father was alive.
“All that really matters is that my dad is alive, and that he loves me,” Kwame said.
Callie’s eyes misted, but she tried not to let the tears fall. In that simple statement, her son was letting her know that he forgave her, that he was looking at the big picture.
It made Callie think once again about the letter her aunt had left her and her sisters. How her own mother had been in some kind of trouble and had fled. Couldn’t she have sat Callie down and reasonably explained to her what was going on? Explain that there was some sort of trouble, that she loved them and had to leave them for a while? Callie had been eight. Old enough to get the jist of a serious conversation.
The very fact that Kwame was being so forgiving made it clear that kids simply needed to be told the truth. Adults often doubted a child’s ability to handle the truth, but children were stronger than people thought.
Thinking of their mother, Callie felt the familiar anxiety. The pain. That sense of abandonment that was like nothing else.
And then she remembered Natalie’s comment. That if their mother knew better, she would have done better.
Natalie was ready to forgive, no question. But there had to be other ways to parent than to leave your kids in the dark in an effort to protect—
The thought died abruptly. Callie caught herself, and was ashamed. Maybe she ought to be more like Natalie, willing to forgive. Because hadn’t she kept her son in the dark regarding the truth about his father?
No, she hadn’t outright lied to Kwame, but she hadn’t been truthful either. Her son had been left to fill in the blanks, and had assumed that his father was dead.
While Callie could perhaps forgive her mother for keeping her secrets, what she wasn’t yet ready to forgive her for was the bigger crime: abandoning her and her sisters. The fact that she’d been in touch with their aunt for at least a few years meant she could have sent letters for her own daughters, if not called.
She had chosen to stay away.
That was what hurt the most.
And if she was still alive today, yet had stayed away all these years…well, how could her mother explain that in a way that would absolve her guilt?
Yes, Callie had made her share of mistakes. She hadn’t been a perfect parent. But as she pulled Kwame against her body, she knew that she’d done at least one thing right. She had raised a warm and caring young man.
“When do I see Dad again?” Kwame asked.
“Um, I don’t know. Maybe tomorrow?”
“When do we go back to Florida?”
“I haven’t booked our return trip home,” Callie said.
Kwame smiled. “Good.”
“Good?” Callie questioned.
“I want to spend as much time with Dad as possible.”
Callie nodded. “Of course. And you will.”
“Can we call Dad now?” Kwame asked.
“He’s working, remember?”
Kwame frowned slightly.
“Don’t worry. We’ll call him in the morning.”
“Okay.” Kwame rose from the bed. “I’m gonna go back downstairs. I have to finish my game.”
“You do that.”
And as Kwame bounded out of the room, Callie realized her conundrum. She couldn’t simply leave and head back to Florida, go on with her life as she had known it.
Because like it or not, her life once again included Nigel.
And in a way that she would never have anticipated ten years ago.
Ten years ago, she always thought that if she and Nigel were to have children, they would be a married, loving couple.
But life didn’t always work out the way a person planned. Callie knew that better than anyone else.
Chapter 9
T he next afternoon, the phone rang shortly after Callie and her family had eaten lunch. Callie had her good hand in a sink of soapy water, where she was helping to place the dirty lunch dishes. Natalie, who was closest to the wall phone, answered it.
“Oh, sure,” she said into the receiver. “She’s right here.” Placing the phone against her chest, Natalie said, “Callie, it’s for
“All that really matters is that my dad is alive, and that he loves me,” Kwame said.
Callie’s eyes misted, but she tried not to let the tears fall. In that simple statement, her son was letting her know that he forgave her, that he was looking at the big picture.
It made Callie think once again about the letter her aunt had left her and her sisters. How her own mother had been in some kind of trouble and had fled. Couldn’t she have sat Callie down and reasonably explained to her what was going on? Explain that there was some sort of trouble, that she loved them and had to leave them for a while? Callie had been eight. Old enough to get the jist of a serious conversation.
The very fact that Kwame was being so forgiving made it clear that kids simply needed to be told the truth. Adults often doubted a child’s ability to handle the truth, but children were stronger than people thought.
Thinking of their mother, Callie felt the familiar anxiety. The pain. That sense of abandonment that was like nothing else.
And then she remembered Natalie’s comment. That if their mother knew better, she would have done better.
Natalie was ready to forgive, no question. But there had to be other ways to parent than to leave your kids in the dark in an effort to protect—
The thought died abruptly. Callie caught herself, and was ashamed. Maybe she ought to be more like Natalie, willing to forgive. Because hadn’t she kept her son in the dark regarding the truth about his father?
No, she hadn’t outright lied to Kwame, but she hadn’t been truthful either. Her son had been left to fill in the blanks, and had assumed that his father was dead.
While Callie could perhaps forgive her mother for keeping her secrets, what she wasn’t yet ready to forgive her for was the bigger crime: abandoning her and her sisters. The fact that she’d been in touch with their aunt for at least a few years meant she could have sent letters for her own daughters, if not called.
She had chosen to stay away.
That was what hurt the most.
And if she was still alive today, yet had stayed away all these years…well, how could her mother explain that in a way that would absolve her guilt?
Yes, Callie had made her share of mistakes. She hadn’t been a perfect parent. But as she pulled Kwame against her body, she knew that she’d done at least one thing right. She had raised a warm and caring young man.
“When do I see Dad again?” Kwame asked.
“Um, I don’t know. Maybe tomorrow?”
“When do we go back to Florida?”
“I haven’t booked our return trip home,” Callie said.
Kwame smiled. “Good.”
“Good?” Callie questioned.
“I want to spend as much time with Dad as possible.”
Callie nodded. “Of course. And you will.”
“Can we call Dad now?” Kwame asked.
“He’s working, remember?”
Kwame frowned slightly.
“Don’t worry. We’ll call him in the morning.”
“Okay.” Kwame rose from the bed. “I’m gonna go back downstairs. I have to finish my game.”
“You do that.”
And as Kwame bounded out of the room, Callie realized her conundrum. She couldn’t simply leave and head back to Florida, go on with her life as she had known it.
Because like it or not, her life once again included Nigel.
And in a way that she would never have anticipated ten years ago.
Ten years ago, she always thought that if she and Nigel were to have children, they would be a married, loving couple.
But life didn’t always work out the way a person planned. Callie knew that better than anyone else.
Chapter 9
T he next afternoon, the phone rang shortly after Callie and her family had eaten lunch. Callie had her good hand in a sink of soapy water, where she was helping to place the dirty lunch dishes. Natalie, who was closest to the wall phone, answered it.
“Oh, sure,” she said into the receiver. “She’s right here.” Placing the phone against her chest, Natalie said, “Callie, it’s for
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