The Nothing Man by Jim Thompson Page B

thing."
    "B-But-but they'll get me all tangled up! I… I don't think I can take it!"
    "How about the gas chamber? Can you take that?"
    He buried his face in his arms and began to sob. I watched him for a minute and then I reached across the table, grabbed him by the hair, and jerked his head up.
    "Now, listen to me," I said. "You didn't kill her and you're not going to let anyone talk you into thinking you did. You're absolutely safe. A rough seventy-two hours is the worst they can give you. That's all, and then it's over. You can take it. I know you can. Know it, Tom; get me? If I didn't think so, I wouldn't say it!"
    He tried to work up a smile, not much of one, but it was a large improvement on blubbering. "Y-You're swell, Brownie. You really think I can-?"
    "Didn't I say so? Now, get yourself shaved and whatever else you have to do, and come on with me. I'll drop you off at the office."
    "Office? Oh, God, no, Brownie. Not to-"
    "Yes, to the office. They need you. It looks bad to lay off." I stood up and pulled him up. "Get moving. You can tell the colonel your phone's been out of order if he gives you any guff. He'll probably be so glad to have some help he won't say anything."
    It was like pulling teeth to get him started, and even after we were in the car and on our way downtown he kept on arguing and pleading, begging to be let off. He "just couldn't do it" and "everyone would know" and "I'm s-sick, Brownie" and so on, until I almost decided to take him home and let come what might. Not because I was irritated by him-although I was-but because I was afraid my efforts were being wasted. For if he had no more stamina than this, if he behaved this way now, he wouldn't hold out five minutes against Stukey. He'd cave in right away, and since that was the case.
    But perhaps he would stiffen up; perhaps, given a day or so, he would become his usual resentful self, a man dedicated to the proposition that what was demanded of him should automatically be withheld. Perhaps the very arrogance and in-turned sullenness that had got him into this mess would get him out of it. It seemed logical that it would. Fate would have to be very cruel indeed to reform his dully dogged spirit now.
    So I resisted his begging. I gave him drink for his stomach and steady pep talk for his nerves, and if the bottle was exhuasted-and it was-by the time we arrived at the Courier building, it had nothing at all on me.
    Sighing heavily, Tom opened the door and slowly eased one foot out to the curb. He hesitated, then suddenly turned around again.
    "Brownie. I-"
    "No," I said. "No, no, no, no! Think of the brave little woman. Think of the wee kiddie. And drag yourself to hell upstairs!"
    "I'm going, Brownie. But I may not see you again and you've been so swell-"
    I groaned. I removed my hat and slapped myself on the forehead.
    He frowned slightly, but he didn't budge. "It's about Dave. He's always been nice enough to me and you-well, you know how you've been. But things are different now. Maybe Dave's never done anything against me, but you've done plenty for me. We're on the same side, and anyone that's got it in for you-"
    "Got it in for me?" I said. "Not that there is anything serious in my sniping at the colonel-the colonel understands my playful nature-but aren't you just a little confused?"
    "I know." He nodded. "You're all the time riding him, and maybe you've been asking for it. But that doesn't cut any ice with me. You start noticing him, Brownie. Notice how he'll load you up-try to swamp you with work- when he's got other guys doing nothing. And he's always getting you out of the office, shooting you out on assignments. He doesn't want you around where you can shine up to the old man. He's jealous and-"
    I stopped him. Strangely, or perhaps not so strangely, I was angered by what he said.
    Dave was my own particular little target, and I wasn't going to have anyone else tossing darts at him. They had no reason to; there was such a thing as being