I say. My heart does a little dance in my chest.
“Oh, Finny…” She looks upset all of a sudden.
“What?”
“I was wondering how long it would take.”
My heart trips again. “What do you mean?”
“I saw him sneaking out of your room that night, Finny,” she says quietly.
“Oh.” Forgot about that.
“And I haven’t seen you bring anyone else home since then.”
“Yeah,” I breathe, wincing, “I better get on that.”
“You like him.”
“No…” I draw out the word.
“Yes, you do.”
I bury my face in my hands. I groan. “I don’t know.” I look at her finally. “Tell me what I should do.”
She lies back beside me and we both stare up at the ceiling. She takes my hand and holds it and doesn’t say anything more. The soft texture of the gloves she always wears slips across my skin.
Her breaths go soft and even and I realize she’s asleep. I get out of her bed and steel my shoulders. I’m going to tell Tag that I can’t do this. I can’t be that girl.
I go to his room and lift my knuckles to knock.
“Don’t do it,” a voice says through the crack in the door.
I freeze. “Don’t do what?”
“Don’t knock on my door.”
“Why not?”
“It’s a bad idea.”
“Okay.” I turn to go back to my own room.
The door opens and he sticks his head out. “I’ve been waiting for you to come and knock on my door so you can slap me for that kiss.”
“I wasn’t going to slap you.”
“I know.” He lays his forehead against the doorjamb of his room. “That’s what scares me.”
I nod, although I don’t understand at all. Not a bit. “Okay.”
I go to my room and he closes the door to his. I look back at his closed door for a moment.
What the fuck was that?
Finny
Music pounds in my veins like a heartbeat. It’s quick and consuming and I’m so damn hot that I’m turning myself on, and all I’m doing is dancing.
My personal security guard is standing over by the bar, pretending to nurse on a Jack and Coke, but I know it’s just diet soda. I don’t always need a security guard, but when I go out in a crowd and I’m alone, it’s best to have someone to help if things go bad. Jason’s gaze wanders around the room, and he scowls when he sees the guy I’m dancing with get a little too close. He starts to get up, but I shake my head at him. He narrows his eyes at me in a silent question.
No, I don’t need for you to come and pull him off me. This is not the one I want. The one I want smells like baby spit-up and talcum powder.
“You want to go to my place?” the guy asks, his mouth close to my ear.
I shake my head. “I just want to dance!”
Before Tag, I would have said yes to him. I would go and not think twice about it. I might come twice. Maybe more if he’s any good, but I wouldn’t even have to think about it. Yes, I might orgasm. But something tells me I would still feel empty inside after I get home. I’d shower off the scent and the feel of sex, and then I’d wrap my arms around my pillow and fall asleep.
The live band stops playing and we all clap.
“We’re taking a five minute break,” someone says quietly into the mic.
“Thanks for the dance,” I say over my shoulder. The guy clutches his chest like I’ve stabbed him, but I walk away. I start toward the bar so that I can get something cool to drink.
Jason, my personal bodyguard, pretends like he doesn’t know me, so I lean into his side. “So, are you ever going to fuck me or what?” I smile and bat my lashes at him.
He grins a sideways kind of smile. “I don’t think my wife would appreciate it, Fin, but thank you for thinking of me.” He rolls his eyes and sticks his tongue out at me. Jason is pushing fifty, and he has been happily married for twenty-five of those years. He mumbles something about jailbait as a scantily clad young woman walks by us.
“How’s Norma?” I ask.
“She’s pissed at me. Apparently, I was supposed to have been a mind reader or some
“Oh, Finny…” She looks upset all of a sudden.
“What?”
“I was wondering how long it would take.”
My heart trips again. “What do you mean?”
“I saw him sneaking out of your room that night, Finny,” she says quietly.
“Oh.” Forgot about that.
“And I haven’t seen you bring anyone else home since then.”
“Yeah,” I breathe, wincing, “I better get on that.”
“You like him.”
“No…” I draw out the word.
“Yes, you do.”
I bury my face in my hands. I groan. “I don’t know.” I look at her finally. “Tell me what I should do.”
She lies back beside me and we both stare up at the ceiling. She takes my hand and holds it and doesn’t say anything more. The soft texture of the gloves she always wears slips across my skin.
Her breaths go soft and even and I realize she’s asleep. I get out of her bed and steel my shoulders. I’m going to tell Tag that I can’t do this. I can’t be that girl.
I go to his room and lift my knuckles to knock.
“Don’t do it,” a voice says through the crack in the door.
I freeze. “Don’t do what?”
“Don’t knock on my door.”
“Why not?”
“It’s a bad idea.”
“Okay.” I turn to go back to my own room.
The door opens and he sticks his head out. “I’ve been waiting for you to come and knock on my door so you can slap me for that kiss.”
“I wasn’t going to slap you.”
“I know.” He lays his forehead against the doorjamb of his room. “That’s what scares me.”
I nod, although I don’t understand at all. Not a bit. “Okay.”
I go to my room and he closes the door to his. I look back at his closed door for a moment.
What the fuck was that?
Finny
Music pounds in my veins like a heartbeat. It’s quick and consuming and I’m so damn hot that I’m turning myself on, and all I’m doing is dancing.
My personal security guard is standing over by the bar, pretending to nurse on a Jack and Coke, but I know it’s just diet soda. I don’t always need a security guard, but when I go out in a crowd and I’m alone, it’s best to have someone to help if things go bad. Jason’s gaze wanders around the room, and he scowls when he sees the guy I’m dancing with get a little too close. He starts to get up, but I shake my head at him. He narrows his eyes at me in a silent question.
No, I don’t need for you to come and pull him off me. This is not the one I want. The one I want smells like baby spit-up and talcum powder.
“You want to go to my place?” the guy asks, his mouth close to my ear.
I shake my head. “I just want to dance!”
Before Tag, I would have said yes to him. I would go and not think twice about it. I might come twice. Maybe more if he’s any good, but I wouldn’t even have to think about it. Yes, I might orgasm. But something tells me I would still feel empty inside after I get home. I’d shower off the scent and the feel of sex, and then I’d wrap my arms around my pillow and fall asleep.
The live band stops playing and we all clap.
“We’re taking a five minute break,” someone says quietly into the mic.
“Thanks for the dance,” I say over my shoulder. The guy clutches his chest like I’ve stabbed him, but I walk away. I start toward the bar so that I can get something cool to drink.
Jason, my personal bodyguard, pretends like he doesn’t know me, so I lean into his side. “So, are you ever going to fuck me or what?” I smile and bat my lashes at him.
He grins a sideways kind of smile. “I don’t think my wife would appreciate it, Fin, but thank you for thinking of me.” He rolls his eyes and sticks his tongue out at me. Jason is pushing fifty, and he has been happily married for twenty-five of those years. He mumbles something about jailbait as a scantily clad young woman walks by us.
“How’s Norma?” I ask.
“She’s pissed at me. Apparently, I was supposed to have been a mind reader or some
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