clearly not running anywhere. At best, you’re limping,” said Boltac
“I mean, I go to face this dread foe who has so wounded our fair city. I mean not to flee, but to revenge this wrong.”
“That’s a lotta big fancy words. You want to be the big Hero? Save the girl, win the Kingdom, all that?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that’s where I’m going.”
“You?” asked Relan, in danger of developing a healthy skepticism in light of recent events.
“I do have to warn you, you’re probably not going to make it through this thing alive.”
“Me? But I’m young and strong. You’re old and fat. You’re the one who’s going to be killed first.”
“En-henh. I’ll give you odds on that. Out of the two of us, who looks more dangerous? Seriously, you got a crossbow, which one of us you gonna shoot first?”
Relan let the question sink in.
“You are young and strong and scary looking. They’ll definitely shoot you first. Me, I’m non-threatening.”
Relan still didn’t climb onto the carriage. “What changed your mind? Isn’t this what you pay taxes for?”
The smile dropped from Boltac’s face. “The Duke ran away. Took his guards with him.”
Relan’s mouth dropped open. “Can he do that?”
“Age and treachery kid. That’s his play, and it’s a good one. For him at least. So it’s just us. Ain’t nobody else. Which is good, because what we are going to do is
very
dangerous and
very
stupid.”
“It’s not stupid. You’re going to rescue the lady, the Love of your Life!” said Relan.
“Something like that. I mean, I eeeeeeeh… like having her around, and I’m going to get her back, but ‘rescue’ is maybe too strong a word to, uh…”
“Stout Merchant, from down here it looks like you are blushing.”
“Oh, uh, it’s just the heat. The sunshine, you see. I’m not used to it on account of I’m in my shop all the time,” said Boltac, mopping at his face with his sleeve.
As Boltac covered his emotion, Relan climbed aboard the coach and sat beside Boltac. “True Love. It is a noble cause. I will lend you my sword, stout Merchant.”
“You mean you’re gonna lend me MY sword!”
“It’s just a figure of speech,” Relan muttered. Boltac hitched the reins, and the heavy draft horses lurched the carriage into motion.
“Ahh, I know kid,” said Boltac. “You got a good heart, but you’re kind of an idiot. No offense. I mean, think about this. What is in this for you?”
“Well, I’ll get to make a name for myself. Be somebody. Maybe get a girl of my own.”
“You know we’re going to get killed, right?
You
are definitely going to get killed. And it’s not even your girl.”
Relan smiled. “Not if you brought any more of those healing potions. I mean that was amazing. I’ve never seen anything like that. I didn’t even know–”
“Kid, I didn’t bring any more potions. Not like that.”
“Well, why not?”
“Because that was the only one I had. Magic,
real
Magic, is very expensive. And it’s tricky. If a plan depends on Magic, it’s probably not gonna work.”
“But it was the most amazing, stupendous, unbelievable thing I have ever…”
“This is what I’m saying. It was
Magic
. But the downside is I’m probably growing an extra liver. Or a lung in the middle of my stomach.”
“It worked out. You’re alive.”
“Yeah, so far it worked out, but next time, ennnh?” Boltac tipped his palm from side to side. “With Magic, there’s always a catch. That’s how they get you.”
“So what did you bring?” Relan asked, looking at the bags on top of the coach.
“A little of this, a little of that, and a shitload of coin.”
“Why money?”
“Why money? WHY MONEY?! Are you serious?”
“There’s not going to be anything to buy.”
“Are you kidding? There’s gonna be all kinds of things to buy. Not least of which, the woman I want to get back.”
“Wait, I thought this was a Daring Rescue!”
“No, it’s just a rescue. If
“I mean, I go to face this dread foe who has so wounded our fair city. I mean not to flee, but to revenge this wrong.”
“That’s a lotta big fancy words. You want to be the big Hero? Save the girl, win the Kingdom, all that?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that’s where I’m going.”
“You?” asked Relan, in danger of developing a healthy skepticism in light of recent events.
“I do have to warn you, you’re probably not going to make it through this thing alive.”
“Me? But I’m young and strong. You’re old and fat. You’re the one who’s going to be killed first.”
“En-henh. I’ll give you odds on that. Out of the two of us, who looks more dangerous? Seriously, you got a crossbow, which one of us you gonna shoot first?”
Relan let the question sink in.
“You are young and strong and scary looking. They’ll definitely shoot you first. Me, I’m non-threatening.”
Relan still didn’t climb onto the carriage. “What changed your mind? Isn’t this what you pay taxes for?”
The smile dropped from Boltac’s face. “The Duke ran away. Took his guards with him.”
Relan’s mouth dropped open. “Can he do that?”
“Age and treachery kid. That’s his play, and it’s a good one. For him at least. So it’s just us. Ain’t nobody else. Which is good, because what we are going to do is
very
dangerous and
very
stupid.”
“It’s not stupid. You’re going to rescue the lady, the Love of your Life!” said Relan.
“Something like that. I mean, I eeeeeeeh… like having her around, and I’m going to get her back, but ‘rescue’ is maybe too strong a word to, uh…”
“Stout Merchant, from down here it looks like you are blushing.”
“Oh, uh, it’s just the heat. The sunshine, you see. I’m not used to it on account of I’m in my shop all the time,” said Boltac, mopping at his face with his sleeve.
As Boltac covered his emotion, Relan climbed aboard the coach and sat beside Boltac. “True Love. It is a noble cause. I will lend you my sword, stout Merchant.”
“You mean you’re gonna lend me MY sword!”
“It’s just a figure of speech,” Relan muttered. Boltac hitched the reins, and the heavy draft horses lurched the carriage into motion.
“Ahh, I know kid,” said Boltac. “You got a good heart, but you’re kind of an idiot. No offense. I mean, think about this. What is in this for you?”
“Well, I’ll get to make a name for myself. Be somebody. Maybe get a girl of my own.”
“You know we’re going to get killed, right?
You
are definitely going to get killed. And it’s not even your girl.”
Relan smiled. “Not if you brought any more of those healing potions. I mean that was amazing. I’ve never seen anything like that. I didn’t even know–”
“Kid, I didn’t bring any more potions. Not like that.”
“Well, why not?”
“Because that was the only one I had. Magic,
real
Magic, is very expensive. And it’s tricky. If a plan depends on Magic, it’s probably not gonna work.”
“But it was the most amazing, stupendous, unbelievable thing I have ever…”
“This is what I’m saying. It was
Magic
. But the downside is I’m probably growing an extra liver. Or a lung in the middle of my stomach.”
“It worked out. You’re alive.”
“Yeah, so far it worked out, but next time, ennnh?” Boltac tipped his palm from side to side. “With Magic, there’s always a catch. That’s how they get you.”
“So what did you bring?” Relan asked, looking at the bags on top of the coach.
“A little of this, a little of that, and a shitload of coin.”
“Why money?”
“Why money? WHY MONEY?! Are you serious?”
“There’s not going to be anything to buy.”
“Are you kidding? There’s gonna be all kinds of things to buy. Not least of which, the woman I want to get back.”
“Wait, I thought this was a Daring Rescue!”
“No, it’s just a rescue. If
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