A Merry Little Christmas
dozed off before you came home.” Her eyes deepened. “How sick is she, Jeremiah? Tell me the truth.”
    “It’s worse than any flu I’ve ever seen. She was shivering and sweating. She kept calling out for Peter. No matter how many times I told her he was in Dallas, she couldn’t get it through her head. She cried a lot about Tobias, and she kept saying things in Swahili.”
    “Poor Tabitha. We’ve got to get her family back here. I’ll talk to the president of Reynolds tomorrow. Somehow we’ll figure out a way. The college has benefactors and special funds. We can fly the Murayas home if we have to.”
    They sat in silence, comfortable together for the first time. Jeremiah leaned back in the chair and watched the glowing blaze cast a flicker of shadows on Lara’s face. She stared at the flames.
    “What’s the weather like?” she murmured.
    “Frightful,” he said. “The fire, however, is definitely delightful.”
    She smiled. “Well, I guess we have no choice but to let it snow.”
    “Actually, it’s been raining. And freezing.”
    “Uh-oh. I was planning to go Christmas shopping.”
    “I’m afraid you’re stuck,” Jeremiah chuckled. “My house is yours.”
    She glanced at him a moment, then turned away quickly. Again they lapsed into a quiet peace. Jeremiah tried to recall the last time he had felt so warm, so relaxed, so perfectly at home in his own house. There were no teenagers running up and down the stairs. No pizza delivery men ringing the doorbell. No cell phones warbling or televisions blaring. It was just Lara and the baby. And him.
    “I’m sorry,” he told her. “About tonight—banging on your door and ordering you around. And before—not wanting to take in the Murayas. After making so many mistakes in my early adulthood, I’ve tried to be a good father. A good man. But I’m probably pretty much the same guy I always was.”
    “Actually, you’ve changed a lot. You’re very different from the man I met a few weeks ago.”
    He looked at her in surprise. “How?”
    “You have an African family living on your property. You roasted a goat in your backyard. You ate Thanksgiving dinner at the I-House and brought your parents. You’re repairing Miss Ethel’s home. And now you’re sitting beside a fire with Tobias and me.”
    “That last part is my favorite.”
    She shifted in the chair. “The important thing is that you’re open. You’ve reached out to people. And you’ve let people in.”
    “What about you?”
    “I’ve always reached out.”
    “Not to me. You won’t touch me, and you won’t let me near. Your walls are so high I don’t stand a chance of getting over.”
    “You don’t have to. I’m already inside. See? Here I am in your living room.”
    He shook his head. “You did everything in your power to keep from coming over here to help the boys and me.”
    “I have to maintain a professional distance. I can’t get too involved personally with my students.”
    “I’m not your student, Lara. Why won’t you get involved with me?”
    She swallowed. “Why would you want me to? Jeremiah, you can have anyone. Melissa or whoever you choose. I’m not available.”
    Once again, he knew a sickening thud in the pit of his stomach. “It’s because I’m divorced, isn’t it? I have too much baggage. The boys, the years alone, the failed marriage.”
    “We both have baggage. I just don’t think yours matches mine. I spent six years wearing the engagement ring of a man who didn’t have time for me. It was long ago, but it’s still very real. He worked for the famine relief agency that had hired me, and we met in France. He was with the home office. He trotted around the globe, stopping now and then to remind me that I was in love with him. Then away he went again. Alone, I earned my doctorate and started working at Reynolds, and then suddenly one day I woke up. I realized he wasn’t ever going to make a life with me, and that was okay. I didn’t want to be

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