Under the Jeweled Sky by Alison McQueen Page B

anything, I think it must have put him off the idea of marriage for ever, and you can see for yourself how it has affected me.” She flicked her eyes to the ceiling in acknowledgement of her own skittishness. “Who would have thought I’d get into such a state over a proposal? Poor Dad. He never talked about any of it. It was as though it never happened. I think he preferred to allow people to draw their own conclusions. We must have made a very odd pair.”
    â€œYou were a good daughter to have stayed with him for so long.”
    â€œHow could I not? I felt terribly responsible for him, and he so needed looking after. There were times when I thought I’d never see him smile again; that’s how bad it was. I have no doubt that I would still be there had he not insisted I stop mollycoddling him.”
    â€œQuite right too, otherwise we never would have met, would we? And then where would I be?” He picked up her hand. “You are everything a man could possibly want in a wife, Sophie. You’re pretty and funny and clever, and we could have such a wonderful life together.”
    â€œI don’t want to let you down,” she said.
    â€œHow could you possibly let me down? All you have to do is make a home, wherever we are, and stay by my side.” A thought passed across his mind, the same thought that had nagged at him since his walk home alone through the park last Sunday. “Sophie?”
    â€œYes?”
    â€œIs it the India posting that’s putting you off? I mean, I notice you never really talk about it.”
    â€œIt feels like a long time ago,” she said. “A different life, a different place. India is a whole other country now, warts and all. When I was first there, it was just one big melting pot, not that I ever really saw that much of it. That was the beauty of the place, I think. It was all the wonderful differences that made India what it was.”
    â€œDid you ever go to Delhi?”
    â€œNo,” she said. “Well, that’s not strictly true. We did pass though it, when we first went out, but I was still in my teens then and I hadn’t known what to expect and it was all rather overwhelming. I remember it being huge and utterly chaotic. I’d never seen anything like it.”
    â€œYou were there before Partition?”
    â€œYes, and during. My, what a terrible business that whole thing was. And now look what’s left. They’re still fighting, ten years later.”
    â€œThings have changed a lot since then,” Lucien said. “There’s no trouble in Delhi. All that’s way up in the north. Delhi is completely civilized now.” He cut into his steak again, dipping his knife in the mustard and buttering it yellow. “And the houses in the diplomatic districts are quite something.”
    Sophie smiled to herself. Delhi is civilized now . She wondered what he thought civilized meant, whether he thought it something simple like hot and cold running water and a well-cut suit, or whether he meant something deeper than that, like fairness and democracy and everybody having enough food to eat. Lucien noticed her looking at him.
    â€œAren’t you tempted to go back and see how it has changed?”
    â€œI don’t know. I hadn’t really thought about it.”
    Sophie toyed with her wine glass, twisting its stem, watching the candlelight reflected in the rich red Burgundy he had chosen. Something special, he had said. Of course she had thought about it. She had thought of little else. Could she go back to India? Could she really cope with it? With all the feelings and memories that would be bound to come back to her? She didn’t know.
    â€œThat’s a very serious expression you’re wearing all of a sudden,” Lucien said.
    â€œI’m sorry. My mind had wandered.”
    â€œTo India?”
    â€œYes.”
    â€œWas it so bad?”
    â€œNo.” She took up her fork,