, and he became a shadow of his former self for a while. Soon after the news was announced, I was leaving Breeton House for the final time.
On the day of my transfer, Sarah, my Social Worker , arrived to pick me up. I said goodbye to my friends and then finally hugged Jake as tight ly as I could. We were both sobbing so hard we could bare ly breathe; we literally had to be pri ed apart. I was escorted to the car and was heading to Maidstone Children’s Home in Shropshire.
I cried all the way and asked Sarah if I would be able to stay in contact with Jake. She said, “ I am sure something could be arranged . ” I knew she was just appeasing me and that I would never see Jake again, at least not until I reached adulthood. The very thought broke my heart into a million pieces. I just could not imagine my life witho ut Jake in it; we had been through everything together, we kept each other going when things got really tough , and we understood each other. How would Jake manage without me? As far as I was concerned I had been stripped of the last important thing in my life. W hat did I care what happened to me now? I just wanted to die; I no longer wanted to live any more. L ife was far too painful , and there was no joy in living.
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Maidstone C hildren’s H ome
I had not long turned twelve years old when I arrived at Maidstone C hildren’s Home. This was a small unit within the grounds of the main Maidstone complex, the purpose of which was to determine the best place to send me in the near future, depending on the ir observation of me.
If they thought you could cope with being sent far away into a large children’s home, which would house at least one hundred children at any one time, then that’s where they would send you as this was best for them financially. If they thought you were not able to deal with such a placement then you would remain at the Maidstone Children’s Home and be transferred to their main unit. H owever , places were very limited and not often available, so on occasion they had no choice but to send you where ver there was a placement available. Large institutio ns were rife in the 70s and 80s. T hese children’s homes were dotted all o ver the country and they were full of faceless children, who as far as the rest of the world was concerned were under the radar and did not exist.
I was to remain at Maidstone C hildren’s H ome for three months, and I was not sent to school during this period of time while I was being assessed. I was to remain in the confines of the unit; a member of staff had to be present at all times except when you went to the bathroom.
It was at Maidstone C hildren’s Home when my first period arrived . I woke up one morning crying, and there was blood everywhere. I had no idea what had happened to me. I thought I was seriously ill and started screaming.
Tracy, a member of staff , came running up the stairs calling, “Amelia , what is it , a re you ok ay? ” I pulled back my bedclothes and cried. Tracy looked at me with the m ost genuine smile on her face. S he held my hand and went on to explain exactly what had happened to me. My body had made the transition from child to woman o ver night while I was sleeping. I had never been educated on such things before , so the arrival of this was a total shock and most unexpected. Tracy went and fetched me the necessary toiletries needed on such an important day . She went on to say that I might not feel myse lf for a few days and that I might have tummy cramps. I did not like this move into woman hood one little bit; it was rather painful to say the least and most inconvenient.
There was not much to do at Maidstone, which gave me ample time to think about Jake, Jenny , and Susie. I was filled with sadness from head to toe. I asked if I could make a phone call to Breeton House to speak to J ake, but my request was denied. I was informed it was in both our interests. I refused to
On the day of my transfer, Sarah, my Social Worker , arrived to pick me up. I said goodbye to my friends and then finally hugged Jake as tight ly as I could. We were both sobbing so hard we could bare ly breathe; we literally had to be pri ed apart. I was escorted to the car and was heading to Maidstone Children’s Home in Shropshire.
I cried all the way and asked Sarah if I would be able to stay in contact with Jake. She said, “ I am sure something could be arranged . ” I knew she was just appeasing me and that I would never see Jake again, at least not until I reached adulthood. The very thought broke my heart into a million pieces. I just could not imagine my life witho ut Jake in it; we had been through everything together, we kept each other going when things got really tough , and we understood each other. How would Jake manage without me? As far as I was concerned I had been stripped of the last important thing in my life. W hat did I care what happened to me now? I just wanted to die; I no longer wanted to live any more. L ife was far too painful , and there was no joy in living.
Back to Table of Contents
Maidstone C hildren’s H ome
I had not long turned twelve years old when I arrived at Maidstone C hildren’s Home. This was a small unit within the grounds of the main Maidstone complex, the purpose of which was to determine the best place to send me in the near future, depending on the ir observation of me.
If they thought you could cope with being sent far away into a large children’s home, which would house at least one hundred children at any one time, then that’s where they would send you as this was best for them financially. If they thought you were not able to deal with such a placement then you would remain at the Maidstone Children’s Home and be transferred to their main unit. H owever , places were very limited and not often available, so on occasion they had no choice but to send you where ver there was a placement available. Large institutio ns were rife in the 70s and 80s. T hese children’s homes were dotted all o ver the country and they were full of faceless children, who as far as the rest of the world was concerned were under the radar and did not exist.
I was to remain at Maidstone C hildren’s H ome for three months, and I was not sent to school during this period of time while I was being assessed. I was to remain in the confines of the unit; a member of staff had to be present at all times except when you went to the bathroom.
It was at Maidstone C hildren’s Home when my first period arrived . I woke up one morning crying, and there was blood everywhere. I had no idea what had happened to me. I thought I was seriously ill and started screaming.
Tracy, a member of staff , came running up the stairs calling, “Amelia , what is it , a re you ok ay? ” I pulled back my bedclothes and cried. Tracy looked at me with the m ost genuine smile on her face. S he held my hand and went on to explain exactly what had happened to me. My body had made the transition from child to woman o ver night while I was sleeping. I had never been educated on such things before , so the arrival of this was a total shock and most unexpected. Tracy went and fetched me the necessary toiletries needed on such an important day . She went on to say that I might not feel myse lf for a few days and that I might have tummy cramps. I did not like this move into woman hood one little bit; it was rather painful to say the least and most inconvenient.
There was not much to do at Maidstone, which gave me ample time to think about Jake, Jenny , and Susie. I was filled with sadness from head to toe. I asked if I could make a phone call to Breeton House to speak to J ake, but my request was denied. I was informed it was in both our interests. I refused to
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