Kellan and how we had struck up a long distance friendship.
“You’re trying to tell me, Cam, your girl, that you have only friendly feelings for him?”
“He is a good friend.”
“Bullshit! He told you he wants more. You’re visiting him in Maryland . You told him about the fucker that raped you.”
I flinched. Cam had never outright brought up me being raped. I took a deep breath. She reached across the table and grabbed my hand.
“It happened, Mackayla. Nothin g is going to change that. Not talking about it, not avoiding the subject. It changed you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t overcome it. It doesn’t mean that you can’t have a relationship with a man who seems perfect for you.”
“What if I ruin it? I need this job.”
And that had been the root of my fear. It wasn’t that I didn’t want Kellan, it’s that I didn’t want to lose him or my job because I sucked at relationships and couldn’t hold one together.
“You never know what’s going to happen. But that’s part of the fun. You’re building something from nothing. It’s not fair for you to deny yourself or him of that.”
I replayed that conversation several times. Finally ready to hear what Cam had been telling me for years. I was finally ready to try something out of the bubble I had created around myself.
I told myself the reason I was going to Maryland was because it was good business. I needed to show Kellan that I could go anywhere he needed me to, if it meant getting the job done. But the truth of the matter was, I had been lying to myself.
I wanted to go to Maryland to see Kellan. I wanted to be the person he saw in me. So I was landing in Maryland, a place I had sworn to never return to, to see a man I wanted to try having a relationship with, a real relationship – not just a friendship.
Now, how was I going to tell him that?
Kellan
I had made this stupid sign to be funny. This was a very serious moment in Mac’s life so, of course, I was going to make a fool of myself. I wanted to see her smile. I hadn’t told her that I’d be at the airport picking her up. I put on the black driver’s hat I had bought down the street from my apartment after I made the sign.
I stood at the bottom of the escalators where the incoming passengers would come to be picked up. I had paid the no parking guy (you know, the one that tells you to keep moving and you can’t park on the curb) to allow me to keep my car parked while I went in to pick up Mac. So, $300, a pink sign and black driver’s hat later – here I was picking up a woman I never thought would come to Maryland.
I watched a handful of people come down the escalator. None of them Mac. After watching another twenty people filter down, I saw her. Her shoes were the first thing I saw, then her magnificently toned legs, then her beautiful face. She was more stunning than I remembered her being. I covered my face with the sign and waited. I heard laughing in front of me.
“I hope Kellan paid you well to hold that sign.”
Mac said through her laughs. The sign said, in sparkly silver glitter, Mac ain’t whack! I’m driving you to unpack! It was a horrible rhyme, but one I knew would make her laugh.
I slowly lowered the sign. Mac was wearing a red pencil skirt, with a white button down top. She had her hair pulled into a bun with a red flower adorning it. Her makeup was subtle, but there. She looked amazing. I swallowed hard as I uncovered the rest of my face. Mac finally realized it was me.
“Kellan.”
She said my name on a breath, and it was like nothing I had ever felt before. Her eyes warmed and I couldn’t miss the look of shock. I dropped the sign. So she could see all of me.
She ran into my arms and I held her tightly, not missing the opportunity to feel her against me. It had felt like too long since I’d seen her. She ran her hands up my neck, into my hair and tugged a little. I pulled my head back enough to see her face and rested my forehead against
“You’re trying to tell me, Cam, your girl, that you have only friendly feelings for him?”
“He is a good friend.”
“Bullshit! He told you he wants more. You’re visiting him in Maryland . You told him about the fucker that raped you.”
I flinched. Cam had never outright brought up me being raped. I took a deep breath. She reached across the table and grabbed my hand.
“It happened, Mackayla. Nothin g is going to change that. Not talking about it, not avoiding the subject. It changed you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t overcome it. It doesn’t mean that you can’t have a relationship with a man who seems perfect for you.”
“What if I ruin it? I need this job.”
And that had been the root of my fear. It wasn’t that I didn’t want Kellan, it’s that I didn’t want to lose him or my job because I sucked at relationships and couldn’t hold one together.
“You never know what’s going to happen. But that’s part of the fun. You’re building something from nothing. It’s not fair for you to deny yourself or him of that.”
I replayed that conversation several times. Finally ready to hear what Cam had been telling me for years. I was finally ready to try something out of the bubble I had created around myself.
I told myself the reason I was going to Maryland was because it was good business. I needed to show Kellan that I could go anywhere he needed me to, if it meant getting the job done. But the truth of the matter was, I had been lying to myself.
I wanted to go to Maryland to see Kellan. I wanted to be the person he saw in me. So I was landing in Maryland, a place I had sworn to never return to, to see a man I wanted to try having a relationship with, a real relationship – not just a friendship.
Now, how was I going to tell him that?
Kellan
I had made this stupid sign to be funny. This was a very serious moment in Mac’s life so, of course, I was going to make a fool of myself. I wanted to see her smile. I hadn’t told her that I’d be at the airport picking her up. I put on the black driver’s hat I had bought down the street from my apartment after I made the sign.
I stood at the bottom of the escalators where the incoming passengers would come to be picked up. I had paid the no parking guy (you know, the one that tells you to keep moving and you can’t park on the curb) to allow me to keep my car parked while I went in to pick up Mac. So, $300, a pink sign and black driver’s hat later – here I was picking up a woman I never thought would come to Maryland.
I watched a handful of people come down the escalator. None of them Mac. After watching another twenty people filter down, I saw her. Her shoes were the first thing I saw, then her magnificently toned legs, then her beautiful face. She was more stunning than I remembered her being. I covered my face with the sign and waited. I heard laughing in front of me.
“I hope Kellan paid you well to hold that sign.”
Mac said through her laughs. The sign said, in sparkly silver glitter, Mac ain’t whack! I’m driving you to unpack! It was a horrible rhyme, but one I knew would make her laugh.
I slowly lowered the sign. Mac was wearing a red pencil skirt, with a white button down top. She had her hair pulled into a bun with a red flower adorning it. Her makeup was subtle, but there. She looked amazing. I swallowed hard as I uncovered the rest of my face. Mac finally realized it was me.
“Kellan.”
She said my name on a breath, and it was like nothing I had ever felt before. Her eyes warmed and I couldn’t miss the look of shock. I dropped the sign. So she could see all of me.
She ran into my arms and I held her tightly, not missing the opportunity to feel her against me. It had felt like too long since I’d seen her. She ran her hands up my neck, into my hair and tugged a little. I pulled my head back enough to see her face and rested my forehead against
Similar Books
