A Mother's Secret by Amy Clipston Page A

never considered you a mistake, so don’t you ever think you are one. Do you understand?” She emphasized the words.
    “ Ya .” He nodded. “Does that mean you never wished you were married?”
    Carolyn contemplated the question. “ Ya , I would like to be married, but if it’s not in God’s plan for me, then I will be satisfied. I have something some women never have, and that’s a son like you. Some women never get the opportunity to have kinner .”
    “That’s true.” He was silent for a moment, as if he were contemplating something. “I don’t think you should rush into marriage with anyone. It’s for life, so you can’t change your mind after the wedding.”
    Carolyn smiled at her son. “You’re a smart bu .”
    He yawned. “It’s late. We better get to bed.”
    “You’re right.” Carolyn yawned in return.
    As they headed into the house for the night, Carolyn sent up a silent prayer asking God to guide her friendship with Saul. She then smiled as she sent up another prayer thanking God for her wonderful son.

EIGHT

    J oshua wiped his brow before lifting the hammer and bringing it down on the new post he was adding to the back pasture fence on Wednesday afternoon.
    “Josh,” Benjamin began as he held the post in place, “I want to ask you something.”
    “Go ahead.” Joshua let the hammer fall to the ground.
    “I’ve been working here for over a week now.” The boy’s voice was hesitant.
    “ Ya .” Joshua took a drink of water from the thermos he’d brought from the house. “What are you getting at?”
    “I’d like to do more than just shovel out stalls and fix fence posts.” Benjamin pointed toward the barns and stables. “I want to learn what you do.”
    Joshua studied the boy, impressed and surprised by his enthusiasm. “Really?”
    “ Ya , really.” Benjamin’s emphatic nod nearly knocked his hat off his head.
    “What do you want to learn?” Joshua prodded.
    “I want to learn how to train horses, how to shoe them, and everything else you do every day.”
    “Why do you want to learn everything I do?” Now Joshua was intrigued by the boy’s yearning for knowledge.
    Benjamin pushed his hat back and wiped his sweaty brow. “I like working here. It’s better than working on my family’s dairy farm. I think I want a farm like this when I’m older.”
    “Really?” Joshua placed the thermos on the ground and then picked up the hammer.
    “Yes, really.” Benjamin’s expression was determined, and Joshua was overwhelmed by the boy’s interest. Joshua had always dreamed of teaching his nephew everything he knew about horses, but that dream evaporated when Hannah took the boy out of the community and into the English world. Maybe this young man could become a surrogate nephew to him.
    “You do realize mucking the stalls is part of learning about the farm,” Joshua said. “By working in the stalls, you’re learning how to be around the horses.”
    “I know, but I want to learn more than just how to shovel manure.”
    “All right. Here’s the plan. After we finish this fence, I’ll show you how to brush and water the horses. Once you show me that you’ve mastered those two tasks, we’ll move on to more. Does that sound good?”
    Benjamin clapped his hands. “Great! I can’t wait.”
    While they finished working on the fence, Joshua contemplated his conversation with Benjamin. He had an overwhelming feeling that the boy wasn’t the one who had thrown the rock at his horse. He now wondered if Benjamin had been telling the truth and his older brothers had lied, which also could have been the reason Carolyn was so irritated during their first conversation. Maybe Carolyn knew the other boys were lying,and she was trying to convince her father to believe Benjamin. And that was also why she was so upset after Benjamin came home exhausted and filthy his first day at work.
    He pondered Carolyn Lapp. She was obviously very protective of Benjamin, which he found