yet if I should take it directly to someone, or if I should return it anonymously.
My amber tingles in my back pocket as I reach the dining hall door. I thought my brief journey back in time had ruined it, but it started working again during the night. I pull it out and read the latest message from Zed.
Please let me know you’re okay. I don’t know what you’re mixed up in, but you know I’m here for you if you need my help.
With an annoyed huff, I lean against the wall outside the dining hall and quickly scribble a reply with my stylus.
What I’m mixed up in? What about what you’re mixed up in? Drinking and playing games with dangerous Underground people. Is that a recent development, or have I just never known about that side of you?
Like I never knew about your girlfriend , I add silently, a dull ache settling in my chest. I haven’t had much spare thinking time recently, but in the moments when my mind hasn’t been occupied with Guild history or potions details or fighting tactics, it’s turned—annoyingly—to Zed. I know I stand no chance with him, but I wonder if, some time in the future, he might see me differently.
Stop being an idiot. Forget him and move on.
Attempting to take my own advice, I drop my amber into my bag and walk into the noisy dining hall. It’s about half full. Most of the occupants appear to be trainees, but I spot some mentors and a few older guardians. I’m about to walk to the table where Perry, Gemma and Ned are seated, but then I spot Saskia two tables away from them. The ache of Zed-rejection morphs into the burning heat of anger. I march across the room, my fingernails pressing into my palms as I clench my fists.
Saskia takes a sip of something from a mug before noticing me. Her eyebrows jump up in surprise as she lowers the mug. “Oh, look who survived initiation.”
I’d love to slap her but I manage to hold myself back. “You nearly got me killed.”
“What? Me?” She pretends to look hurt. “I would never do anything like that.”
“I could have you expelled for what you did.”
“Oh, well, you know all about expulsion, don’t you. I guess I should be afraid.”
Angry images flicker at the edge of my mind, threatening to break free. I force them back. “When exactly do you plan to grow up, Saskia? In a year’s time we’ll all have graduated. We’ll be working here. We’ll be professionals . Are you still going to act like a five-year-old then? Are you still going to attempt to sabotage the people you’re meant to be working beside , not against?”
Saskia looks around at the other fifth-years at her table. “Not all of them. Probably just you.”
“ I’m not your enemy ,” I force out between my teeth. “I’m here for the same reason you are: to save people. To stop criminals. To see justice served.”
I spin around and head for Perry’s table, only realizing now how quiet the dining hall has become. Keeping my eyes on the empty space next to Gemma, I move as quickly as I can without running. I climb over the bench and sit as Perry starts clapping. “Well done. That was quite a speech. Here, have a cinnamon twist.” He removes one from Gemma’s plate and places it in front of me.
“Does Saskia really have to be so childish?” I ask. “I know she’s annoyed that I didn’t have to start in first year like everyone else, but haven’t I proved that I put in the work, even if it didn’t happen here ?”
“It’s more than that,” Ned says, staring into his mug as though he finds the contents fascinating.
“More?”
“The truth is,” Perry says, “she feels threatened by you. She’s worried about her position at the top.”
“The top of what? What position?” Perry and Gemma look at me like I’m stupid. Even Ned lifts his gaze. “Oh, wait, you mean the rankings ? Why in all fae would I be a threat to her?”
I receive another are-you-really-that-slow look from Perry. “You’re Ryn Larkenwood’s
My amber tingles in my back pocket as I reach the dining hall door. I thought my brief journey back in time had ruined it, but it started working again during the night. I pull it out and read the latest message from Zed.
Please let me know you’re okay. I don’t know what you’re mixed up in, but you know I’m here for you if you need my help.
With an annoyed huff, I lean against the wall outside the dining hall and quickly scribble a reply with my stylus.
What I’m mixed up in? What about what you’re mixed up in? Drinking and playing games with dangerous Underground people. Is that a recent development, or have I just never known about that side of you?
Like I never knew about your girlfriend , I add silently, a dull ache settling in my chest. I haven’t had much spare thinking time recently, but in the moments when my mind hasn’t been occupied with Guild history or potions details or fighting tactics, it’s turned—annoyingly—to Zed. I know I stand no chance with him, but I wonder if, some time in the future, he might see me differently.
Stop being an idiot. Forget him and move on.
Attempting to take my own advice, I drop my amber into my bag and walk into the noisy dining hall. It’s about half full. Most of the occupants appear to be trainees, but I spot some mentors and a few older guardians. I’m about to walk to the table where Perry, Gemma and Ned are seated, but then I spot Saskia two tables away from them. The ache of Zed-rejection morphs into the burning heat of anger. I march across the room, my fingernails pressing into my palms as I clench my fists.
Saskia takes a sip of something from a mug before noticing me. Her eyebrows jump up in surprise as she lowers the mug. “Oh, look who survived initiation.”
I’d love to slap her but I manage to hold myself back. “You nearly got me killed.”
“What? Me?” She pretends to look hurt. “I would never do anything like that.”
“I could have you expelled for what you did.”
“Oh, well, you know all about expulsion, don’t you. I guess I should be afraid.”
Angry images flicker at the edge of my mind, threatening to break free. I force them back. “When exactly do you plan to grow up, Saskia? In a year’s time we’ll all have graduated. We’ll be working here. We’ll be professionals . Are you still going to act like a five-year-old then? Are you still going to attempt to sabotage the people you’re meant to be working beside , not against?”
Saskia looks around at the other fifth-years at her table. “Not all of them. Probably just you.”
“ I’m not your enemy ,” I force out between my teeth. “I’m here for the same reason you are: to save people. To stop criminals. To see justice served.”
I spin around and head for Perry’s table, only realizing now how quiet the dining hall has become. Keeping my eyes on the empty space next to Gemma, I move as quickly as I can without running. I climb over the bench and sit as Perry starts clapping. “Well done. That was quite a speech. Here, have a cinnamon twist.” He removes one from Gemma’s plate and places it in front of me.
“Does Saskia really have to be so childish?” I ask. “I know she’s annoyed that I didn’t have to start in first year like everyone else, but haven’t I proved that I put in the work, even if it didn’t happen here ?”
“It’s more than that,” Ned says, staring into his mug as though he finds the contents fascinating.
“More?”
“The truth is,” Perry says, “she feels threatened by you. She’s worried about her position at the top.”
“The top of what? What position?” Perry and Gemma look at me like I’m stupid. Even Ned lifts his gaze. “Oh, wait, you mean the rankings ? Why in all fae would I be a threat to her?”
I receive another are-you-really-that-slow look from Perry. “You’re Ryn Larkenwood’s
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