INCIDENT . The INCIDENT that Mum didn’t want to hear about. So I slammed down the phone and dialled 999 . Because that’s what the police officer that came to our school said to do in an EMERGENCY . And this was an
The âI-Had-an-Accidentâ Clothes Even though the INCIDENT happened on Friday, Iâm going to start this story from Monday, because lots of other stuff happened before the INCIDENT . Jodi (our friend and third witness) says that we have to call what happened an INCIDENT and not an ACCIDENT because an ACCIDENT is when something happens by accident and an INCIDENT is something that happens that is not an accident. And what happened at school on Friday was definitely NOT an accident. On Monday, me and Zach walked to school like we always do, because our school is right beside where we live. And Jodiâs mum drove Jodi right into the playground even though Mr Murphy (the Head Teacher) shouts âNO CARS ALLOWED!â out of his window EVERY morning. I donât think Jodiâs mum even hears MrMurphy shouting because she has her music up really loud and I can usually hear what song sheâs singing along to even though all the windows are rolled up. Jodi says her mum is practising for X Factor because sheâs bored of working in the bakery and that sheâs âSICK TO THE BACK TEETHâ of smelling like sausage rolls. But Jodi says her mumâs not very good at singing and that one time the woman who lives upstairs came down to their door and shouted at her mum and called her a âNIGHTMARE NEIGHBOUR!â and said it sounded like a cat was being strangled. So thatâs when we started to spy on the woman who lives upstairs because as Jodi said, âHow does SHE know what it sounds like when you strangle a cat?â And this was a very good question. I have two cats and Zach has one, so we followed her for a while to make sure she wasnât a Cat Strangler. But she didnât really go anywhere and then one day she caught us peeking through her letter box and she phoned the police and even though we told them about her being a Cat Strangler we still got into big trouble. But I didnât really mind because now she knows that âWEâRE ON TO HER!â and Zach said that she was âUNLIKELY TO STRIKE AGAINâ with us watching her. So our cats are safe.
Anyway, I also once heard Mr Murphy tell the office ladies that Jodiâs mum was a âNIGHTMARE PARENTâ . And I didnât think that was a very nice thing for the Head Teacher to say. So I told Jodi and she told her mum and now every time Mr Murphy goes into the bakery, Jodiâs mum gives himthe cakes that have fallen on the ground. But Iâm secretly glad that Jodiâs mum canât sing very well because that means she still has to work in the bakery. So when we go to Jodiâs house there are always loads of doughnuts and yum yums and Bakewell tarts because her mum gets to bring them home for free. Iâve not decided what Iâm going to be when I grow up yet, but Iâm thinking about becoming a baker. So anyway, me and Zach were walking up to the school gates when Miss Jones (our horrible teacher) drove past really fast and splattered us with a massive puddle. Iscreamed, but Zach screamed even louder because he was standing nearest to the road and he got completely SOAKED! Zach screamed even louder than the time I put a pea in each finger of his gloves. Zach is TERRIFIED of peas. His mum says he has a PHOBIA about them, which I think means heâs scared heâs going to turn into one, but Iâm not sure.
Anyway, I got really wet tooand the mud splattered all over my new bag. And Zach got mud all over his teeth because he had his mouth open when Miss Jones splashed us. So we had to go to the school nurse because we were soaking wet and she made us wear the spare âI-had-an-accidentâ clothes and sent us to class. At least we BOTH had to wear