The Whole Megillah by Howard Engel Page B

the muscles of her neck betrayed the tension she was feeling. ‘I’m the one you want. I killed Tony! I killed him. Leave Colin alone. I’m the one you want.’
    Having said that, she began to cry quietly. Dalton crossed the room and gave her his pocket handkerchief--a big concession, considering how much he disliked the woman. With her face no longer visible, she continued to sob, with her shoulders heaving. Sergeant Pepper put his arm on her shoulder and said something like: ‘There, there. There, there.’
    I was still reeling from the sudden change of direction things had taken. I was quite willing to believe in the guilt of my client after he’d made his gaffe, but this was different. Honour Griffin, who had driven her first husband to an early grave--if Dalton was to be believed--killed Tony Moore and had the presence of mind not to fall into the trap Sergeant Pepper had set for her in keeping the cause of death a secret. I remembered when she mentioned the gun, remembered feeling relieved when she passed the test without my even having to lead her through it.
    After a few minutes, Honour wiped her eyes and blew her nose. She avoided looking at any of us. ‘Is there any of that coffee left?’ she asked, and one of the uniforms near the cookbooks moved down the stairs. When he came back, less than three minutes later, it was with a full silex and a stack of styrofoam cups. He’d forgotten the cream and sugar, but who can blame him. Pepper took the silex and poured a cup for Honour, who accepted it from him without a word. She attempted to look him in the face, by way of thanks, but she couldn’t get her head that high. As she sipped, Pepper poured out the rest of the round. We all watched him, as though we’d never seen coffee poured before.
    â€˜That feels better,’ Honour said in a voice that showed her courage was returning. It was an even, cello-like voice most of the time. Occasionally it failed her, just as the corners of her mouth gave her away. Her mouth twitched into a grimace as she spoke. Her hands turned the handkerchief in her grip like a twisted rag.
    â€˜I suppose I shouldn’t say anything,’ she said. ‘But I feel I have to.’
    Here Sergeant Pepper quietly and clearly warned her as he was required to by law. He asked her if she understood and she nodded assent. Lowther moved over to sit with her. He was already the defending attorney, but no one objected. He didn’t even caution her to be still. We could all see how important it was for her to be rid of what she had been keeping within her since last Thursday night.
    â€˜I didn’t intend to kill him, you know. I didn’t go there with that intention. We started arguing, that’s all. He told me about how he’d got rid of the megillah and how I would never be able to share in any of the thousands he’d got for it. I lost my head. I’m a greedy woman, I guess. He made me lose control. I told him about Colin and me. It was the only weapon I had. I knew it would hurt him and that’s what I wanted to do. Once he heard, he lost all sense of reason. He ran around calling me "slut" and "whore." He picked up a piece from the coffee table. It was a handle from an antique printing press. He was coming at me with it. I had to do something. He was lashing out at me with the handle. I felt my back hit the gun rack. I reached one of his rifles. But he was so close to me I wasn’t sure I could defend myself with it. Even in that state, I knew it wouldn’t be loaded, but I slung it at him. Right from the rack. The gun-butt was stuck at first, but it came free and hit Tony. Without looking, I knew it was a terrible blow. He dropped the handle, which was all I cared about, and then fell on top of it. He never moved.
    â€˜I just ran. I had to get away. I don’t think I even closed the front door. When I got home, Colin saw the state I was in. He got me calmed