mom seemed a little frazzled. The last thing she needed was for
some asshole to be hassling her like that. The waitress came over with some
crayons and paper for him to play with and that’s the only time he let go of my
neck. I sat him on the seat between me and Jacqueline so he could color and
when the young lady came back to take our orders I ordered his Mac and cheese.
“Sir we don’t serve
that after four pm I already told his mom…”
“Do you or do you not have Mac and cheese back there?”
“Well no it’s made fresh every morning.
“You’ve got macaroni salad on the dinner menu
which means you’ve got noodles, you have cheeseburgers on there too there’s
your cheese. Tell the chef to heat up some pasta and melt some cheese it can’t
be that hard.”
“But sir…
“If you tell me about that four o’clock thing
again I’m gonna lose my shit. That’s a human being, that’s a manmade device
that keeps track of time. This kid has to go to bed hungry because that says
so?”
She thought it over and came to the right
conclusion, which was good for her and all concerned because I was seriously
contemplating going back there and doing the shit myself.
“I’ll get him his Mac and cheese even if I have
to do it myself. It might take a minute…”
“We’ll wait.” Andrew was busy painting away, I
guess he thought he was Picasso or some shit. He was handing out drawings to
all the women the little shit, and flirting with my wife.
Dinner turned out
okay Andrew ate his dinner and seemed happy enough. There were no more outbursts
because he’d got what the fuck he wanted. I don’t see what was the big fucking
deal? I’m a grown man and sometimes I want to throw a howling fit. In fact if
you asked my team they’d tell you I do that shit on occasion.
“You know that thing
I was worried about earlier?” Jacqueline leaned over Andrew’s head to whisper.
“Yeah?”
“I’m not worried anymore.”
“Good girl.”
Chapter 18
Jake
After dinner and it
was time to go the women acted like they were long lost friends. Linda, the young
mother spent a good five minutes trying to pay me back for her portion but I
didn’t even acknowledge that shit. She finally gave up when my wife and mother
told her it was a lost cause. As we left the restaurant Jacqueline was stuck to
my side while mom and Mindy walked behind with Linda and Andrew who was talking
a mile a minute.
“Can you believe her
husband left her because Andrew wasn’t born perfect?” I kissed her head softly
because her voice was so sad. After living with asshole number one she still
didn’t get it. “Babe everything with a dick ain’t a man. No man would leave his
family no matter what. In the long run they’ll be better off without the fuck.”
She wasn’t done yet because she was twitchier than a cat on a cross wire.
Whatever it was I’ll put her mind at ease however I could before she worried
herself to death. My woman sure likes to worry about shit.
“But I feel so bad
for them, she came all the way from New York and she has no family here, no one
it’s just so unfair.”
“You learned all that in the last hour and
fifteen minutes?” What the fuck is up with women anyway? It’s like they meet
each other and shit just starts spilling out.
“Well yeah, what’s wrong with that? Anyway I
think it’s awful that she has to go through this and she has no way of getting
back to her family, she’s ashamed…”
“Where does she live?” She rattled off an
address here in town, it wasn’t the worst but it wasn’t the best either. “I
know where that it we’ll follow them home.” She squeezed my arm and laid her
head on my shoulder for which she got another kiss to her head just because.
Linda once more
tried to protest when I said we were going to follow behind and make sure they
got home safe. The women had already exchanged numbers so I didn’t have to. I
strapped Andrew into his car seat while he
some asshole to be hassling her like that. The waitress came over with some
crayons and paper for him to play with and that’s the only time he let go of my
neck. I sat him on the seat between me and Jacqueline so he could color and
when the young lady came back to take our orders I ordered his Mac and cheese.
“Sir we don’t serve
that after four pm I already told his mom…”
“Do you or do you not have Mac and cheese back there?”
“Well no it’s made fresh every morning.
“You’ve got macaroni salad on the dinner menu
which means you’ve got noodles, you have cheeseburgers on there too there’s
your cheese. Tell the chef to heat up some pasta and melt some cheese it can’t
be that hard.”
“But sir…
“If you tell me about that four o’clock thing
again I’m gonna lose my shit. That’s a human being, that’s a manmade device
that keeps track of time. This kid has to go to bed hungry because that says
so?”
She thought it over and came to the right
conclusion, which was good for her and all concerned because I was seriously
contemplating going back there and doing the shit myself.
“I’ll get him his Mac and cheese even if I have
to do it myself. It might take a minute…”
“We’ll wait.” Andrew was busy painting away, I
guess he thought he was Picasso or some shit. He was handing out drawings to
all the women the little shit, and flirting with my wife.
Dinner turned out
okay Andrew ate his dinner and seemed happy enough. There were no more outbursts
because he’d got what the fuck he wanted. I don’t see what was the big fucking
deal? I’m a grown man and sometimes I want to throw a howling fit. In fact if
you asked my team they’d tell you I do that shit on occasion.
“You know that thing
I was worried about earlier?” Jacqueline leaned over Andrew’s head to whisper.
“Yeah?”
“I’m not worried anymore.”
“Good girl.”
Chapter 18
Jake
After dinner and it
was time to go the women acted like they were long lost friends. Linda, the young
mother spent a good five minutes trying to pay me back for her portion but I
didn’t even acknowledge that shit. She finally gave up when my wife and mother
told her it was a lost cause. As we left the restaurant Jacqueline was stuck to
my side while mom and Mindy walked behind with Linda and Andrew who was talking
a mile a minute.
“Can you believe her
husband left her because Andrew wasn’t born perfect?” I kissed her head softly
because her voice was so sad. After living with asshole number one she still
didn’t get it. “Babe everything with a dick ain’t a man. No man would leave his
family no matter what. In the long run they’ll be better off without the fuck.”
She wasn’t done yet because she was twitchier than a cat on a cross wire.
Whatever it was I’ll put her mind at ease however I could before she worried
herself to death. My woman sure likes to worry about shit.
“But I feel so bad
for them, she came all the way from New York and she has no family here, no one
it’s just so unfair.”
“You learned all that in the last hour and
fifteen minutes?” What the fuck is up with women anyway? It’s like they meet
each other and shit just starts spilling out.
“Well yeah, what’s wrong with that? Anyway I
think it’s awful that she has to go through this and she has no way of getting
back to her family, she’s ashamed…”
“Where does she live?” She rattled off an
address here in town, it wasn’t the worst but it wasn’t the best either. “I
know where that it we’ll follow them home.” She squeezed my arm and laid her
head on my shoulder for which she got another kiss to her head just because.
Linda once more
tried to protest when I said we were going to follow behind and make sure they
got home safe. The women had already exchanged numbers so I didn’t have to. I
strapped Andrew into his car seat while he
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