the remnant of Rience’s host had fled in disarray, King Leodegrance had the drawbridge lowered and King Arthur entered the castle of Cameliard, where the two kings embraced.
“My dear Arthur,” said King Leodegrance, “I have heard of your prowess, but what you have done here this morning exceeds all expectation. You have delivered Cameliard, and as a warrior I have not seen your like since the death of my old friend Uther Pendragon. But after such a victory Uther and his men would now be swallowing all the drink they could find here, molesting all the women, and looting the treasury, so that the difference between ally and enemy might dwindle to the thickness of a mouse’s whisker.”
“So have I heard,” said King Arthur, pleased to allow his paternity to remain unknown.
“Whereas,” said Leodegrance, “do I not see your entire host on their knees at prayers?”
“Indeed you do,” said Arthur.
“Well then,” said King Leodegrance, “I am at a loss as to what to give you in reward.”
“We British,” said King Arthur, “fight for no gain save in honor.”
“That is unique in mine experience,” said the old king of Cameliard. “And whether such practice can be consonant with a long reign remains to be proved. Yet no doubt ’tis noble. But, my dear friend, permit me by the license of my gray hairs to say that honor can not properly be gained by depriving another man of his own. Namely, I should be shamed were I not allowed to reward my deliverer. But after this long siege my cupboards are bare and my coffers empty, and there is no land in tiny Cameliard that I might give away. Alas, I can not even invite you to feast with me now, for there is nothing to eat in the castle.”
“My lord,” said Arthur, “permit me if you will in these circumstances to feed you, for my seneschal has come along in the rear guard, with stores and cooks. If he might use your kitchens and banquet hall, we shall have our feast.”
And when the meal had been prepared under the direction of Sir Kay, who had brought along from Caerleon all that was necessary, the two kings were seated together at an immense round table that filled the great hall which was a quarter of a league broad and the same distance in length. And as this table was the most vastest that he had ever seen, King Arthur inquired into the provenance of it.
“Was a wheel from a giant’s cart,” said King Leodegrance. “See there in the middle the hole for the axle, where the servants stand currently, carving the joint.”
“So they are,” said Arthur. “I had supposed they were kneeling on the top.”
“Is a solid disk, you know,” said Leodegrance, smiting the wood with his several rings. “A cross-section of one great oak, perhaps but a sapling in the olden time. The world has gone smaller throughout its history. The Colossus at Rhodes is said to be but the statue of a typical Greek of the time of its construction.” The older king guffawed. “And if one could believe him whom you have succeeded, mine old chum Uther Pendragon, the River Thames came into being from the piss of one great dragon.” Leodegrance laughed again. “Perhaps himself, for ’a would void vast quantities of urine when drinking!”
And Arthur reflected that he had never heard ought of his father that did not offend his own taste.
“And unlike most drunkards,” the older king went on, “Uther was a prodigious swyver as well. I have known him to deflower a maiden for every bottle, when in his prime, and in the course of a week he would drink up half one’s cellar. He sorely taxed the resources of little Cameliard.”
“Well then,” said King Arthur, concealing his grimace in his beard, “the special value of this table methinks is that there’s neither head nor foot to it. At Caerleon we have no table as yet for the reason that I have never wished to cause envy amongst my men over these matters of precedence in sitting at meat. A circle can never be put to
“My dear Arthur,” said King Leodegrance, “I have heard of your prowess, but what you have done here this morning exceeds all expectation. You have delivered Cameliard, and as a warrior I have not seen your like since the death of my old friend Uther Pendragon. But after such a victory Uther and his men would now be swallowing all the drink they could find here, molesting all the women, and looting the treasury, so that the difference between ally and enemy might dwindle to the thickness of a mouse’s whisker.”
“So have I heard,” said King Arthur, pleased to allow his paternity to remain unknown.
“Whereas,” said Leodegrance, “do I not see your entire host on their knees at prayers?”
“Indeed you do,” said Arthur.
“Well then,” said King Leodegrance, “I am at a loss as to what to give you in reward.”
“We British,” said King Arthur, “fight for no gain save in honor.”
“That is unique in mine experience,” said the old king of Cameliard. “And whether such practice can be consonant with a long reign remains to be proved. Yet no doubt ’tis noble. But, my dear friend, permit me by the license of my gray hairs to say that honor can not properly be gained by depriving another man of his own. Namely, I should be shamed were I not allowed to reward my deliverer. But after this long siege my cupboards are bare and my coffers empty, and there is no land in tiny Cameliard that I might give away. Alas, I can not even invite you to feast with me now, for there is nothing to eat in the castle.”
“My lord,” said Arthur, “permit me if you will in these circumstances to feed you, for my seneschal has come along in the rear guard, with stores and cooks. If he might use your kitchens and banquet hall, we shall have our feast.”
And when the meal had been prepared under the direction of Sir Kay, who had brought along from Caerleon all that was necessary, the two kings were seated together at an immense round table that filled the great hall which was a quarter of a league broad and the same distance in length. And as this table was the most vastest that he had ever seen, King Arthur inquired into the provenance of it.
“Was a wheel from a giant’s cart,” said King Leodegrance. “See there in the middle the hole for the axle, where the servants stand currently, carving the joint.”
“So they are,” said Arthur. “I had supposed they were kneeling on the top.”
“Is a solid disk, you know,” said Leodegrance, smiting the wood with his several rings. “A cross-section of one great oak, perhaps but a sapling in the olden time. The world has gone smaller throughout its history. The Colossus at Rhodes is said to be but the statue of a typical Greek of the time of its construction.” The older king guffawed. “And if one could believe him whom you have succeeded, mine old chum Uther Pendragon, the River Thames came into being from the piss of one great dragon.” Leodegrance laughed again. “Perhaps himself, for ’a would void vast quantities of urine when drinking!”
And Arthur reflected that he had never heard ought of his father that did not offend his own taste.
“And unlike most drunkards,” the older king went on, “Uther was a prodigious swyver as well. I have known him to deflower a maiden for every bottle, when in his prime, and in the course of a week he would drink up half one’s cellar. He sorely taxed the resources of little Cameliard.”
“Well then,” said King Arthur, concealing his grimace in his beard, “the special value of this table methinks is that there’s neither head nor foot to it. At Caerleon we have no table as yet for the reason that I have never wished to cause envy amongst my men over these matters of precedence in sitting at meat. A circle can never be put to
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