senses. Stirred up flames until he felt the heat spreading through every inch of his body. He didn’t let her go.
Couldn’t
let her go.
Because he’d never really said good-bye?
Because she’d never left his mind?
Because he was an idiot letting his dick do the thinking for him again?
Or all of the above?
“That’s what makes me nuts, Sam,” he said, his voice hard, low, amazed. “You never
had
to try. You just do it. Always did.”
Some of the starch left her spine. Her shoulders slumped and she almost leaned into him. Almost. Her hands relaxed against him, her palms lying flat on his chest. Jeff could have sworn he felt the imprint of her hands on his skin.
“What did that ever get us, Jeff?” she asked quietly.
“Emma, for one thing.”
She smiled all too briefly. “But we lost
us
.”
True. Though he’d be a liar if he didn’t admit, at least silently, that he’d wondered often, over the years, what might have happened if they’d stuck it out. If one of them had only dug in their heels and demanded that the other
listen
. But they’d been too young. Too eager to blame. Too quick to quit.
And now it was too late.
Wasn’t it?
God, she felt good.
“Jeff . . .” She shook her head even as he lowered his head to hers. Even as his mouth hovered just a breath away from hers. “We can’t do this—”
She was right.
It was stupid.
And he absolutely
had
to. “Call it a nine-years-late good-bye kiss.”
His mouth met hers and the flash of something hot, familiar, and overpowering hit him hard and fast. His body went tight. His blood pumped. His body tightened and his breath strangled in his lungs. Desire,
need
, was so overpowering, he felt his knees rock.
Then the guilt kicked in, slamming into him with a punch solid enough to steal what was left of his breath.
Instantly he let her go and took a step back. It wasn’t far enough, but it was all he could manage.
“Sorry,” he muttered, scraping one hand across his face as if he could wipe away the kiss and the memory of it. She looked as shaken as he, but true to her nature, she’d never admit it. Already, any semblance of softness had dropped away, like shadows disappearing when a light flicked off.
“That solved nothing.”
“Didn’t expect it to.” He didn’t know what to do with his hands. Now that he wasn’t touching her, they felt empty.
“So what was the point?”
“Jesus, does there have to
be
a point?”
“Usually.”
“Well, not this time.”
She continued as if he hadn’t spoken at all. “Because if you’re trying to soften me up, confuse me withsome lame-ass kiss designed to remind me of happier days—”
“You think I
planned
to do that?”
“Please.” She snorted. “You always had a plan.”
“Oh, that’s good. Coming from you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He stared at her. “Aren’t you the one who once told me we’d have five children and then listed their names and where they’d go to school?”
She flushed. “That was different.”
“Oh,
your
plans are okay?”
“You are so far off the subject here.”
“What exactly
is
the subject?”
“Emma.”
Worry stirred inside him. “We’ll work something out.”
“Damn straight.”
“Never give an inch.”
“You got that right.”
In a weird sort of way, he almost admired that. He must be a masochist.
“There’s something else.”
“What?” Wary, Jeff waited.
“I want Emma this weekend.”
“I don’t—”
“You’ve had her for eight years, Jeff. I want time with her. I
need
time with her.”
He heard the desperation in her voice. Read it in her eyes. Felt it pulsing off her in thick, emotionally charged waves that wrapped around him and drew him close. He could fight her on it. He could hurt her and make Emma miserable. Or he could be a good guy.
Dammit, he hated being the good one.
“All right.”
Sam was already beginning to argue when she realized that he’d agreed. It threw her off
Couldn’t
let her go.
Because he’d never really said good-bye?
Because she’d never left his mind?
Because he was an idiot letting his dick do the thinking for him again?
Or all of the above?
“That’s what makes me nuts, Sam,” he said, his voice hard, low, amazed. “You never
had
to try. You just do it. Always did.”
Some of the starch left her spine. Her shoulders slumped and she almost leaned into him. Almost. Her hands relaxed against him, her palms lying flat on his chest. Jeff could have sworn he felt the imprint of her hands on his skin.
“What did that ever get us, Jeff?” she asked quietly.
“Emma, for one thing.”
She smiled all too briefly. “But we lost
us
.”
True. Though he’d be a liar if he didn’t admit, at least silently, that he’d wondered often, over the years, what might have happened if they’d stuck it out. If one of them had only dug in their heels and demanded that the other
listen
. But they’d been too young. Too eager to blame. Too quick to quit.
And now it was too late.
Wasn’t it?
God, she felt good.
“Jeff . . .” She shook her head even as he lowered his head to hers. Even as his mouth hovered just a breath away from hers. “We can’t do this—”
She was right.
It was stupid.
And he absolutely
had
to. “Call it a nine-years-late good-bye kiss.”
His mouth met hers and the flash of something hot, familiar, and overpowering hit him hard and fast. His body went tight. His blood pumped. His body tightened and his breath strangled in his lungs. Desire,
need
, was so overpowering, he felt his knees rock.
Then the guilt kicked in, slamming into him with a punch solid enough to steal what was left of his breath.
Instantly he let her go and took a step back. It wasn’t far enough, but it was all he could manage.
“Sorry,” he muttered, scraping one hand across his face as if he could wipe away the kiss and the memory of it. She looked as shaken as he, but true to her nature, she’d never admit it. Already, any semblance of softness had dropped away, like shadows disappearing when a light flicked off.
“That solved nothing.”
“Didn’t expect it to.” He didn’t know what to do with his hands. Now that he wasn’t touching her, they felt empty.
“So what was the point?”
“Jesus, does there have to
be
a point?”
“Usually.”
“Well, not this time.”
She continued as if he hadn’t spoken at all. “Because if you’re trying to soften me up, confuse me withsome lame-ass kiss designed to remind me of happier days—”
“You think I
planned
to do that?”
“Please.” She snorted. “You always had a plan.”
“Oh, that’s good. Coming from you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He stared at her. “Aren’t you the one who once told me we’d have five children and then listed their names and where they’d go to school?”
She flushed. “That was different.”
“Oh,
your
plans are okay?”
“You are so far off the subject here.”
“What exactly
is
the subject?”
“Emma.”
Worry stirred inside him. “We’ll work something out.”
“Damn straight.”
“Never give an inch.”
“You got that right.”
In a weird sort of way, he almost admired that. He must be a masochist.
“There’s something else.”
“What?” Wary, Jeff waited.
“I want Emma this weekend.”
“I don’t—”
“You’ve had her for eight years, Jeff. I want time with her. I
need
time with her.”
He heard the desperation in her voice. Read it in her eyes. Felt it pulsing off her in thick, emotionally charged waves that wrapped around him and drew him close. He could fight her on it. He could hurt her and make Emma miserable. Or he could be a good guy.
Dammit, he hated being the good one.
“All right.”
Sam was already beginning to argue when she realized that he’d agreed. It threw her off
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