secret,” Banner said numbly. “They lost it the moment they turned her off.”
“I will take care of Bela,” Mona said. “What else can I do? I’m the back-up.”
“You can’t,” he said bitterly. “You have a life of your own.”
“I’ll do it. It’s the commitment I made when I agreed to this deal.”
“You’d have to marry me and devote yourself to him.”
“I will do it.”
“Oh God, Mona, no! You’re a fine and worthy woman and a great sexual partner, and I like you a lot, but apart from needlessly sacrificing your career and life, you aren’t she .”
“I’m not she,” she agreed. “But what else can we do? She would not have wanted Bela to languish.”
“I’ll take care of Bela. I can do that much. He’s my son.”
Mona did not make the obvious retort about being the genetic mother. “You will need time to adjust,” she said. “I will go home with you and help out, with Bela, with you, whatever is required. Once you are stable, I’ll return to my own life.”
He realized that this was a fine offer. He did need her help. “Thank you.”
“But what of the femdroid? She’s your legal wife.”
“I’ll take her home. I’ll take care of her too. She would have wanted that.”
“Banner, she can still do much of what she did before. She can shop, she can give you sex. All the things she did before she became aware.”
“And I loved her before she became aware,” he agreed. “I still do. But it’s not the same.”
“How well I understand!”
In all this dialogue, the femdroid did not react, because she had not been directly addressed. She had no awareness and no feelings. That was part of the awfulness of it. She was in every respect but one identical to the woman he loved, but that one had become critical.
Mona glanced at the technician. “Tell your people: no publicity about the change. We’ll handle it privately.”
“Got it,” the man agreed. Femdroids Inc hardly wanted the negative publicity.
They returned to Banner’s home. Mona took care of things, giving him time. They took turns holding Bela, who was satisfied to be with either, but not with the femdroid. It was a strange triangle.
Banner just wasn’t willing to let Elasa go so readily. He had evoked her consciousness before; maybe he could do it again. Then all would be well.
He tried. He held her and kissed her. She held him back and kissed him back. She remained good at that, of course. “I love you!” he whispered in her ear.
“I love you,” she agreed. She was perfect, but it was all programming.
He took her to the bed and had sex with her. “I love you,” he said as he entered her. She went into the orgasm; the macro remained. But it was automatic, not conscious. Then, when he was done but not yet out of her, he repeated it: “I love you!”
She hesitated, and for a moment he thought he had succeeded. But then she went into another orgasm. The program governed; she lacked awareness of his conflicting emotions.
The next night he tried it with Mona. Mona wanted Elasa to recover as much as he did, and was willing to try almost anything. They had sex in the same bed with Elasa. But it evoked no jealousy, and she did not offer to make it a threesome. She lacked the judgment and initiative of consciousness.
They brought Bela to her, and she tried to have him nurse, but he rejected her violently. She shed no tears, feeling no emotion. She was a femdroid, nothing more.
As he saw that he couldn’t bring her back, Banner got depressed. It felt like a marriage when love had departed, and that was close enough: the femdroid could say the words and act the part, but couldn’t really love him. There had been a time when he was willing to settle for that illusion, but no more. His love had been completed when she became aware, and now he could not love the machine.
“Oh, Elasa,” he said, grieving.
“Yes, Banner,” she said. “Now?”
He would have laughed if he could. “Not now, thank
“I will take care of Bela,” Mona said. “What else can I do? I’m the back-up.”
“You can’t,” he said bitterly. “You have a life of your own.”
“I’ll do it. It’s the commitment I made when I agreed to this deal.”
“You’d have to marry me and devote yourself to him.”
“I will do it.”
“Oh God, Mona, no! You’re a fine and worthy woman and a great sexual partner, and I like you a lot, but apart from needlessly sacrificing your career and life, you aren’t she .”
“I’m not she,” she agreed. “But what else can we do? She would not have wanted Bela to languish.”
“I’ll take care of Bela. I can do that much. He’s my son.”
Mona did not make the obvious retort about being the genetic mother. “You will need time to adjust,” she said. “I will go home with you and help out, with Bela, with you, whatever is required. Once you are stable, I’ll return to my own life.”
He realized that this was a fine offer. He did need her help. “Thank you.”
“But what of the femdroid? She’s your legal wife.”
“I’ll take her home. I’ll take care of her too. She would have wanted that.”
“Banner, she can still do much of what she did before. She can shop, she can give you sex. All the things she did before she became aware.”
“And I loved her before she became aware,” he agreed. “I still do. But it’s not the same.”
“How well I understand!”
In all this dialogue, the femdroid did not react, because she had not been directly addressed. She had no awareness and no feelings. That was part of the awfulness of it. She was in every respect but one identical to the woman he loved, but that one had become critical.
Mona glanced at the technician. “Tell your people: no publicity about the change. We’ll handle it privately.”
“Got it,” the man agreed. Femdroids Inc hardly wanted the negative publicity.
They returned to Banner’s home. Mona took care of things, giving him time. They took turns holding Bela, who was satisfied to be with either, but not with the femdroid. It was a strange triangle.
Banner just wasn’t willing to let Elasa go so readily. He had evoked her consciousness before; maybe he could do it again. Then all would be well.
He tried. He held her and kissed her. She held him back and kissed him back. She remained good at that, of course. “I love you!” he whispered in her ear.
“I love you,” she agreed. She was perfect, but it was all programming.
He took her to the bed and had sex with her. “I love you,” he said as he entered her. She went into the orgasm; the macro remained. But it was automatic, not conscious. Then, when he was done but not yet out of her, he repeated it: “I love you!”
She hesitated, and for a moment he thought he had succeeded. But then she went into another orgasm. The program governed; she lacked awareness of his conflicting emotions.
The next night he tried it with Mona. Mona wanted Elasa to recover as much as he did, and was willing to try almost anything. They had sex in the same bed with Elasa. But it evoked no jealousy, and she did not offer to make it a threesome. She lacked the judgment and initiative of consciousness.
They brought Bela to her, and she tried to have him nurse, but he rejected her violently. She shed no tears, feeling no emotion. She was a femdroid, nothing more.
As he saw that he couldn’t bring her back, Banner got depressed. It felt like a marriage when love had departed, and that was close enough: the femdroid could say the words and act the part, but couldn’t really love him. There had been a time when he was willing to settle for that illusion, but no more. His love had been completed when she became aware, and now he could not love the machine.
“Oh, Elasa,” he said, grieving.
“Yes, Banner,” she said. “Now?”
He would have laughed if he could. “Not now, thank
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