She had accepted Jesus as a child, and, like a loving Friend, He had never left her alone or without direction. And when she wanted to turn inward and selfishly dwell on her own hurts, time after time He reminded her . . . that others were hurting, too.
Closing her eyes, she thought for the first time about the others who might be lifting prayers for wisdom at that same hour. Valley View Elementary had employed over forty faculty members, and tonight many of them were walking the floor, as fearful as she about what tomorrow might bring. In Korea, Joe and Susan were caring for four children and probably praying that Danielle’s adoption would be finalized soon. And in the room next door, a good man slumbered uneasily, burdened with guilt for bringing bad news home to the wife he loved.
“Forgive me, Father.” Megan bowed her head as the enormity of her self-centeredness struck her. “I want what You want. I trust Your guiding hand. I praise You for Your goodness to me, even when that goodness takes the form of something I can’t understand.”
A praise song from church filled her heart, and she found herself paraphrasing the words in a broken whisper: “I will praise You, knowing that my praise will cost me every dream I have ever dreamed.”
Danielle and the future and my motherhood. I said I would not lose her, Lord, but I will let her go, if that’s what obedience requires.
“I will praise You with the joy that comes from knowing I have held nothing back.”
not these baby clothes, not this nursery, not my future
“I will praise You, for I know nothing can harm me.”
everything comes to me through Your sheltering hand, so I know I can trust You.
“I will praise You for giving me this opportunity to realize how much I need You.”
I need you for strength to face tomorrow and the day after that. I am at the end of myself, and I’ve nowhere to turn but to You, Lord.
“I will praise You for this opportunity to realize Your great provision and loving care.”
You can and will provide . . . if not today, then tomorrow
“I will praise You for the plan You always reveal in Your time. I will praise You for giving me a husband who loves me. And I will praise You for knowing my mother’s heart.”
and for designing it that way
The next words hurt Megan’s throat, but she forced them out into the quiet darkness of the nursery: “Though it costs me everything, I will offer up the sacrifice of praise.”
Chapter Ten
Megan woke the next morning to the light touch of sunlight upon her cheek. Momentarily confused by her surroundings, she pushed herself off the carpet. She’d fallen asleep in the nursery, in the midst of baby clothes and the ashes of her dreams . . . desires which now lay in the hands of her heavenly Father.
She staggered into the hall bathroom and stared at her reflection. The nap of the carpet had mottled her cheek; the hair at the top of her head stood upright in some sort of Mohawk imitation, and her eyes were still red-rimmed from weeping.
“Sleeping beauty, indeed,” she murmured, turning the faucet. She splashed her face with several bracing handfuls of cold water, then reached for a thick towel on the rack. The singing of pipes in the walls assured her Dave was awake and in the shower. He could probably use a strong cup of coffee.
She walked to the kitchen, plugged in the coffee maker, then cracked open the front door and shot a furtive glance up and down the street. When she was confident there were no neighbors about, she dashed out in her pajamas and picked up the newspaper, then took it to the kitchen.
Dave joined her a few moments later, his hair slicked back and shiny with wet. He wore a long-sleeved shirt, a dark blue tie, and matching navy pants. The conservative look, suitable for an educator eager to impress.
He lifted a brow when he saw her sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. “I saw that you were up already, but making coffee? What’s gotten
Closing her eyes, she thought for the first time about the others who might be lifting prayers for wisdom at that same hour. Valley View Elementary had employed over forty faculty members, and tonight many of them were walking the floor, as fearful as she about what tomorrow might bring. In Korea, Joe and Susan were caring for four children and probably praying that Danielle’s adoption would be finalized soon. And in the room next door, a good man slumbered uneasily, burdened with guilt for bringing bad news home to the wife he loved.
“Forgive me, Father.” Megan bowed her head as the enormity of her self-centeredness struck her. “I want what You want. I trust Your guiding hand. I praise You for Your goodness to me, even when that goodness takes the form of something I can’t understand.”
A praise song from church filled her heart, and she found herself paraphrasing the words in a broken whisper: “I will praise You, knowing that my praise will cost me every dream I have ever dreamed.”
Danielle and the future and my motherhood. I said I would not lose her, Lord, but I will let her go, if that’s what obedience requires.
“I will praise You with the joy that comes from knowing I have held nothing back.”
not these baby clothes, not this nursery, not my future
“I will praise You, for I know nothing can harm me.”
everything comes to me through Your sheltering hand, so I know I can trust You.
“I will praise You for giving me this opportunity to realize how much I need You.”
I need you for strength to face tomorrow and the day after that. I am at the end of myself, and I’ve nowhere to turn but to You, Lord.
“I will praise You for this opportunity to realize Your great provision and loving care.”
You can and will provide . . . if not today, then tomorrow
“I will praise You for the plan You always reveal in Your time. I will praise You for giving me a husband who loves me. And I will praise You for knowing my mother’s heart.”
and for designing it that way
The next words hurt Megan’s throat, but she forced them out into the quiet darkness of the nursery: “Though it costs me everything, I will offer up the sacrifice of praise.”
Chapter Ten
Megan woke the next morning to the light touch of sunlight upon her cheek. Momentarily confused by her surroundings, she pushed herself off the carpet. She’d fallen asleep in the nursery, in the midst of baby clothes and the ashes of her dreams . . . desires which now lay in the hands of her heavenly Father.
She staggered into the hall bathroom and stared at her reflection. The nap of the carpet had mottled her cheek; the hair at the top of her head stood upright in some sort of Mohawk imitation, and her eyes were still red-rimmed from weeping.
“Sleeping beauty, indeed,” she murmured, turning the faucet. She splashed her face with several bracing handfuls of cold water, then reached for a thick towel on the rack. The singing of pipes in the walls assured her Dave was awake and in the shower. He could probably use a strong cup of coffee.
She walked to the kitchen, plugged in the coffee maker, then cracked open the front door and shot a furtive glance up and down the street. When she was confident there were no neighbors about, she dashed out in her pajamas and picked up the newspaper, then took it to the kitchen.
Dave joined her a few moments later, his hair slicked back and shiny with wet. He wore a long-sleeved shirt, a dark blue tie, and matching navy pants. The conservative look, suitable for an educator eager to impress.
He lifted a brow when he saw her sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. “I saw that you were up already, but making coffee? What’s gotten
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