Backward by Andrew Grey

wrong and he should have just pursued him the way he had other people, but that didn’t seem right. “Come on.”
    “What about Butterscotch?” Tristan asked, his eyes widening slightly.
    “I’ll close the door. Butterscotch has places she likes to sleep all over the house. She’ll be just fine.” He wasn’t going to give Tristan something else to worry about. “Come with me.” Harry took his hand and led him back across the hall and into his bedroom. Harry closed the door and sat on the edge of the bed. He tugged Tristan between his legs and held him tight, resting his head against Tristan’s chest, listening to the beat of his heart.
    He was getting very rattled as his willpower began to fade. He wanted nothing more than to tug off Tristan’s clothes, pull him down onto the bed, and make love to him for hours. But they had only really known each other in a serious way for a few days. That was too fast. He kept reminding himself of that and backed away. He tugged off his shirt, and Tristan stepped away and began undressing as well. He turned out the light, and after stripping to his boxer shorts, pulled back the covers and got in bed. Then he waited and watched Tristan’s figure as he walked around the bed and got in the other side.
    “You do know that I’m not some innocent virgin you have to take your time with. I know what sex is, and I’ve had it before… I like it,” Tristan said.
    “I know. Me too. But in the past I’ve always rushed in or just been in it for the sex. I need to take my time.”
    Tristan chuckled and settled next to him. Harry lay on his back, looking up at the ceiling, and Tristan scooted close and put his hand on Harry’s chest. “Maybe a little. I may have rushed into sex too early too. Eddie was attractive and forceful. I liked that, but I may have jumped into things.” Tristan rested his head next to his. “I think I like the idea of taking it slow.” He made little circular motions with his palm.
    “That’s good.” He knew it would be so easy to heat things up. But he held off. He shifted his gaze to the ceiling and wondered what the hell he was doing. He had Tristan in his bed, something he’d been dreaming of for a long time, and they were only going to sleep. He was as hard as a pole. He had to be completely crazy and stupid to put himself through this. He could have simply let Tristan go back to the guest room. He might have been alone then, but at least the temptation of the century wouldn’t be lying next to him in the dark. He had to be the dumbest man on the face of the earth.
    “Harry,” Tristan whispered, shifting closer. “This is nice. No one has ever taken their time like this.” Harry closed his eyes, wrapped an arm around Tristan, and slowly stroked the smooth soft skin of his shoulder while Tristan rested his head against his chest.
    He knew he should simply go to sleep and try not to think about having Tristan so close. But there was no fucking way that was going to happen. Harry listened to Tristan breathe, and when he turned over, Harry followed him and pulled him close, not wanting him too far away. He loved the feel of their bodies pressed together.
    “When I asked my mom about sex, she told me that I shouldn’t rush into it,” Tristan whispered. “Of course, I was young and stupid, so I didn’t listen to her. But she also told me that I would know I’d met someone special because they’d care about me for me and not just for sex.” Harry heard the smile in Tristan’s voice and knew he’d done the right thing, even if it was damned hard.
     
     
    H ARRY EVENTUALLY fell asleep and woke with the sun in his eyes and Tristan pressed up against him. He smiled, squeezed Tristan a little closer, and closed his eyes once again, enjoying the simple pleasure of holding Tristan without the immediate expectation of sex. He’d never thought something like this could be so deep-down satisfying. Not that he wasn’t attracted to Tristan—all he