outside.
“Point taken. I’ll stick with my antibacterial and body wash though.”
“Whatever. Just hurry. I’ll pick out an outfit for you.”
“Can you hand me my antibacterial and body wash? They’re in the small front pouch of my luggage.” She retrieved it, dousing her left hand with a pile of the clear gel. The room instantly scented of rubbing alcohol supported by a linger ing hospital-like scent. She handed me the bottles before rubbing the liquid all over her hands, wrists and forearms.
“A vamp germaphobe,” I smirked. “Who would have thought?” I chuckled lightly.
“It’s not like I’m OCD about it, but I do like to be clean and be in clean.”
“Ok. Well, I’m going to get clean.” She shooed me towards the bathroom.
Twenty minutes later I felt almost new. The memory of today would haunt me for a while, just like all the other deaths I’d witnessed, but at least I had no physical reminders.
I tried not to relate Matteo’s violent end to my parents’. It was just as abrupt for them though too. Perhaps the most traumatic was my mom’s though. I’ll never forget the scene I walked into: my mother lifeless on the bathroom floor, a dart in her chest and my father’s blood dripping all over her face and upper body. My dad hovered over her, offering her all the protection he humanly could, sacrificing his lifeline of blood in an effort to save her. The razor blade was shaking in his hand, lines criss-crossing up his underarm from his wrist to his elbow. His cries bellowed from him and echoed off the tile; his cry was soulful and haunting. All of him was in it, every ounce of despair released in either blood or tears.
I shook my head wiping the steam off the mirror. I looked at the girl reflecting back at me. My hair clung to my shoulders, back and chest. Despite a flawless complexion, I could still see the shadows beneath my eyes aging me.
“Lex!” Gabi banged on the door. “Did you drown in there?”
“I’ll be out in a sec.” I took a deep steadying breath and opened the door.
“The dogs, I mean guys, are nipping at me to check on you.” I smiled at the annoyance in her tone. She was sure to say it loud enough for their sensitive ears to hear even a few rooms down. “Anyways, so I picked out this super cute chocolate sweater dress and cream colored tights with your pearl necklace and earrings and your navy blue suede pumps. She laid out the outfit on the bed, accessories and all and was rechecking her decision. “God I envy your figure. I wish I could wear this outfit.”
“You could. I would just make the dress a little longer to hit just above your knees.”
“I love it, but this type of material adds bulk to my already bulky frame. It’s just all wrong. I love the idea of it though.” I heard the longing in her voice.
“If it makes you feel better, I know how you feel, or at least I did. I used to watch Mel dress in her size zero designer duds while I bummed around in oversized tees and hoodies with jeans.”
“No offense Lex, but I don’t give a crap about you understanding or not because right now I’m looking at a skinny you and a bloated me who will never receive the miracle you did.” She handed me the clothes and walked out the door.
I’d hit a nerve. I knew first-hand how sensitive an issue weight was. I remember Mel offering me compliments, suggestions, encouragement and acceptance, but it didn’t change how I felt. In fact, it sometimes made it worse. Jealousy was my constant friend through all of middle school, despite her best intentions. And I did receive a miracle many would argue I didn’t deserve, but I couldn’t change that. I was grateful that my fat curse was over, but I paid the price in other ways.
I got dressed and wrapped my hair in a bun atop my head. The second I opened the front door the guys were there staring at me. I began to fidget, their intense gazes making me feel like I was under a microscope. “Um, you guys ready to
“Point taken. I’ll stick with my antibacterial and body wash though.”
“Whatever. Just hurry. I’ll pick out an outfit for you.”
“Can you hand me my antibacterial and body wash? They’re in the small front pouch of my luggage.” She retrieved it, dousing her left hand with a pile of the clear gel. The room instantly scented of rubbing alcohol supported by a linger ing hospital-like scent. She handed me the bottles before rubbing the liquid all over her hands, wrists and forearms.
“A vamp germaphobe,” I smirked. “Who would have thought?” I chuckled lightly.
“It’s not like I’m OCD about it, but I do like to be clean and be in clean.”
“Ok. Well, I’m going to get clean.” She shooed me towards the bathroom.
Twenty minutes later I felt almost new. The memory of today would haunt me for a while, just like all the other deaths I’d witnessed, but at least I had no physical reminders.
I tried not to relate Matteo’s violent end to my parents’. It was just as abrupt for them though too. Perhaps the most traumatic was my mom’s though. I’ll never forget the scene I walked into: my mother lifeless on the bathroom floor, a dart in her chest and my father’s blood dripping all over her face and upper body. My dad hovered over her, offering her all the protection he humanly could, sacrificing his lifeline of blood in an effort to save her. The razor blade was shaking in his hand, lines criss-crossing up his underarm from his wrist to his elbow. His cries bellowed from him and echoed off the tile; his cry was soulful and haunting. All of him was in it, every ounce of despair released in either blood or tears.
I shook my head wiping the steam off the mirror. I looked at the girl reflecting back at me. My hair clung to my shoulders, back and chest. Despite a flawless complexion, I could still see the shadows beneath my eyes aging me.
“Lex!” Gabi banged on the door. “Did you drown in there?”
“I’ll be out in a sec.” I took a deep steadying breath and opened the door.
“The dogs, I mean guys, are nipping at me to check on you.” I smiled at the annoyance in her tone. She was sure to say it loud enough for their sensitive ears to hear even a few rooms down. “Anyways, so I picked out this super cute chocolate sweater dress and cream colored tights with your pearl necklace and earrings and your navy blue suede pumps. She laid out the outfit on the bed, accessories and all and was rechecking her decision. “God I envy your figure. I wish I could wear this outfit.”
“You could. I would just make the dress a little longer to hit just above your knees.”
“I love it, but this type of material adds bulk to my already bulky frame. It’s just all wrong. I love the idea of it though.” I heard the longing in her voice.
“If it makes you feel better, I know how you feel, or at least I did. I used to watch Mel dress in her size zero designer duds while I bummed around in oversized tees and hoodies with jeans.”
“No offense Lex, but I don’t give a crap about you understanding or not because right now I’m looking at a skinny you and a bloated me who will never receive the miracle you did.” She handed me the clothes and walked out the door.
I’d hit a nerve. I knew first-hand how sensitive an issue weight was. I remember Mel offering me compliments, suggestions, encouragement and acceptance, but it didn’t change how I felt. In fact, it sometimes made it worse. Jealousy was my constant friend through all of middle school, despite her best intentions. And I did receive a miracle many would argue I didn’t deserve, but I couldn’t change that. I was grateful that my fat curse was over, but I paid the price in other ways.
I got dressed and wrapped my hair in a bun atop my head. The second I opened the front door the guys were there staring at me. I began to fidget, their intense gazes making me feel like I was under a microscope. “Um, you guys ready to
Similar Books
