eyes.
“Holy. Shit,” August said as the two of us took a seat.
“Why ‘holy shit’?” I couldn’t help but ask.
“Calm down guys,” Adrian muttered, looking flustered for the first time since I met him. I glanced between him and his friends.
“What’s going on?” I whispered and Adrian shook his head.
“Nothing. They’re just fuck-tards and aren’t used to meeting beautiful women.”
“No,” August said, “Adrian’s never ever and I mean never ever brought a girl to meet us.”
“Shut up,” Adrian grumbled as my eyes widened.
“Oh well, we’re just friends,” I clarified.
“Right,” Chris drawled as everyone watched me. I felt myself go hot under their scrutiny.
“Stop looking at her like that,” Adrian said, coming to my defense. “She won’t ever come back if you keep gawking at her.”
“Hard not to, man. She’s different, not your normal type.”
“Yeah, she looks…normal,” August said.
My heart leapt. I was rarely ever called normal and it was nice.
“And you broke one of your rules by bringing her here,” Marcus chimed in.
“Rule? You have rules?” I asked, amused. “Tell me what these rules are. I have to know.”
Adrian glowered at his friends. “If I would have known you guys were going to give me shit for bringing a friend here I wouldn’t have done it.”
Ignoring him, Marcus explained, “He has a bunch of rules. And might I add that he’s had these rules since he was in college…”
“After that disaster in college with…what was her name again?” August asked.
“Clara,” Chris replied.
“That’s right. Creepy Clara who stalked you for months,” August said with a chuckle. “She was pretty fucked up over you.”
As the guys bantered over Clara, I made a mental note to ask Adrian more about this girl and what happened between the two of them to make him create all these so called rules. But for the moment I’d let it go. I needed to know what these rules were.
After a few minutes of Adrian swearing and the guys laughing, Marcus leaned forward and said to me, “Anyway, the first rule is never, ever let a girl sleep over because once a girl sleeps over she thinks it means relationship.”
“But there are girls leaving your house in the morning,” I said to Adrian, confused.
“Yes, but,” Chris began with a shake of his head, “if your fucking, you’re not sleeping.”
“Wow, which is why it’s always so noisy over there,” I said with a smile.
“It’s been quiet lately though,” Adrian said seriously. “Haven’t you noticed?”
I furrowed my brow. “Of course, but I have a feeling it’s because you’re over your life of easy women and lonely mornings. You’re ready to grow up and be a big boy.”
Adrian glowered at me as his friends watched our interaction in silence. Feeling suddenly insecure at my comment and how it could be misconstrued, I turned toward Marcus to take the focus off me. “What is the second rule?”
“Never buy gifts,” he replied.
“And why is that?” I asked, looking at Adrian.
He shrugged as August explained, “Because that means commitment.”
“Or break up. And Adrian likes to avoid confrontation when possible.”
I nodded in understanding as Marcus listed off the third rule. “And never ever introduce them to family or friends.”
“And never cook for them!” Marcus shouted.
“And always use a condom,” Chris added.
“And never ever use missionary style when fucking,” August said with a shit-eating grin.
“And why is that?” I asked with a laugh, enjoying his friends more and more.
“Because that says ‘I love you’,” August said.
“Oh and never, ever kiss unless you’re actively having sex because that means...”
“…a relationship,” all the guys roared collectively.
“Oh my god,” I said with a groan. “Where did you come up with these things?”
Adrian was scowling at his friends and didn’t look at me when he replied, “It was to save girls
“Holy. Shit,” August said as the two of us took a seat.
“Why ‘holy shit’?” I couldn’t help but ask.
“Calm down guys,” Adrian muttered, looking flustered for the first time since I met him. I glanced between him and his friends.
“What’s going on?” I whispered and Adrian shook his head.
“Nothing. They’re just fuck-tards and aren’t used to meeting beautiful women.”
“No,” August said, “Adrian’s never ever and I mean never ever brought a girl to meet us.”
“Shut up,” Adrian grumbled as my eyes widened.
“Oh well, we’re just friends,” I clarified.
“Right,” Chris drawled as everyone watched me. I felt myself go hot under their scrutiny.
“Stop looking at her like that,” Adrian said, coming to my defense. “She won’t ever come back if you keep gawking at her.”
“Hard not to, man. She’s different, not your normal type.”
“Yeah, she looks…normal,” August said.
My heart leapt. I was rarely ever called normal and it was nice.
“And you broke one of your rules by bringing her here,” Marcus chimed in.
“Rule? You have rules?” I asked, amused. “Tell me what these rules are. I have to know.”
Adrian glowered at his friends. “If I would have known you guys were going to give me shit for bringing a friend here I wouldn’t have done it.”
Ignoring him, Marcus explained, “He has a bunch of rules. And might I add that he’s had these rules since he was in college…”
“After that disaster in college with…what was her name again?” August asked.
“Clara,” Chris replied.
“That’s right. Creepy Clara who stalked you for months,” August said with a chuckle. “She was pretty fucked up over you.”
As the guys bantered over Clara, I made a mental note to ask Adrian more about this girl and what happened between the two of them to make him create all these so called rules. But for the moment I’d let it go. I needed to know what these rules were.
After a few minutes of Adrian swearing and the guys laughing, Marcus leaned forward and said to me, “Anyway, the first rule is never, ever let a girl sleep over because once a girl sleeps over she thinks it means relationship.”
“But there are girls leaving your house in the morning,” I said to Adrian, confused.
“Yes, but,” Chris began with a shake of his head, “if your fucking, you’re not sleeping.”
“Wow, which is why it’s always so noisy over there,” I said with a smile.
“It’s been quiet lately though,” Adrian said seriously. “Haven’t you noticed?”
I furrowed my brow. “Of course, but I have a feeling it’s because you’re over your life of easy women and lonely mornings. You’re ready to grow up and be a big boy.”
Adrian glowered at me as his friends watched our interaction in silence. Feeling suddenly insecure at my comment and how it could be misconstrued, I turned toward Marcus to take the focus off me. “What is the second rule?”
“Never buy gifts,” he replied.
“And why is that?” I asked, looking at Adrian.
He shrugged as August explained, “Because that means commitment.”
“Or break up. And Adrian likes to avoid confrontation when possible.”
I nodded in understanding as Marcus listed off the third rule. “And never ever introduce them to family or friends.”
“And never cook for them!” Marcus shouted.
“And always use a condom,” Chris added.
“And never ever use missionary style when fucking,” August said with a shit-eating grin.
“And why is that?” I asked with a laugh, enjoying his friends more and more.
“Because that says ‘I love you’,” August said.
“Oh and never, ever kiss unless you’re actively having sex because that means...”
“…a relationship,” all the guys roared collectively.
“Oh my god,” I said with a groan. “Where did you come up with these things?”
Adrian was scowling at his friends and didn’t look at me when he replied, “It was to save girls
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