called her lawyer, she probably knew that. He dialed Lou’s cell phone. “Where are you?” he asked her.
“Grocery store. You have some special request?”
“And the kids?”
“Dee Dee’s at gymnastics, Ryan is at soccer, Eve is at cheer practice. Or maybe that’s over and she’s with Ashley—Ashley drove today and gave Eve a ride. Why?”
God, he thought. Did Cee Jay have any idea what these lessons, teams and activities cost? Just the sign-ups alone without factoring in uniforms, gear and associated costs were a strain. Twenty dollars for this gymnastics meet, twenty bucks for the bus for that soccer tournament out of town. Just to get your kid in the parks-and-rec soccer league was over fifty bucks. Then there were uniforms, shoes, your turn supplying sports drinks and bottled water and snacks, then there were regular pizza parties and barbeques to celebrate wins and season close. Piano, gymnastics, dance and cheerleading—those were expensive teams, lessons and uniforms. It never stopped. More than the money, which was always tight, the emotional and time investment could be exhausting. It took more than bread and water to raise a family. If he hadn’t had Lou the past ten years, he’d have been completely lost.
“I need a couple of things, Lou. I need you to gather up the kids and get them all home. And I need you to stay cool.”
“Why? Are we under nuclear attack?”
“Cee Jay’s in town. She wants to see them.”
“What!” Lou shrieked.
“I have to talk to the kids before they hear from some other source that their mother is around. And, Lou, Cee Jay rules apply. Do not lose your cool. Do not. I already lost mine a little....”
“Did you strangle her?” Lou asked with a shaky voice.
“No, but I wanted to.”
“You’re an underachiever. Oh, God,” she said. “Oh, dear God.”
Cee Jay rules actually had been Lou’s suggestion, but in the end it was harder for Lou than it was for Mac. They never said nasty things about Cee Jay in front of the kids—it simply wouldn’t serve any purpose to trash their mother. Wasn’t it hard enough on them to know she left them?
“Lou?”
“You’re right. You’re right. We’ll hold it together. Where is she?”
“Now? I met her for a cup of coffee at Denny’s just off the highway in Bandon and I asked her to leave. I told her she couldn’t see the kids and that I wanted her to go away and leave us alone. And she said I’d hear from her lawyer. We have to be ready, Lou.”
“She can’t do anything, can she, Mac?”
“I don’t know. One thing at a time. I’ll see you at home.”
He signed off and then just sat in the Sheriff’s Department vehicle. He could barely remember when he was eighteen, nineteen. He was a freshman at Oregon State, boinking his high school girlfriend wherever they could find a time and place to be alone. She was on the pill; they were supposed to be safe. Now he wondered, of course, if she hadn’t maneuvered that like everything else. For his part, he had such passion for her he could hardly think straight. So when the pregnancy came, they got married immediately, running off to Idaho to a justice of the peace and spending one night in a cheap roadside motel.
He had believed he loved her. He held back her hair while she was sick during her pregnancy; he rubbed her back, worked two jobs, did everything he could think of to make her happy. And after Eve was born, Cee Jay organized a big fancy white wedding and reception they couldn’t afford, just so all her friends could fuss over her and party with her.
Lou had been appalled. But she’d been there, holding Eve most of the time so Cee Jay could party.
After that, Mac couldn’t remember them ever being happy. Maybe he’d just been too goddamned tired.
Before leaving the Denny’s parking lot, Mac drove by the side of the restaurant to look at the booth where he had just been sitting. He could see Cee Jay sitting in the same booth, laughing
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