They didn’t have a doubt.
When I got my voice back, I said, “It’s not that easy. There’s more to it than that.”
“Like what?” said Rick.
“The police aren’t the only ones who are after me. In fact, they’re not even the worst of it.” I looked from one of them to another, from one waiting gaze to another. “There’s some kind of underground group. They call themselves the Homelanders. They tried to assassinate the secretary of Homeland Security.”
“Oh yeah,” said Rick. “Last month, on the bridge. I heard about that. They said you might have been guilty of that too.”
“I wasn’t guilty . . .”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, we know that. But what’s it all about?”
“I’m not sure exactly. I know they’re terrorists. Foreign. Islamist. Only they recruit homegrown anti-Americans. They think I was one of them . . . What?”
Rick had laughed. “Sorry,” he said. “The idea of you joining a group of anti-Americans. Weren’t you, like, born on the Fourth of July or something?”
I had to press my lips together to keep my emotions down. Again, even I had doubts about what had happened to me. Even I wondered: Was I a good guy or a bad guy? But my friends didn’t. They didn’t wonder at all.
“Well . . . anyway . . .” I finally managed to say. “They think I was one of them and that I betrayed them. They want me dead. And they’re dangerous, man. I mean, like, really dangerous. If they figure out that you know where I am, they’ll come after you for sure.”
“He’s right,” said Rick to Miler. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Would you stop?” I said—although I couldn’t help laughing myself this time. “This is serious. They’re serious. One of them tried to knife me in the library.”
“In the library?” said Josh. “Gee, I hope he was quiet about it.”
Frustrated, I closed my eyes, lowered my head, pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger. These guys didn’t get it. They thought it was all some sort of big joke, some sort of big adventure.
Rick put his hand on my shoulder. “Hey,” he said, as if he was reading my mind. “We do get it. We understand. It’s real. It’s dangerous. And believe me, Charlie, we’d all rather be somewhere else. But what are we gonna do: Leave you out here alone to fend for yourself? Let you get arrested the first time you stick your ugly face out the door? The way I look at it—the way we all look at it—we don’t really have any choice. You’re our friend, you’re in trouble, and you’re innocent. So here we are.”
I had to turn away again. I looked out the window, down at the cemetery. It was all blurry for a couple of seconds, but when my eyes cleared, I saw the mourning woman again with her blank stare from under her cowl and her grief-stricken gesture at the empty air. So much was gone, I thought to myself. My family, my school days, my safety, my childhood, a year of my life. I’d lost so much.
But not everything. My friends were here. My friends were still here.
“Okay,” I said. I turned back to them quickly, speaking brusquely to hide my emotions. “Okay, if that’s the way you want it . . . But if we’re gonna do this, we gotta do it right.”
“Okay,” said Rick. The others nodded. “Like how?”
“Well,” I said. “Like, how did you all get here?”
“We parked over in the Lake Center Mall,” said Miler. “Then we cut through the housing development to those woods back there. No one could’ve followed us without our seeing them.”
“Good,” I said. I took a few pacing steps into the room. “That’s really good. You gotta do stuff like that every time you come. Change things up. Make sure no one’s watching.”
“Okay,” said Rick. “What else?”
“Well, you can’t tell anyone. Not anyone.” I looked at them, searched their faces. “The more people who know, the more danger there is. No matter who it is, no matter how much you may think you can trust
When I got my voice back, I said, “It’s not that easy. There’s more to it than that.”
“Like what?” said Rick.
“The police aren’t the only ones who are after me. In fact, they’re not even the worst of it.” I looked from one of them to another, from one waiting gaze to another. “There’s some kind of underground group. They call themselves the Homelanders. They tried to assassinate the secretary of Homeland Security.”
“Oh yeah,” said Rick. “Last month, on the bridge. I heard about that. They said you might have been guilty of that too.”
“I wasn’t guilty . . .”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, we know that. But what’s it all about?”
“I’m not sure exactly. I know they’re terrorists. Foreign. Islamist. Only they recruit homegrown anti-Americans. They think I was one of them . . . What?”
Rick had laughed. “Sorry,” he said. “The idea of you joining a group of anti-Americans. Weren’t you, like, born on the Fourth of July or something?”
I had to press my lips together to keep my emotions down. Again, even I had doubts about what had happened to me. Even I wondered: Was I a good guy or a bad guy? But my friends didn’t. They didn’t wonder at all.
“Well . . . anyway . . .” I finally managed to say. “They think I was one of them and that I betrayed them. They want me dead. And they’re dangerous, man. I mean, like, really dangerous. If they figure out that you know where I am, they’ll come after you for sure.”
“He’s right,” said Rick to Miler. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Would you stop?” I said—although I couldn’t help laughing myself this time. “This is serious. They’re serious. One of them tried to knife me in the library.”
“In the library?” said Josh. “Gee, I hope he was quiet about it.”
Frustrated, I closed my eyes, lowered my head, pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger. These guys didn’t get it. They thought it was all some sort of big joke, some sort of big adventure.
Rick put his hand on my shoulder. “Hey,” he said, as if he was reading my mind. “We do get it. We understand. It’s real. It’s dangerous. And believe me, Charlie, we’d all rather be somewhere else. But what are we gonna do: Leave you out here alone to fend for yourself? Let you get arrested the first time you stick your ugly face out the door? The way I look at it—the way we all look at it—we don’t really have any choice. You’re our friend, you’re in trouble, and you’re innocent. So here we are.”
I had to turn away again. I looked out the window, down at the cemetery. It was all blurry for a couple of seconds, but when my eyes cleared, I saw the mourning woman again with her blank stare from under her cowl and her grief-stricken gesture at the empty air. So much was gone, I thought to myself. My family, my school days, my safety, my childhood, a year of my life. I’d lost so much.
But not everything. My friends were here. My friends were still here.
“Okay,” I said. I turned back to them quickly, speaking brusquely to hide my emotions. “Okay, if that’s the way you want it . . . But if we’re gonna do this, we gotta do it right.”
“Okay,” said Rick. The others nodded. “Like how?”
“Well,” I said. “Like, how did you all get here?”
“We parked over in the Lake Center Mall,” said Miler. “Then we cut through the housing development to those woods back there. No one could’ve followed us without our seeing them.”
“Good,” I said. I took a few pacing steps into the room. “That’s really good. You gotta do stuff like that every time you come. Change things up. Make sure no one’s watching.”
“Okay,” said Rick. “What else?”
“Well, you can’t tell anyone. Not anyone.” I looked at them, searched their faces. “The more people who know, the more danger there is. No matter who it is, no matter how much you may think you can trust
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