Without Looking Back by Tabitha Suzuma Page B

with her head on Dad’s lap. Finally, even Louis was sitting down, his back against the wall, knees drawn up to his chest, too tired to stand up and shout any more. Dad explained it all from the very beginning: when he first heard he had lost the court case he had just wanted to die. Then, one sleepless night, he had come up with a plan. Initially he had thought of taking them back to Ireland, but then he realized that Ireland was the first place the police would start to look. So he had contacted his old university friend Meg, in London, and asked her if she could help him. She had said yes, and with her help he had started getting the paperwork underway. But then, last month, Maman had toldhim that he could see the children for one last weekend. From then on, the visits were going to be supervised in the court’s family centre. And so he had realized he was going to have to act immediately. Several weeks of frantic planning ensued, giving notice at the flat in Rueil and shipping belongings over to Meg’s house in London. Meg helped Dad obtain false ID. She also said they could rent her holiday farmhouse in the Lake District for as long as they needed. And so here they were.
    â€˜And when were you planning on telling us all this?’ Max asked him.
    â€˜I was going to tell you last Saturday, the night before you were due to go home. I was going to tell you everything, like I’ve done now, and give you the choice of staying with me here in England or returning to Paris. But then, at breakfast, Millie started asking if she could spend another week. And you did too, Max. And I chickened out. I thought,
If I stall for another week, maybe there’s more chance they’ll want to stay with me
. I never, ever reckoned on one of you seeing your face on a missing person’s poster. Oh, God . . .’
    Louis glared at him. ‘Well, you reckoned wrong.’
    â€˜So that’s why you took away my mobile phone,’ Max gasped. ‘And why you got Meg to cut our hair . . .’
    â€˜And why you wouldn’t let Millie phone Mum to tell her about her new room,’ Louis added.
    â€˜Yes,’ Dad said. ‘It was wrong. And horribly unfair on all three of you. But what else could I possibly have done?’
    â€˜You could have told us about the plan,’ Louis said. ‘You could have given us the choice of being involved, right from the beginning, instead of just snatching us like objects.’
    â€˜I thought about that, but the risk would have been too great,’ Dad replied. ‘You could have so easily let it slip, and even if you hadn’t, it would have been hard for all three of you to put on an act in front of Maman.’
    Louis thought about it and realized Dad was right. It would have been so easy to give the game away. Even if he had told them in the airport, someone might have overheard. ‘So what happens now?’ he asked.
    â€˜Now?’ Dad spread his hands. ‘Now it’s completely and entirely up to you.’
    Silence fell. Max bit his lip. ‘That’s not fair,’ he said softly.
    â€˜It’s not,’ Dad agreed, putting his head in his hands. ‘And I’m sorry. I’m so terribly sorry.’
    When they finally went to bed, a pale dawn was beginning to leak through the curtains. Dad carriedMillie up to her room and Louis fell face down on his bed, not even bothering to take off his shoes.
    When he awoke, the room was flooded with sunlight. The belt of his jeans cut into his side and his T-shirt stuck damply to his skin. He sat up groggily, the open curtains revealing a painful blue sky. Max was sitting cross-legged on his neatly made bed, playing a game on the laptop, his cropped brown hair wet from the shower. He glanced over at Louis. ‘Morning, dozey.’
    Louis sat on the edge of his bed, rubbing his eyes and running his fingers through his hair. ‘What time is it?’ he mumbled.
    â€˜Quarter past