The Judas Scar by Amanda Jennings Page A

‘Death is hard however it comes. We were expecting my mother’s for a very long time. She was in so much pain and had been for such a long time that in a way it seemed kinder for her to pass away. I still miss her, every day, even after all these years.’
    Just then, Will came into the living room carrying three plates like a silver-service waiter. ‘Supper,’ he announced with exaggerated brightness. ‘Burnt, bloody and somewhere in between.’
    Harmony pushed her mother’s death from her mind and stood.
    ‘That looks delicious, Will,’ she said, as she approached the table. She took a plate from him.
    ‘This is very kind of you,’ Luke said, as he came to the table and placed his wine down. ‘And what a treat – steak is one of my favourites.’
    Will wiped his hands on the tea towel, still slung over his shoulder, then pulled his chair out to sit down. ‘I hope it tastes okay.’ Harmony looked at her husband and saw how hard he was working to appear relaxed, how rehearsed his words were, as if he’d been in the kitchen practicing until he could talk without tripping up.
    ‘So how did you two meet?’ Harmony said as she cut into her steak. It was just how she liked it, cooked through with the slightest blush of pink in the middle.
    ‘You know how.’ Will furrowed his brow. ‘At school.’
    ‘Yes, but I wondered how you actually became friends.You seem quite different. It would be interesting to know what drew you to each other, I suppose.’
    ‘We just met,’ Will said. ‘We shared a dormitory with thirty other boys. No special story.’
    ‘But the thing that pulled us together … you know, cemented our friendship, was pretty special, wasn’t it, Will? Let’s be honest now.’ Luke finished his mouthful then sat back in his chair. He smiled broadly and reached for his wine.
    Harmony saw her husband swallow. ‘It was a long time ago. I’m not sure we need to talk about it. It wasn’t the happiest of times for either of us.’
    Luke laughed. ‘It certainly wasn’t. But what do they say? What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?’
    Harmony felt Will tense. She watched him as he cut vigorously at his meat. ‘The steak’s a bit tough,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry about that. I should have let it rest a while longer.’
    ‘Mine’s perfect,’ said Luke.
    Will raised his head. His face was stony, his eyes hooded, and Harmony was shocked to see how angry he looked. He put his knife and fork together then pushed his plate away. ‘I can’t do this anymore,’ he said.
    ‘Will?’
    ‘It’s a charade, Harmony.’ Then he turned on Luke. ‘Don’t you remember what it was like? How can you just sit there like the steak is your only care in the world, like you’re interested in my photographs or how I met my wife, laughing it all off like it didn’t matter?’
    Harmony looked between the two men, Will’s face reddening, his breathing heavy, hands clutching the table with white knuckles. And then Luke, impassive, his body relaxed, registering no surprise.
    ‘You want me to tell you the story he’s laughing about?’ Will said to her suddenly.
    ‘No, I don’t—’
    ‘You want me to go over it in all its unpleasant glory?’ But then Will stopped speaking. He shook his head, pinched his nose between two fingers, and closed his eyes.
    Luke leant forward and rested a hand lightly on hers. ‘We knew each other, of course, from the dormitory, from lessons, but hadn’t really spoken much. Then one day, Will found me tied to a homemade cross,’ he said. ‘Two scaffolding planks stolen from a building site.’ He placed his knife and fork on his plate so they were perfectly straight beside each other. ‘A group of boys made it using rope and bungees, then grabbed me after supper. They tied me to it and left me on the lawn outside the headmaster’s house.’ He spoke with no emotion, his face blank, intonation flat; he could just as easily have been discussing the weather