fine cotton covering she could see the flushed areolae of her breasts. They had looked like that last night after Jake had kissed them. A tight ball of angry guilt exploded inside her.
How could she have behaved like that, let such a thing happen— wanted such a thing to happen, and to the extent that, if she had not suddenly remembered the danger that lay in having sex with someone without taking precautions against conception, this morning she could well have been waking up in Jake’s bed, not this one... In Jake’s bed...perhaps even in Jake’s arms...?
The feeling that swept over her appalled her. What was happening to her? Twenty-four hours ago, the last man she could ever have imagined as her lover had been Jake Lucas, and now... She didn’t want him as a lover now either, she told herself fiercely. All she wanted to do was to get up, get dressed and get away from here as quickly as she possibly could, so that she could forget that the whole thing had happened.
What had possessed her to break down in front of him like that...to tell him things she had never imagined she would ever share with anyone, to reveal to him emotions, fears, needs so private that she had thought she would never be able to express them to anyone?
And yet strangely it had been easy sharing them with Jake... He had made it easy.
Until that moment when she had remembered, realised what she was doing, and she had cried out to him her fear of conceiving another child that she might lose.
She closed her eyes, trying to blot out her memory of the look on his face.
Where was he now? Downstairs waiting for her to put in an appearance...so that he could question her?
Anxiously she looked towards the door and realised that her clothes were on a chair several feet away from the bed, neatly folded with a note propped up against them. The note read,
Had to go out for an hour. Made fresh coffee at 10.00 am. Aspirins in cupboard if needed.
Fresh coffee... She closed her eyes; she could almost smell it...taste its hot, reviving flavour. As for the aspirins... She grimaced to herself before swinging her feet on to the floor and then wincing as her head pounded painfully.
Her bedroom had its own bathroom, well equipped with everything that she might need, including a new toothbrush. Jake’s Mrs Lindow did her job very well, even if she didn’t like fresh flowers, Rosie admitted. A hot shower, followed by a final cold rinse that made her skin tingle and the breath lock in her throat, helped to bring her properly round from her deep sleep, a much deeper sleep than she ever seemed to enjoy in her own home.
The silk dress was remarkably uncreased, although Rosie grimaced a little at having to put on clothes she had already worn.
She also felt acutely aware of the fact that the dress was quite obviously not the kind of thing she would have worn for her normal daytime activities. It looked what it was, she decided fretfully as she hurriedly brushed her hair. A ‘going somewhere’ dress, totally unsuitable for something like yesterday’s party, and totally unsuitable for a Monday morning.
If only her car were outside and she could simply drive home. As it was she would have to ring for a taxi and hope that it arrived before Jake did.
The thought of seeing him, of knowing what he was thinking...remembering...made her shudder with self-loathing.
How could she have been so undisciplined, so uncontrolled?
She had been under a lot of stress recently, both from her work and from far more personal emotions. Look at the way she had reacted to Chrissie’s announcement about the baby.
The baby... She tensed abruptly, forgetting her desire to escape before Jake returned.
She had told Jake about her baby. Or as good as. How could she have done that? Why had she done it?
The rest of the evening, the fact that she had both wanted and encouraged Jake to make love to her, and the uneasy fear-cum-anger those memories had been causing her, suddenly faded to
How could she have behaved like that, let such a thing happen— wanted such a thing to happen, and to the extent that, if she had not suddenly remembered the danger that lay in having sex with someone without taking precautions against conception, this morning she could well have been waking up in Jake’s bed, not this one... In Jake’s bed...perhaps even in Jake’s arms...?
The feeling that swept over her appalled her. What was happening to her? Twenty-four hours ago, the last man she could ever have imagined as her lover had been Jake Lucas, and now... She didn’t want him as a lover now either, she told herself fiercely. All she wanted to do was to get up, get dressed and get away from here as quickly as she possibly could, so that she could forget that the whole thing had happened.
What had possessed her to break down in front of him like that...to tell him things she had never imagined she would ever share with anyone, to reveal to him emotions, fears, needs so private that she had thought she would never be able to express them to anyone?
And yet strangely it had been easy sharing them with Jake... He had made it easy.
Until that moment when she had remembered, realised what she was doing, and she had cried out to him her fear of conceiving another child that she might lose.
She closed her eyes, trying to blot out her memory of the look on his face.
Where was he now? Downstairs waiting for her to put in an appearance...so that he could question her?
Anxiously she looked towards the door and realised that her clothes were on a chair several feet away from the bed, neatly folded with a note propped up against them. The note read,
Had to go out for an hour. Made fresh coffee at 10.00 am. Aspirins in cupboard if needed.
Fresh coffee... She closed her eyes; she could almost smell it...taste its hot, reviving flavour. As for the aspirins... She grimaced to herself before swinging her feet on to the floor and then wincing as her head pounded painfully.
Her bedroom had its own bathroom, well equipped with everything that she might need, including a new toothbrush. Jake’s Mrs Lindow did her job very well, even if she didn’t like fresh flowers, Rosie admitted. A hot shower, followed by a final cold rinse that made her skin tingle and the breath lock in her throat, helped to bring her properly round from her deep sleep, a much deeper sleep than she ever seemed to enjoy in her own home.
The silk dress was remarkably uncreased, although Rosie grimaced a little at having to put on clothes she had already worn.
She also felt acutely aware of the fact that the dress was quite obviously not the kind of thing she would have worn for her normal daytime activities. It looked what it was, she decided fretfully as she hurriedly brushed her hair. A ‘going somewhere’ dress, totally unsuitable for something like yesterday’s party, and totally unsuitable for a Monday morning.
If only her car were outside and she could simply drive home. As it was she would have to ring for a taxi and hope that it arrived before Jake did.
The thought of seeing him, of knowing what he was thinking...remembering...made her shudder with self-loathing.
How could she have been so undisciplined, so uncontrolled?
She had been under a lot of stress recently, both from her work and from far more personal emotions. Look at the way she had reacted to Chrissie’s announcement about the baby.
The baby... She tensed abruptly, forgetting her desire to escape before Jake returned.
She had told Jake about her baby. Or as good as. How could she have done that? Why had she done it?
The rest of the evening, the fact that she had both wanted and encouraged Jake to make love to her, and the uneasy fear-cum-anger those memories had been causing her, suddenly faded to
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