A Christmas Dance by Alissa Johnson

“What is this about, Patience? Is it your father? Has his illness taken a turn for the worse?”
    “No, he is the same.”
    “Is it. . .Patience. . .it’s not catching, is it?” Surely it wasn’t something she could have caught. He’d never once considered the possibility. The Meldrins had more sense than that, didn’t they? “You’re not. . .”
    She glanced up at him for the first time. “No. No, I’m quite well.”
    The rush of relief nearly made him dizzy. “Then what is it? Have you had a falling out with the Caroline or Mrs. Meldrin?”
    She shook her head, but still couldn’t meet his eyes. “No. Leaving is entirely my decision.”
    “I see.” He scowled at her. “No, I don’t. Tell me why.”
    “I. . .I’ve reasons.”
    “What are they?”
    “They’re complicated.”
    His mouth hooked up in a humorless smile. “That’s a very uncreative way of saying you’ll not tell me.”
    She tossed her hands up in frustration. “We. . .we’re a burden to them here. We’ll be a burden to them in the country as well, but more so in London.”
    “The Meldrins can well afford the burden of keeping you and your father in London for another fortnight.”
    “What burdens Mr. Meldrin
can
afford, and what burdens he should have to carry are two separate matters.”
    He hated that she made a sound point. Hated more that he could think of nothing to say that might change her mind. . .except perhaps an offer of marriage. She couldn’t leave him if they were bound by an engagement. And he bloody well didn’t want her leaving.
    The words “marry me” hovered on the tip of his tongue. He bit them back.
    Only a rash fool would propose marriage to a woman after such a brief courtship. These sorts of things took time, and thought, and planning.
    He had a plan, damn it
.
    Another fortnight of coming to know each other, a visit to the Meldrin estate after the holidays, a conversation with Mr. Meldrin, or her father if he was well enough. And if those steps in his plan went well then, and only then, would it be appropriate to extend an offer of marriage.
    “Is there nothing I can do to convince you to stay?”
    She shook her head.
    “Then there is nothing left to be said.” He stared at her for several long moments, and though he wasn’t aware of it at the time, later he would realize he used those moments to memorize every detail of her face.
    She dropped her gaze again and turned away. “I have to go.”
    “Safe journey, Patience.”
    He watched her move quickly to the door. And then she was gone. A tickle of something that felt uncomfortably like panic skittered along his spine. Just like that, the woman had walked out of his life. She hadn’t even offered a proper goodbye. Then again, neither had he. “Bloody hell.”
    They should have a proper goodbye, damn it. He headed for the door, determined to remedy the oversight. He knew it was irrational, perhaps even a little desperate. But he bloody well didn’t care.
    He’d taken no more than a step when the door swung open again, admitting Mr. Meldrin. The older man took one look at William and shook his head. “It won’t do you any good to go after her right now.”
    “I’m not. . .” William swore under his breath and fisted his hands at his sides. “You’re certain?”
    Mr. Meldrin nodded as he closed the door behind him. “Girl’s as stubborn as they come.”
    “Stubborn,” William repeated. The panic had begun to dull into a sick empty feeling.
    “As her father.”
    He wouldn’t have guessed it until that night. “I’d have learned that for myself, with a little more time.”
    “And she’ll learn to trust you, with a little more time.”
    “Time we no longer have.” He turned and looked at Mr. Meldrin. “Trust me with what? What is she hiding?”
    “Nothing so terrible, in my opinion.” Mr. Meldrin shook his head. “But then, our own troubles always seem more consequential than they do to those around us.” He