across the low table in the center of the room, one of which has tipped over and soaked a portion of the pink business insert of the Evening Standard. Chewed broadsheet pages lie stiffly against the back of the sofa, fanned out like a tramp’s bed. I just look in and turn away.
Elaine is in the downstairs foyer, slouched against the wall. She is inspecting her nails. They are clear-varnished, neatly manicured.
“Fancy a postmortem drink?” she asks.
“Oh, no. No, thanks. I’m just going to go home. Watch some TV.”
“Just like the others.”
“Just like the others. They’ve all gone home, have they?”
“Mmmm.”
“How come you’re still here?” I ask. “I thought you finished an hour ago.”
“Met an old friend. Went for a coffee and forgot my bag.”
A lie.
“Tomorrow, then,” I tell her unconvincingly. “Tomorrow we’ll all go out.”
“Yeah,” she says. “Tomorrow.”
DAY TWO
The morning of the second day is taken up with more written papers, beginning at nine o’clock.
The In-Tray Exercise is a short, sharp, sixty-minute test of nerve, a lengthy document assessing both the candidate’s ability to identify practical problems arising within the Civil Service and his capacity for taking rapid and decisive action to resolve them. The focus is on leadership, management skills, and the means to devolve responsibility and “prioritize” decisions. SIS is big on teamwork.
Most of us seem to cope okay: Ogilvy, Elaine, and Ann finish the test within the allocated time. But the Hobbit looks to have messed up. At his desk, his shoulders heave and slump with sighing frustration, and he writes only occasionally, little halfhearted scribbles. He has not responded well to having his mind channeled like this: concision and structure are contrary to his nature. When Keith collects his answer sheet at the end of the exercise, it looks sparse and blotched with ink, the script of a cross-wired mind.
The Letter Writing Exercise, which takes us up to lunch, is more straightforward. A member of the public has sent a four-page letter to a Home Office minister complaining about a particular aspect of the legislation outlined in the In-Tray Exercise. We are asked to write a balanced, tactful reply, conscious of the government’s legal position, but firm in its intent not to cave in to outside pressure. The Hobbit seems to find this significantly easier: sitting there in his blue-black blazer with its cheap gold buttons, he is no longer a sweating, panting blob of panic. The letter allows for a degree of self-expression, for leaps of the imagination, and with these he is more comfortable. There is a general sense that we have all returned here today locked into a surer knowledge of how to proceed.
I have lunch for the second time at the National Gallery and again buy a ham and cheese sandwich, finding something comforting in the routine of this. Then the greater part of the final afternoon is taken up with more cognitive tests: Logical Reasoning, Verbal Organization, two Numerical Facility papers. Again there is not enough time, and again the tests are rigorous and probing. Yet, much of the nervousness and uncertainty of yesterday has disappeared. I know what’s required now. I can pace myself. It’s just a question of applying the mind.
At three thirty, I find Elaine in the common room, alone and drinking coffee. She is sitting on a radiator below one of the windows, her right leg lifted and resting on the arm of the sofa. Her skirt has ridden up to the midsection of her thighs, but she makes no attempt to cover herself, or to lower her leg when I come in.
“Nearly over,” she says.
I must look exhausted. I settle into one of the armchairs and sigh heavily.
“My brain is numb. Numb.”
Elaine nods in agreement. Bare-skinned thighs, no tights.
“You finished?”
“No,” she says. “One more.”
Our conversation is slow monosyllables. It feels as if we are talking like old
Elaine is in the downstairs foyer, slouched against the wall. She is inspecting her nails. They are clear-varnished, neatly manicured.
“Fancy a postmortem drink?” she asks.
“Oh, no. No, thanks. I’m just going to go home. Watch some TV.”
“Just like the others.”
“Just like the others. They’ve all gone home, have they?”
“Mmmm.”
“How come you’re still here?” I ask. “I thought you finished an hour ago.”
“Met an old friend. Went for a coffee and forgot my bag.”
A lie.
“Tomorrow, then,” I tell her unconvincingly. “Tomorrow we’ll all go out.”
“Yeah,” she says. “Tomorrow.”
DAY TWO
The morning of the second day is taken up with more written papers, beginning at nine o’clock.
The In-Tray Exercise is a short, sharp, sixty-minute test of nerve, a lengthy document assessing both the candidate’s ability to identify practical problems arising within the Civil Service and his capacity for taking rapid and decisive action to resolve them. The focus is on leadership, management skills, and the means to devolve responsibility and “prioritize” decisions. SIS is big on teamwork.
Most of us seem to cope okay: Ogilvy, Elaine, and Ann finish the test within the allocated time. But the Hobbit looks to have messed up. At his desk, his shoulders heave and slump with sighing frustration, and he writes only occasionally, little halfhearted scribbles. He has not responded well to having his mind channeled like this: concision and structure are contrary to his nature. When Keith collects his answer sheet at the end of the exercise, it looks sparse and blotched with ink, the script of a cross-wired mind.
The Letter Writing Exercise, which takes us up to lunch, is more straightforward. A member of the public has sent a four-page letter to a Home Office minister complaining about a particular aspect of the legislation outlined in the In-Tray Exercise. We are asked to write a balanced, tactful reply, conscious of the government’s legal position, but firm in its intent not to cave in to outside pressure. The Hobbit seems to find this significantly easier: sitting there in his blue-black blazer with its cheap gold buttons, he is no longer a sweating, panting blob of panic. The letter allows for a degree of self-expression, for leaps of the imagination, and with these he is more comfortable. There is a general sense that we have all returned here today locked into a surer knowledge of how to proceed.
I have lunch for the second time at the National Gallery and again buy a ham and cheese sandwich, finding something comforting in the routine of this. Then the greater part of the final afternoon is taken up with more cognitive tests: Logical Reasoning, Verbal Organization, two Numerical Facility papers. Again there is not enough time, and again the tests are rigorous and probing. Yet, much of the nervousness and uncertainty of yesterday has disappeared. I know what’s required now. I can pace myself. It’s just a question of applying the mind.
At three thirty, I find Elaine in the common room, alone and drinking coffee. She is sitting on a radiator below one of the windows, her right leg lifted and resting on the arm of the sofa. Her skirt has ridden up to the midsection of her thighs, but she makes no attempt to cover herself, or to lower her leg when I come in.
“Nearly over,” she says.
I must look exhausted. I settle into one of the armchairs and sigh heavily.
“My brain is numb. Numb.”
Elaine nods in agreement. Bare-skinned thighs, no tights.
“You finished?”
“No,” she says. “One more.”
Our conversation is slow monosyllables. It feels as if we are talking like old
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