that. And then there was drugs. Thatâs when she started going with Brendan. He was a disc jockey. Good-looking feller, but he had no thought for anybody but himself. By the time the baby came and she dropped out of college she was pretty near bottom. Sheâd not been in touch with home for months. I didnât even know she was pregnant. She just turned up one day, grey as a ghost, with this three-week-old scrap in her arms, and the two of them suffering withdrawal symptoms.â
âWithdrawal symptoms?â Sam raised his eyebrows.
âJulie was addicted to heroin.â
âReally? Iâd never have guessed.â
âSheâs clean now, thank God. It took her a while. And Harry played his part, Iâll give him that. When he heard the state she was in with a newborn baby, he was back here on the first plane. Blamed himself for never being there when she needed him.â
âSo he stayed for a while?â
âOh no. Said his business didnât allow it. But he phoned a lot. And he fixed a clinic for her â to get her off the drugs. Eventually he persuaded her back to college to complete her degree.â
âWhile you looked after Liam.â
âWhile I looked after Liam,â she confirmed. âHad to give up my own job to do it.â She looked embarrassed suddenly. âOch, you poor man. You came here to read some crazy letter and you get a life history rammed down your throat.â
He was about to tell her it didnât matter when he heard tyres on the gravel at the front.
âThatâll be them now. They went in my Clio,â she explained. âJulie doesnât have a car of her own.â
A few moments later Sam heard a key in the lock. He stood up. The boy stumbled in, rubbing his eyes.
âFell asleep,â Julie mouthed to her mother as she gathered her grandson into her arms.
âWhatâll it be, Liam?â the older woman asked. âFish fingers, I suppose.â
The sleepy boy dumped his head on her shoulder, then stuck a thumb in his mouth.
Julie turned to Sam. She still had her glasses on from the driving, but took them off and held them in her hand. There were tight lines of tension round her eyes. âIâm sorry if youâve been waiting,â she told him.
âThatâs all right.â She looked sun-baked and wholesome and he could forgive her anything.
âIâll get you the letter.â
Sam stared longingly at her lean limbs as she climbed the open staircase to the floor above. She wore blue shorts and a white sleeveless vest that clung to her breasts. Her shoulders were red from the sun. She reappeared a few seconds later with an envelope.
âIf you want to read it in peace, thereâs a bench in the garden,â she told him, sliding the patio door fully open. She was eyeing him with reserve, as if trying to form a judgement of him.
âYou said it arrived this morning?â Sam asked as they crossed the lawn to where it sloped to the water.
âThatâs right. It shook me when I picked it off the mat and saw the writing.â
âWhy would it have come here instead of to Acton?â
âHe chopped and changed. Anything he wanted to be sure I got he sent to Woodbridge, for some reason. He knew I was here at the weekends.â
The seat was under a willow tree. She sat close beside him, as if not trusting him to be alone with theletter. Solemnly she handed the envelope to him and he extracted the contents.
Harry Jackmanâs handwriting had a slight backward slope. âThereâs no date,â Sam commented, inhaling the orange-blossom smell of her sun cream with the intensity of a solvent sniffer. She sat close enough for him to feel the warmth of her body.
âNo. Thereâs nothing to say when it was written.â She hugged her arms to her chest and clamped a hand over her mouth, staring downriver to where the racing dinghies were being hauled from the
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