request. “What did
you just call yourself?”
She sighed. “Honey, I hate repeating myself.
I’m only gonna give you the rundown one time and then I’ll field
questions. So keep quiet and listen and try not to say “what?” too
many times. It makes you look stupid and I know you’re not an
idiot. You’re a bright guy when you want to be.”
“Thanks,” he said sarcastically. “It’s always
nice to get a good report from my fairy-godmother. Seriously, I
think it’s time for you to go.”
“And leave all your questions unanswered and
your life in a shambles?”
“Assuming I have questions, I don’t think any
of them can be answered by a crazy lady who thinks she’s my
fairy-godmother. And my life isn’t in any “shambles”. He was
starting to look impatient.
She shook her head. “No cases are as hopeless
as the ones who don’t even know they’re lost. Listen, whether you
recognize it or not, your life has run far off the track, and if I
don’t take a hand soon it’s going to be a colossal train wreck.
That’s why I’ve come to you now. We godmothers don’t get to step in
and appear to our protégés any time we like. This is a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. That’s why you and I have to make
this visit count.”
“Visit?” he looked perplexed.
“That’s right. You’re mine for the next
twenty-four hours and I’ve got just that amount of time to
straighten your affairs out. And that’s going to take some work.
Luckily, I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve because, brother, I’m
going to need them all.”
He snorted. Running a long-fingered hand
through his dark curls, he looked torn between annoyed disbelief
and grudging interest.
“I suppose you’ve got a magic wand up your
sleeve, too,” he said.
She sensed now was the moment to bring out
the big guns. “Never carry wands up my sleeve; I’ve lost too many
that way. No, the proper place for a wand is stowed away somewhere
safe.”
She dragged her tiny, beaded handbag off her
elbow and reached inside.
He raised his eyebrows and she was surprised
to note the hint of a smile lurking around the edge of his lips.
“Of course. You carry your magic wand around in your purse.”
“You needn’t sound so skeptical.” She dug
around in the shallow pocket a moment before finding what she
wanted and slipping it out into the open.
Danny was unimpressed. “That’s your wand? A
tube of lipstick?”
She smiled. “Ah, Danny, always such a
doubter. Educating you is going to be more fun than I’d
expected.”
Swirling the tube of lipstick in the air
three times, she silently mouthed the spell she knew by heart and,
quick as magic, the short tube transformed into a twelve-inch rod,
light as paper and clear as glass.
Danny started at the transformation. “What—?
How—?”
She waved him to silence. “Questions later.
First, let’s get this roach den cleared out. The smell in here’s
about to make me sick.”
Remaining frozen in place, he seemed unable
to tear his gaze away from the glass wand in her hand. Softly, as
if to himself, he muttered, “I can’t believe it. Somebody tell me
I’m just having a crazy dream.”
She looked around distastefully. “I don’t
know what kind of dreams you have but if this were one of my
dreams, there wouldn’t be moldy pizza on the coffee table. But
never mind, it’s easily taken care of.”
Again muttering a low string of secret words
under her breath, she flicked the wand in the general direction of
the dirty coffee table. Instantly, paper trash, old half-eaten
food, and every other kind of clutter covering the tabletop lifted
into the air.
Mind on her task, she tuned out everything
else and was scarcely aware of Danny’s bugged-out eyes as he
watched her perform her magic. One mess after another, she waved
her wand at them and bid them all carry themselves to their proper
places. Paper plates and carryout boxes floated through the air to
drop into the full trashcan. Filthy
you just call yourself?”
She sighed. “Honey, I hate repeating myself.
I’m only gonna give you the rundown one time and then I’ll field
questions. So keep quiet and listen and try not to say “what?” too
many times. It makes you look stupid and I know you’re not an
idiot. You’re a bright guy when you want to be.”
“Thanks,” he said sarcastically. “It’s always
nice to get a good report from my fairy-godmother. Seriously, I
think it’s time for you to go.”
“And leave all your questions unanswered and
your life in a shambles?”
“Assuming I have questions, I don’t think any
of them can be answered by a crazy lady who thinks she’s my
fairy-godmother. And my life isn’t in any “shambles”. He was
starting to look impatient.
She shook her head. “No cases are as hopeless
as the ones who don’t even know they’re lost. Listen, whether you
recognize it or not, your life has run far off the track, and if I
don’t take a hand soon it’s going to be a colossal train wreck.
That’s why I’ve come to you now. We godmothers don’t get to step in
and appear to our protégés any time we like. This is a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. That’s why you and I have to make
this visit count.”
“Visit?” he looked perplexed.
“That’s right. You’re mine for the next
twenty-four hours and I’ve got just that amount of time to
straighten your affairs out. And that’s going to take some work.
Luckily, I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve because, brother, I’m
going to need them all.”
He snorted. Running a long-fingered hand
through his dark curls, he looked torn between annoyed disbelief
and grudging interest.
“I suppose you’ve got a magic wand up your
sleeve, too,” he said.
She sensed now was the moment to bring out
the big guns. “Never carry wands up my sleeve; I’ve lost too many
that way. No, the proper place for a wand is stowed away somewhere
safe.”
She dragged her tiny, beaded handbag off her
elbow and reached inside.
He raised his eyebrows and she was surprised
to note the hint of a smile lurking around the edge of his lips.
“Of course. You carry your magic wand around in your purse.”
“You needn’t sound so skeptical.” She dug
around in the shallow pocket a moment before finding what she
wanted and slipping it out into the open.
Danny was unimpressed. “That’s your wand? A
tube of lipstick?”
She smiled. “Ah, Danny, always such a
doubter. Educating you is going to be more fun than I’d
expected.”
Swirling the tube of lipstick in the air
three times, she silently mouthed the spell she knew by heart and,
quick as magic, the short tube transformed into a twelve-inch rod,
light as paper and clear as glass.
Danny started at the transformation. “What—?
How—?”
She waved him to silence. “Questions later.
First, let’s get this roach den cleared out. The smell in here’s
about to make me sick.”
Remaining frozen in place, he seemed unable
to tear his gaze away from the glass wand in her hand. Softly, as
if to himself, he muttered, “I can’t believe it. Somebody tell me
I’m just having a crazy dream.”
She looked around distastefully. “I don’t
know what kind of dreams you have but if this were one of my
dreams, there wouldn’t be moldy pizza on the coffee table. But
never mind, it’s easily taken care of.”
Again muttering a low string of secret words
under her breath, she flicked the wand in the general direction of
the dirty coffee table. Instantly, paper trash, old half-eaten
food, and every other kind of clutter covering the tabletop lifted
into the air.
Mind on her task, she tuned out everything
else and was scarcely aware of Danny’s bugged-out eyes as he
watched her perform her magic. One mess after another, she waved
her wand at them and bid them all carry themselves to their proper
places. Paper plates and carryout boxes floated through the air to
drop into the full trashcan. Filthy
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