Toxic by Alice Lingard Page A

myself!”
    Todd gently eased Ben off the sofa, sat in his place, and put an arm around Suzy.
    “Here.” He passed her a tissue.
    Through tearful eyes she turned to face him. “I'm sorry.”
    “Come on. You're upsetting Ben.”
    The dog was looking up at them with big sad eyes.
    “It's okay, boy.” Suzy said. “Want to go for a walk?”
    Ben barked his approval.
     
     
    **********
     
     
    Todd threw the ball into the sea; Ben charged in after it.
    “Where does he get all his energy from?” Todd said.
    “Must be the steak I gave him.”
    “What?” Todd looked horrified. “You gave him my steak?”
    “Just joking. Your steak is perfectly safe.”
    “Phew. For a minute there, I thought I was going to have to eat dog food.”
    “Come here.” Suzy pulled Todd's head down to her level, put her arms around his neck, and kissed him for the longest time.
    “What did I do to deserve that?”
    “These last few weeks here, with you and Ben, have been the best of my life,” Suzy said.
    “Me too.”
    “Are you just saying that?”
    “No. I'm deadly serious.”
    She took his hand, and they began to walk along the beach—taking it in turns to throw the ball for Ben.
    “I'm sorry I got drunk yesterday.”
    “Why did you? I still don't really understand why you took off like that.”
    “It was when you said we'd made love . It's that word.”
    “ Made ?”
    “No you idiot. Love . If you fuck someone, it doesn't mean anything—not really. It's good fun, but that's all it is. Making love—that's a different thing entirely.”
    “Haven't you made love before?”
    “I don't think so. It's only ever been a fuck .”
    “What scares you so much about love?”
     “I've seen what so-called love can do. My father supposedly loved my mum, but all he did was knock her around. Since he buggered off, she fucks whoever she wants. It doesn't seem to do her any harm.”
    “Is she happy?”
    “No idea. She's never sober long enough to ask.” Suzy saw the change in Todd's expression. “What?”
    “Nothing.”
    “You think I'm the same as my mum don't you.”
    “I never said—”
    “You didn't have to.” She tried to pull away, but he grabbed her arms, and pulled her close to him.
    “You aren't your mum. You're you. And that's who I love.”
    Suzy stared at him.
    “You can't say that! I told you not to say that word!”
    “Why? I said it because it's true. And no matter what you think, it's not a bad thing.”
    She could barely breathe. She wanted to break free and run away. Instead, she pressed her lips to his.
     
     
    **********
     
     
    “What did we just do?” Suzy said.
    They were lying next to each other in bed.
    “What do you mean?”
    “Was that a fuck or did we make love?”
    Todd kissed her. “Do you really have to ask?”
    “I'm just kidding,” she said. “We still get to fuck sometimes though don't we?”
    “You bet. Next time I'm feeling horny while we're in the kitchen, and I take you bent over the table. That'll be fucking.”
    “Okay. Just as long as I know. Now, I think you should make me a coffee.”
    “After the servicing I just gave you?”
    “Excuse me? Servicing? Those aren't the words of love-making. And anyway, I seem to remember I did my fair share of servicing.”
    “Toss for it?” Todd said.
    “Okay.”
    Todd pushed down the sheet, and took hold of his cock.
    “Not that kind of toss you pervert.” She thumped him on the arm.
    “Sorry. My bad.” He reached into the drawer and took out a ten-pence piece. “Heads or tails.”
    “Heads, and make sure you let it drop onto the bed. I don't trust you.”
    “Your mistrust cuts me.”
    “Really? Tough. Let it fall onto the bed.”
     
    “Heads! Yes!” Suzy grinned. “And bring me a Hobnob too would you, babes?”
     
     
    **********
     
     
    “I'm so glad you don't dunk your biscuits.” Todd said. “That would have been a deal breaker.”
    “God no.” Suzy screwed up her face. “It's disgusting. Lacey used to do