasty reality of the situation I found myself in washed over me. Because hell if I wasn't falling for him. And falling hard.
Jordan opened his eyes and looked at me as he grabbed my face between his hands and held me perfectly still, not letting me move. “But tell me, Mays, why is it that all I can fucking think about is you? Why am I so eager to take another guy's head off for touching you? Why is it when I lay in bed at night I wish it was you there beside me?” he demanded almost angrily, his words causing my heart to skip a beat. His fierce expression then relaxed into that beautiful tenderness again.
“Come home with me tonight. Please. Let's figure all this out...together,” Jordan pleaded, his hands sliding down my face until they rested on either side of my neck. They felt so warm, so natural there. Slowly, he leaned in to kiss me again.
God I wanted to go home with him. I wanted to forget that there even was an Olivia. But there was an Olivia. And she would be home in a week. And he would go back to her. And I would become a shameful, dirty secret to be forgotten. Jordan would most likely feel guilty and what if he told Olivia about me? Where would that leave me?
I would lose my sorority, my new friends, the life I had created for myself at Rinard. I was pretty damn sure that I was just a passing fling to Jordan Levitt. A flash in the pan. I was also pretty damn sure that he didn't feel the same depth of emotion for me that I was starting to feel for him. Sure he was attracted to me. We had this undeniable physical chemistry. Chemistry that was impossible to ignore. But that didn't equate to anything resembling love. And I think I wanted that. No, I knew I wanted that. And that frightened me. A lot.
I also knew, without a doubt, that he would crush my heart. Destroying my soul, my will, my entire being. And I couldn't let that happen.
So I finally forced myself to push him away. Jordan looked hurt as I shoved his chest with my hands. “No, Jordan. I won't go home with you. I won't go anywhere with you. This can never happen again,” I told him firmly, feeling our separation like a physical ache. A new emptiness. A hollow sense of loss for what could never be.
The fire in Jordan's eyes dimmed until it was as though it had never existed at all. “But I thought...” Jordan started, trying to reach for me again. I held up my hand to stop him.
“I don't care what you thought. This thing going on between you and me ends here, tonight. You are not going to do this to Olivia. I know you love her.” Swallowing hard as the words got stuck in my throat. I felt sick.
Jordan shook his head. “I don't know how I feel about Olivia anymore. But, Maysie. I do know that what I feel for you is real. And it's not something I can ignore,” he implored, his eyes desperate. I felt myself weaken but then I stiffened my spine and went in for the kill.
“It'll pass. Now, I've got to get back to Eli. He's probably wondering where I am.” Jordan's eyes went hard as he let me edge around passed him.
My lips were tender and swollen from kissing him and I hoped Eli wouldn't notice. I wanted Jordan to try and stop me
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