ready?”
A smile rose from somewhere deep within me and parted my lips. And I couldn’t explain why, but suddenly I felt like the lightest person alive. “Tentacles? Ew. And I guess. I mean, yeah. Let’s do it.”
We climbed the railing. I held my breath. And together, we jumped.
Now that my life had a possible expiration date, why did it feel like I’d only just started living?
10
We freefell for a few moments, and just as my stomach got that gross falling feeling, we hit the water with dual thuddy-splashy sounds. Immediately we started rising and falling with the waves, out in the middle of the sea. It was weird, and fun, and I had never done anything like it before. There was this greenish glow on Cooper’s face from the stars, and he was just beautiful.
“Look down,” he whispered, and so I looked down and gasped again. “It’s phosphorescent plankton,” he said as I stared at my glow-in-the-dark skin. You know how little bubbles form on the inside of a champagne glass and then rise to the surface? That’s what was happening, except they were forming on my skin in a beautiful neon green color, and then they’d, like, zigzag away from me whenever I moved. My skin was sparkling, and for all the world it looked like I was emitting little green champagne bubbles. “My friends and I learned about this the first time we broke into the pier after dark and drunkenly jumped off,” Cooper explained. “We looked down and noticed that we’d lit up like fireworks. It was crazy, and we’ve been doing pier jumps every year since then.” He paused and licked his lip. “But anyway, now you can see what I see. You were wrong, Summer: you do glow.”
The subject of my scar left my brain, along with all the hatred I regularly pointed at myself, and suddenly it was just me and Cooper. Us. All at once the cruel words of supermarket strangers and gawking passersby faded away, and for the first time in my life, I truly believed I was beautiful.
Cooper reached up and touched my face.
“You said you wouldn’t touch me,” I whispered.
“I lied. Sue me.”
He ran his finger along my lip and then started going up my cheek, and I took a breath as he brushed over my scar. For the first time ever, I didn’t flinch.
And neither did he.
“You’re beautiful,” he said quietly as we treaded water like puppies under the night sky. “Really. You have this…I don’t know, this grace. You carry the light, my friend.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Come on,” he said. “Haven’t you noticed how people act around you?”
“Um, by staring?”
“No, not at all. It’s the craziest thing, but they, like, act better . They pull up their shoulders and speak softly and mess with their clothes. I noticed it both nights we’ve hung out, with waitresses and bartenders and just random people and stuff. It’s like you make them feel inferior just by being yourself.”
“Is this your ‘ thing ?’” I laughed after a minute. “Like, do you just go around doing crazy things like this for shy, vulnerable girls? Is this what you do ?”
“You’re not vulnerable, not really,” he said. “The way you look at people, the shine in your eyes…there’s a strength under there, whether you know it or not.”
I tried to push down the golden feeling I was drowning in. Come on, Summer, you’re acting like the annoying Facebook girls .
He laughed a little and then pulled away and started swimming ashore. I was dreading getting out of the water again, because that meant he’d be able to see my stomach in all its splendor, but I followed him anyway, trying not to think about all the sharks and stingrays and eels and feelings and all the other deadly, terrifying things that were circling us at that very second, maliciously plotting our bloody deaths.
“Doesn’t this scare you?” I asked Cooper as we swam.
“What?”
“Oh, I don’t know, this whole ‘ swimming in the pitch-black ocean in the middle of the night’
A smile rose from somewhere deep within me and parted my lips. And I couldn’t explain why, but suddenly I felt like the lightest person alive. “Tentacles? Ew. And I guess. I mean, yeah. Let’s do it.”
We climbed the railing. I held my breath. And together, we jumped.
Now that my life had a possible expiration date, why did it feel like I’d only just started living?
10
We freefell for a few moments, and just as my stomach got that gross falling feeling, we hit the water with dual thuddy-splashy sounds. Immediately we started rising and falling with the waves, out in the middle of the sea. It was weird, and fun, and I had never done anything like it before. There was this greenish glow on Cooper’s face from the stars, and he was just beautiful.
“Look down,” he whispered, and so I looked down and gasped again. “It’s phosphorescent plankton,” he said as I stared at my glow-in-the-dark skin. You know how little bubbles form on the inside of a champagne glass and then rise to the surface? That’s what was happening, except they were forming on my skin in a beautiful neon green color, and then they’d, like, zigzag away from me whenever I moved. My skin was sparkling, and for all the world it looked like I was emitting little green champagne bubbles. “My friends and I learned about this the first time we broke into the pier after dark and drunkenly jumped off,” Cooper explained. “We looked down and noticed that we’d lit up like fireworks. It was crazy, and we’ve been doing pier jumps every year since then.” He paused and licked his lip. “But anyway, now you can see what I see. You were wrong, Summer: you do glow.”
The subject of my scar left my brain, along with all the hatred I regularly pointed at myself, and suddenly it was just me and Cooper. Us. All at once the cruel words of supermarket strangers and gawking passersby faded away, and for the first time in my life, I truly believed I was beautiful.
Cooper reached up and touched my face.
“You said you wouldn’t touch me,” I whispered.
“I lied. Sue me.”
He ran his finger along my lip and then started going up my cheek, and I took a breath as he brushed over my scar. For the first time ever, I didn’t flinch.
And neither did he.
“You’re beautiful,” he said quietly as we treaded water like puppies under the night sky. “Really. You have this…I don’t know, this grace. You carry the light, my friend.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Come on,” he said. “Haven’t you noticed how people act around you?”
“Um, by staring?”
“No, not at all. It’s the craziest thing, but they, like, act better . They pull up their shoulders and speak softly and mess with their clothes. I noticed it both nights we’ve hung out, with waitresses and bartenders and just random people and stuff. It’s like you make them feel inferior just by being yourself.”
“Is this your ‘ thing ?’” I laughed after a minute. “Like, do you just go around doing crazy things like this for shy, vulnerable girls? Is this what you do ?”
“You’re not vulnerable, not really,” he said. “The way you look at people, the shine in your eyes…there’s a strength under there, whether you know it or not.”
I tried to push down the golden feeling I was drowning in. Come on, Summer, you’re acting like the annoying Facebook girls .
He laughed a little and then pulled away and started swimming ashore. I was dreading getting out of the water again, because that meant he’d be able to see my stomach in all its splendor, but I followed him anyway, trying not to think about all the sharks and stingrays and eels and feelings and all the other deadly, terrifying things that were circling us at that very second, maliciously plotting our bloody deaths.
“Doesn’t this scare you?” I asked Cooper as we swam.
“What?”
“Oh, I don’t know, this whole ‘ swimming in the pitch-black ocean in the middle of the night’
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