tell me how pickles are made? Yes, Bebe.”
“In London,” said Bebe.
“I suppose they make some pickles in London,” said Mrs. Jewls. “Okay, let’s start again. Calvin, what’s the capital of England?”
“Could you write England on the board?” asked Calvin. “I can do a lot better when I can see the question.”
Mrs. Jewls wrote England on the board.
“Oh, okay,” said Calvin, now that he saw the question. “The capital of England is E.”
“Yes, that’s one capital of England,” Mrs. Jewls had to admit. “Okay, I will say it one more time. The capital of England is London.”
“Isn’t that where they make all the pickles?” asked Jenny.
“No, they don’t make all the pickles in London,” explained Allison. “Just eleven.”
“Well, where do they make the rest of the pickles?” asked Stephen.
“Shut up!” shouted Mrs. Jewls. “Well, that does it. You’re all staying inside for recess!”
Everyone stared at her. Mrs. Jewls had never told anyone to shut up. It was against the class rules for anyone to use that expression. If you did, you had to write your name on the blackboard under the word DISCIPLINE.
Mrs. Jewls put her hand over her mouth, then took it away. “Oh dear, I’m very sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what came over me.”
She wrote her own name on the blackboard under the word DISCIPLINE.
“Perhaps you’ll learn the lesson better if you write it down,” she suggested. “Everyone please take out a piece of paper and a pickle.”
Everybody laughed.
“Pencil!” snapped Mrs. Jewls. “I meant to say pencil. It just came out pickle.”
“I didn’t know pickles came from pencils,” said Jenny. “I thought they came from cucumbers.”
“I thought they came from London,” said Todd.
Mrs. Jewls made an ugly face. “Todd, didn’t I just tell you to shut up?” she asked. She picked up her yardstick and held it over Todd’s head. “Well, answer me!” she demanded. “Didn’t I tell you to shut up?”
“Yes,” said Todd.
“How dare you talk back to me!” snapped Mrs. Jewls. “Didn’t I just tell you to shut up?”
Todd kept his mouth shut.
“Well, answer me!” she demanded.
Todd didn’t know what to do. He nodded his head.
“Keep still!” ordered Mrs. Jewls. “Now I don’t want you to say another word, is that clear?”
Todd stared at her.
“Is that clear?” she asked again.
“Yes,” Todd said meekly.
Mrs. Jewls slammed down the yardstick. Todd quickly moved out of the way. The yardstick banged against his desk and broke in half.
Mrs. Jewls stared at the eighteen inches she held in her hand. “Oh my goodness,” she said. “I’m sorry, Todd. I don’t know what’s the matter with me today. I must have gotten up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
She put a check next to her name under the word DISCIPLINE.
“Okay, let me try to make this very simple,” she said. “If I have seven cucumbers. And then I get four more cucumbers. And then I drop all the cucumbers in brine and take them to the capital of England. What do I have? How many? And where am I?”
“Huh?” said D.J.
“What?” asked John.
“Could you write the question on the board, please?” asked Rondi.
“Shut up!” Mrs. Jewls yelled a third time. In a mocking voice she said, “ ‘Could you write the question on the board, please?’ You kids think you are so cute! Well, we’ll see just how cute you really are.” She picked up the vat of brine from her desk. “How would you like it if I poured this on your heads? You won’t be so cute when you’re all shriveled up and covered with warts, like pickles!”
She walked up and down the aisles carrying the pickle juice and glaring at the children.
No one dared make a sound.
She stopped next to Leslie. “How about you, Leslie?” she asked. “How would you like pickled pigtails?”
Leslie trembled. Her pigtails wiggled.
g
g
“Well, I’m going to ask you three questions,
“In London,” said Bebe.
“I suppose they make some pickles in London,” said Mrs. Jewls. “Okay, let’s start again. Calvin, what’s the capital of England?”
“Could you write England on the board?” asked Calvin. “I can do a lot better when I can see the question.”
Mrs. Jewls wrote England on the board.
“Oh, okay,” said Calvin, now that he saw the question. “The capital of England is E.”
“Yes, that’s one capital of England,” Mrs. Jewls had to admit. “Okay, I will say it one more time. The capital of England is London.”
“Isn’t that where they make all the pickles?” asked Jenny.
“No, they don’t make all the pickles in London,” explained Allison. “Just eleven.”
“Well, where do they make the rest of the pickles?” asked Stephen.
“Shut up!” shouted Mrs. Jewls. “Well, that does it. You’re all staying inside for recess!”
Everyone stared at her. Mrs. Jewls had never told anyone to shut up. It was against the class rules for anyone to use that expression. If you did, you had to write your name on the blackboard under the word DISCIPLINE.
Mrs. Jewls put her hand over her mouth, then took it away. “Oh dear, I’m very sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what came over me.”
She wrote her own name on the blackboard under the word DISCIPLINE.
“Perhaps you’ll learn the lesson better if you write it down,” she suggested. “Everyone please take out a piece of paper and a pickle.”
Everybody laughed.
“Pencil!” snapped Mrs. Jewls. “I meant to say pencil. It just came out pickle.”
“I didn’t know pickles came from pencils,” said Jenny. “I thought they came from cucumbers.”
“I thought they came from London,” said Todd.
Mrs. Jewls made an ugly face. “Todd, didn’t I just tell you to shut up?” she asked. She picked up her yardstick and held it over Todd’s head. “Well, answer me!” she demanded. “Didn’t I tell you to shut up?”
“Yes,” said Todd.
“How dare you talk back to me!” snapped Mrs. Jewls. “Didn’t I just tell you to shut up?”
Todd kept his mouth shut.
“Well, answer me!” she demanded.
Todd didn’t know what to do. He nodded his head.
“Keep still!” ordered Mrs. Jewls. “Now I don’t want you to say another word, is that clear?”
Todd stared at her.
“Is that clear?” she asked again.
“Yes,” Todd said meekly.
Mrs. Jewls slammed down the yardstick. Todd quickly moved out of the way. The yardstick banged against his desk and broke in half.
Mrs. Jewls stared at the eighteen inches she held in her hand. “Oh my goodness,” she said. “I’m sorry, Todd. I don’t know what’s the matter with me today. I must have gotten up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
She put a check next to her name under the word DISCIPLINE.
“Okay, let me try to make this very simple,” she said. “If I have seven cucumbers. And then I get four more cucumbers. And then I drop all the cucumbers in brine and take them to the capital of England. What do I have? How many? And where am I?”
“Huh?” said D.J.
“What?” asked John.
“Could you write the question on the board, please?” asked Rondi.
“Shut up!” Mrs. Jewls yelled a third time. In a mocking voice she said, “ ‘Could you write the question on the board, please?’ You kids think you are so cute! Well, we’ll see just how cute you really are.” She picked up the vat of brine from her desk. “How would you like it if I poured this on your heads? You won’t be so cute when you’re all shriveled up and covered with warts, like pickles!”
She walked up and down the aisles carrying the pickle juice and glaring at the children.
No one dared make a sound.
She stopped next to Leslie. “How about you, Leslie?” she asked. “How would you like pickled pigtails?”
Leslie trembled. Her pigtails wiggled.
g
g
“Well, I’m going to ask you three questions,
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