took him across the front of the television, but Martin didn’t notice. I wondered if he’d gone to sleep with his eyes open.
“Hello,” I said to Adrian.
He ignored me.
“I’ll be off then,” said my father.
“Good,” said James to my father’s back.
Adrian started immediately. “Kitty, you must go to the doctor’s.”
I couldn’t make the connection. Did he know something I didn’t? A lump on my breast, varicose veins, high blood pressure? Can you tell these things just by looking? “Why? I thought we were going to have a row about last night.”
“Don’t be facetious. We don’t want to argue, but you must see that your behaviour wasn’t rational.”
“James,” I said. “He’s telling me I’m mad. I’m not, am I?”
“No, you’re not mad,” said James. “Of course not, and nobody is suggesting you are, but—”
“But what?”
“We’re worried about you,” said Adrian. “We feel you’re not quite yourself.”
“Have you two been talking to each other?” I said.
“Obviously,” said James, confusing me. I had expected a reasonable amount of plotting, but I thought they’d be more subtle and deny any collusion. “We spent the whole of last night together, worrying about you.”
“Oh, yes.”
“You do realize,” said Adrian, “that I was in the middle of an important dinner and I had to leave before the main course? I drove all the way back from London, not knowing if Emily and Rosie were even alive. Obviously my family is more important to me than an award, but it’s very embarrassing. What explanation do you think I should give? My sister has behaved irresponsibly?” He paused. “I might have won an award and not been there to collect it.”
“And did you?”
“What?”
“Win?”
“No, actually. But that’s not the point.”
He couldn’t be that upset if he’d found time to telephone and find out. I wanted to say this, but it seemed such an effort to open my mouth that I sat down instead, next to Martin, and wished I could go back to bed.
“I think you should give Kitty some credit for looking after the girls properly,” said James. “They were never going to come to any harm.”
“No,” I said. “That’s right.”
“And presumably they enjoyed Peter Pan. ”
“Yes,” I said.
“You must understand that Lesley was extremely upset.”
I thought of calm, organized, reasonable Lesley, who always knows exactly what she is doing and why. I’ve never seen her upset. “It was a mistake,” I said. “It won’t happen again.”
“No,” said Adrian, standing still at last. “It won’t happenagain because Lesley doesn’t want you near the girls any more.”
I leapt out of my chair. “That’s not fair,” I said. “They’re my nieces.”
We stood facing each other, all of us annoyed. I looked round to see if Martin was going to join us, but he was still watching the football. He dislikes arguments. I was surprised he hadn’t left the room.
“Well,” said Adrian, “Lesley and I have talked it over and we feel that if you are going to be allowed to see the girls again, you must try to sort out why you behaved so irrationally.”
“See,” I said to James. “He thinks I’m mad.”
“No, not mad,” said Adrian, “just—disturbed—”
I would have leapt to my feet, but I was already standing.
“I think that’s a bit strong,” said James mildly. He will never be angry when I want him to. “She planned a treat for the girls which went wrong. That’s hardly disturbed behaviour. More—foolish.”
“Yes,” I say.
“Don’t forget she was out all night,” said Adrian.
“She was at Jake’s,” said James.
“Yes,” I said.
“Goal!” yelled Martin, and leapt off the sofa, his arms shooting upwards. He looked at us, standing tensely in the middle of the room, grinned sheepishly and sat down.
“Yes,” said Adrian. “It’s the wrong word. I chose the wrong word.”
“Well, you’re only a writer,” I
“Hello,” I said to Adrian.
He ignored me.
“I’ll be off then,” said my father.
“Good,” said James to my father’s back.
Adrian started immediately. “Kitty, you must go to the doctor’s.”
I couldn’t make the connection. Did he know something I didn’t? A lump on my breast, varicose veins, high blood pressure? Can you tell these things just by looking? “Why? I thought we were going to have a row about last night.”
“Don’t be facetious. We don’t want to argue, but you must see that your behaviour wasn’t rational.”
“James,” I said. “He’s telling me I’m mad. I’m not, am I?”
“No, you’re not mad,” said James. “Of course not, and nobody is suggesting you are, but—”
“But what?”
“We’re worried about you,” said Adrian. “We feel you’re not quite yourself.”
“Have you two been talking to each other?” I said.
“Obviously,” said James, confusing me. I had expected a reasonable amount of plotting, but I thought they’d be more subtle and deny any collusion. “We spent the whole of last night together, worrying about you.”
“Oh, yes.”
“You do realize,” said Adrian, “that I was in the middle of an important dinner and I had to leave before the main course? I drove all the way back from London, not knowing if Emily and Rosie were even alive. Obviously my family is more important to me than an award, but it’s very embarrassing. What explanation do you think I should give? My sister has behaved irresponsibly?” He paused. “I might have won an award and not been there to collect it.”
“And did you?”
“What?”
“Win?”
“No, actually. But that’s not the point.”
He couldn’t be that upset if he’d found time to telephone and find out. I wanted to say this, but it seemed such an effort to open my mouth that I sat down instead, next to Martin, and wished I could go back to bed.
“I think you should give Kitty some credit for looking after the girls properly,” said James. “They were never going to come to any harm.”
“No,” I said. “That’s right.”
“And presumably they enjoyed Peter Pan. ”
“Yes,” I said.
“You must understand that Lesley was extremely upset.”
I thought of calm, organized, reasonable Lesley, who always knows exactly what she is doing and why. I’ve never seen her upset. “It was a mistake,” I said. “It won’t happen again.”
“No,” said Adrian, standing still at last. “It won’t happenagain because Lesley doesn’t want you near the girls any more.”
I leapt out of my chair. “That’s not fair,” I said. “They’re my nieces.”
We stood facing each other, all of us annoyed. I looked round to see if Martin was going to join us, but he was still watching the football. He dislikes arguments. I was surprised he hadn’t left the room.
“Well,” said Adrian, “Lesley and I have talked it over and we feel that if you are going to be allowed to see the girls again, you must try to sort out why you behaved so irrationally.”
“See,” I said to James. “He thinks I’m mad.”
“No, not mad,” said Adrian, “just—disturbed—”
I would have leapt to my feet, but I was already standing.
“I think that’s a bit strong,” said James mildly. He will never be angry when I want him to. “She planned a treat for the girls which went wrong. That’s hardly disturbed behaviour. More—foolish.”
“Yes,” I say.
“Don’t forget she was out all night,” said Adrian.
“She was at Jake’s,” said James.
“Yes,” I said.
“Goal!” yelled Martin, and leapt off the sofa, his arms shooting upwards. He looked at us, standing tensely in the middle of the room, grinned sheepishly and sat down.
“Yes,” said Adrian. “It’s the wrong word. I chose the wrong word.”
“Well, you’re only a writer,” I
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