hands thinking,
SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
Sarah felt sweat beading under her arms and trickling down to her bra. She took deep breaths and silently prayed,
Jesus, what do I say?
Then to her surprise she heard her voice throughout the room again.
“I’m praying about it, and when I hear from the Lord, then I’ll know what to do.” There was a stunned silence for three long seconds; then a dam of conversation burst. Everyone was talking to someone. Sarah stood in the back supported by her unseen helpers, watching the bedlam in slow motion. She scanned the crowd and heard her name everywhere. There were ugly looks, incredulous stares, fingers pointing, and tongues wagging.
Oh Jesus, I just want to please You; do I have to make everyone angry doing that?
She turned and pushed open the big oak door. The chilly evening wind blew across her warm body; she inhaled deeply. The tears came again, obscuring her view as she held the handrail and felt her way down the steps. Joel and Malta escorted her back to the car.
She pulled out of Edna’s driveway and turned left. She’d go the extra three blocks out of the way to avoid driving past the Elks hall. Intimidation, Lying, and Despair were all attacking simultaneously. They were shouting about how foolish she was, how she hadn’t heard from the Lord, and how she’d never have a friend the rest of her pathetic life.
When she was almost home, Joel suggested a drive out to the land. It didn’t sound like an especially appealing idea, but neither did going home. She passed her street and headed for Old Highway 3.
C HAPTER 12
“Plenty of people wish to become devout, but no one wishes to be humble.”
Joseph Addison 1
Several additional spirits swarmed around Sarah, the result of the verbal curses that the town’s people were unknowingly putting on her. The spirits’ glowing yellow eyes peered from black scorpion-like bodies. Sarah suddenly felt nauseated, but attributed it to the horrendous experience she’d just had.
In just a few minutes she was there. As she turned off Old Highway 3 and onto the property, she heard the gravel crunching under her tires. A hundred yards from the intersection was an old cattle gate. She got out and with a groan and much effort pushed it open. She got back in the car, pulled through the entrance, and then got out again and closed the gate. The extra effort was worth it; she didn’t want anyone to know she was here. She didn’t want anyone to know she was anywhere. She just wanted to disappear off the face of the planet. Even with her angelic companions in the front seat, she’d never felt so alone in her whole life.
She sat in the car, scanned the land, and prayed in the Spirit, but this time there was no accompanying joy. The first field had been harvested. There were broken corn stalks everywhere. To the east she could see the remains of the house that was built by the original owners in the 1800s. The stone chimney rose eerily in the moonlight. The barn had been gone for years.
She hadn’t been here for a long time, not since George died. Her loneliness, plus tonight’s pressures and the demonic presence, overwhelmed her again as she crossed her arms over the steering wheel and sobbed.
What would George think about a jail? Can he see me now? Where is George anyway? Heaven?
She tried to encourage herself and refused to dwell on the alternative.
Delighting in their cruel assignments, the spirits swarmed around her. “Where’s God in the midst of this?” growled Despair, gnashing his yellow teeth at her. “Why did He tell you to do something that makes everyone mad and then leave you alone and defenseless? Everyone hates you. You’ll never be accepted by anyone in this town ever again.”
“I thought knowing God was supposed to make you feel good and love everyone. It’s only made you lonely,” taunted Accusation as it burrowed its hooked talons into the side of her head.
“You probably heard wrong on this
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