Try Me On for Size by Stephanie Haefner Page A

real mess of his life and he had no idea how he would fix any of it. Someone was going to be unhappy. And it would most likely be him.
    “UNBELIEVABLE,” BRYN said after listening to Mia’s recount of her night. “He seemed so normal. Not assholey at all.”
    Penny sat by, eyes wide, jaw in her lap.
    “A liar,” Mia said, shaking her head. “Just like 90 percent of the male population. I think you guys got the only two respectable men in the state.”
    “Oh, come on. You haven’t dated one decent guy in your life?” Penny asked.
    “Nope. And Bryn can attest to that.”
    “To some degree,” she agreed. “But you’re super picky. No one is perfect and you let the tiniest quirks annoy you.”
    “I think sleeping with someone under an assumed identity is classified as a whole lot more than a ‘quirk.’ ”
    “True. But you’ve tossed away some fine men because of dirty socks on the floor and chewed fingernails.”
    “I refuse to settle and live my life dealing with things that annoy me.”
    Ryan . . . er . . . .Oliver hadn’t thrown his socks on her floor like all the other interviewees had. Well, accept for Logan. He’d worn flip-flops, which was a whole different irritation all together. But Oliver had folded his socks with his suit pants and placed them on her chair. And his nails were suitably clipped and filed, no jagged edges, no girlie manicure like Kyle. Stop thinking about Oliver!
    After he’d left her apartment the night before, an uncontrollable sadness crept into her otherwise furious heart. So, she’d allowed herself ten minutes to bawl her eyes out. When the pity party was over, she pushed him from her thoughts and added him to the pile of discarded men she had no use for.
    But damn it, her heart kept digging him out and bringing him back to her conscious mind. The thought of their encounters together had her wishing she’d taken home one of the new vibrators from the shop.
    “So, what do we do now?” Penny asked.
    “First of all, I call the real Ryan and find out what happened.” Mia reached for the phone, his resume sitting on the table in front of them. “If he’d shown up, none of this would be happening right now.”
    Three minutes later she hung up and tossed the résumé into the trash. “He stood me up to stay faithful to his girlfriend.”
    “See, there are good men out there.” Bryn gave her the smile she gave her kids when they needed to be coddled.
    “Hardly. The coward couldn’t even call to tell me he’d chickened out.” Mia fanned the other models’ photos across the break-room table. “Now we make our decision based on the other interviewees. We have two models to choose from.”
    “This guy’s cute,” Penny said and pointed to Kyle’s photo.
    “He is, and very suave with the ladies, but he is a bit immature. I can almost see him taking off and leaving us high and dry if some other opportunity comes along. That or a horny soccer mom.”
    Bryn’s eyebrows furrowed. “Huh?”
    “You don’t want to know.”
    “O . . . kay. So what about blondie here?” Bryn asked. “He’s hot, too.”
    “I liked Logan. And he’s got the reality show thing he’s working on. Who knows if it will actually come to fruition, but it could be a perk.”
    The women stared at the photos for a while, flipping between face shots and photos of their bodies and genitalia.
    “Well, you said Logan has the longer dick, so I vote for that.” Bryn was so blunt sometimes, but Mia secretly liked it. She often said what was on Mia’s mind.
    “I think he’s the better option, just for his maturity level. And yes, his length was a definite perk.”
    “Okay. It’s settled then,” Penny said. “We should get the process started. I already have posters and flyers ready to go. We just need to load the photos and add his name. Who’s gonna call and deliver the good news to him? And the bad news to everyone else?”
    Mia looked to Bryn. “I’ve done all the hard work so