stared at one another.
“Darn!” muttered Francine. “Really bad line. It sounded like he said his granny had trapped him in the attic.”
Jermaine looked at me. I looked at him. Granny must have turned into a zombie. That scratch was a bite all along. She didn’t want to tell anyone. This was bad.
Then I had a thought. “Hey! Kids will be eating those cheeseburgers!” See, we get recess and lunch in one period at my school. Our class had free time from 11:20 to 11:50, then a half-hour lunch. But the younger kids got lunch first, then free time. They’d be in the cafeteria right now. My sister might be eating a zombie-causing cheeseburger.
“The cafeteria, NOW !” I yelled.
I rushed through the hallways to get to Honor and tear the ghoulburger out of her mouth. Francine was just behind me, and Jermaine too. Mr. Ferich, who teaches sixth grade, yelled, “No running in the corridor!” but I took no notice. I barged through the big double doors and out onto the walkway. Ihauled open the door to the cafeteria. All the little kids from grades one to three were there. Some were sitting down already. Most were still in line getting served. I saw a kid picking the lettuce off his cheeseburger, so I grabbed his plate and flung it away. He looked at me like you’d expect him to look at someone who just threw away his lunch. “Heeeyyyy!!! No fair!!!”
Then I spotted Honor. She was at a table with her friends way at the other side of the room. What did she pick for lunch? Today they had a choice of boiled liver and mashed cabbage, creamed spinach casserole with canned peas, or the cheeseburger. Even if you knew the cheeseburger was leftover meatloaf, you’d pick it over the other two.
She waved at me. I ran forward.
I couldn’t see her tray from here.
Now I could. Cheeseburger and fries. She had a fry in her hand.
I slid like I was going into fourth. The floor was pretty slick and I glided (is that a word?) on the side of my shoe and the side of my butt. Honor’s eyes were real big. I reached out and grabbed her whole plate,and then I crashed into the back wall of the cafeteria. Big crash. The teacher on lunch duty yelled. The kids were all shrieking, ’cause they’re little kids, you know. That’s what they do.
I saved my sister from Zombiedom. But there were a hundred cheeseburgers just waiting to turn students into the undead. How many kids had already bitten into their lunch patty? I didn’t know—
Jermaine jumped onto a table and took a deep breath. “Hey, everyone! This is an announcement!”
“From the principal,” added Francine. It wasn’t true, of course.
“From the principal!” shouted Jermaine. “Don’t eat your cheeseburger! It will cause you to become a zombie!”
There was an uproar. One kid near me stopped chewing and spit up onto his plate.
“It’s the same as the meatballs, which were the same as the meatloaf last week!”
Kids who didn’t spit out their food when they heard it would turn them into zombies started spitting now, and chugging chocolate milk like it was an antidote or something.
ZOMBIE TIP
There is no antidote to the zombie infection found in any cafeteria. Chocolate milk is delicious, but it will not save you from a future as a brain-sucking ghoul.
One boy pushed his cheeseburger to one side and just ate his French fries.
“What about the liver?” yelled another student. We ignored him because two teachers and Elsie the head lunch lady were coming toward us. They looked pretty mad. We bolted for the door.
Our work here was done. “Liver’s fine!” yelled Jermaine, ’cause he’s always a smart—you know what I mean.
40
We ran back to Francine’s classroom. She’d left the phone in there. Her teacher was still away, which was good for us.
“My teacher smokes about a carton of cigarettes every lunchtime,” said Francine. “She won’t be back ’til right before the bell rings.”
Then we argued about what to do next. Jermaine said we
“Darn!” muttered Francine. “Really bad line. It sounded like he said his granny had trapped him in the attic.”
Jermaine looked at me. I looked at him. Granny must have turned into a zombie. That scratch was a bite all along. She didn’t want to tell anyone. This was bad.
Then I had a thought. “Hey! Kids will be eating those cheeseburgers!” See, we get recess and lunch in one period at my school. Our class had free time from 11:20 to 11:50, then a half-hour lunch. But the younger kids got lunch first, then free time. They’d be in the cafeteria right now. My sister might be eating a zombie-causing cheeseburger.
“The cafeteria, NOW !” I yelled.
I rushed through the hallways to get to Honor and tear the ghoulburger out of her mouth. Francine was just behind me, and Jermaine too. Mr. Ferich, who teaches sixth grade, yelled, “No running in the corridor!” but I took no notice. I barged through the big double doors and out onto the walkway. Ihauled open the door to the cafeteria. All the little kids from grades one to three were there. Some were sitting down already. Most were still in line getting served. I saw a kid picking the lettuce off his cheeseburger, so I grabbed his plate and flung it away. He looked at me like you’d expect him to look at someone who just threw away his lunch. “Heeeyyyy!!! No fair!!!”
Then I spotted Honor. She was at a table with her friends way at the other side of the room. What did she pick for lunch? Today they had a choice of boiled liver and mashed cabbage, creamed spinach casserole with canned peas, or the cheeseburger. Even if you knew the cheeseburger was leftover meatloaf, you’d pick it over the other two.
She waved at me. I ran forward.
I couldn’t see her tray from here.
Now I could. Cheeseburger and fries. She had a fry in her hand.
I slid like I was going into fourth. The floor was pretty slick and I glided (is that a word?) on the side of my shoe and the side of my butt. Honor’s eyes were real big. I reached out and grabbed her whole plate,and then I crashed into the back wall of the cafeteria. Big crash. The teacher on lunch duty yelled. The kids were all shrieking, ’cause they’re little kids, you know. That’s what they do.
I saved my sister from Zombiedom. But there were a hundred cheeseburgers just waiting to turn students into the undead. How many kids had already bitten into their lunch patty? I didn’t know—
Jermaine jumped onto a table and took a deep breath. “Hey, everyone! This is an announcement!”
“From the principal,” added Francine. It wasn’t true, of course.
“From the principal!” shouted Jermaine. “Don’t eat your cheeseburger! It will cause you to become a zombie!”
There was an uproar. One kid near me stopped chewing and spit up onto his plate.
“It’s the same as the meatballs, which were the same as the meatloaf last week!”
Kids who didn’t spit out their food when they heard it would turn them into zombies started spitting now, and chugging chocolate milk like it was an antidote or something.
ZOMBIE TIP
There is no antidote to the zombie infection found in any cafeteria. Chocolate milk is delicious, but it will not save you from a future as a brain-sucking ghoul.
One boy pushed his cheeseburger to one side and just ate his French fries.
“What about the liver?” yelled another student. We ignored him because two teachers and Elsie the head lunch lady were coming toward us. They looked pretty mad. We bolted for the door.
Our work here was done. “Liver’s fine!” yelled Jermaine, ’cause he’s always a smart—you know what I mean.
40
We ran back to Francine’s classroom. She’d left the phone in there. Her teacher was still away, which was good for us.
“My teacher smokes about a carton of cigarettes every lunchtime,” said Francine. “She won’t be back ’til right before the bell rings.”
Then we argued about what to do next. Jermaine said we
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