says Shona, draining her plastic glass. 'I gave him an ultimatum. Her or me. He says I'm the most important thing in his life.'
Hence his presence here, guesses Ruth. A conciliatory gesture, appearing with Shona in front of this significantly insignificant group of people. She is sure that Phil would never accompany Shona to a departmental social or the Dean's lecture. Equally, she is sure he will never leave his wife. Just as Nelson will never leave his.
'Be careful,' is all she says.
'What do you mean?' Shona tosses her hair, which glows as brightly as one of the torches in the darkness.
'I've known Phil a long time. He says what he thinks you want to hear.'
Shona glares at her. Ruth is not sure what she would have said if Max hadn't come over, placing a hand on Ruth's arm. 'Do you want to make a move?' he says. 'It's getting a bit cold out here.'
Ruth agrees gratefully. With the disappearance of the sun, the night has got distinctly chilly. The wind is stronger too. Ruth pulls her jacket tightly around her but the Druids in their thin robes seem impervious to the cold. Their children too. As she and Max walk along the beach she can see them still playing in the near darkness. They have dug a deep hole and are chanting, 'Ding Dong Dell, Pussy's in the well.'
'Some things never change,' she says to Max as they make their way back to the path through the dunes. It is too dangerous to cross the Saltmarsh after dark; they must take the birdwatchers' trail, a raised shingle path that leads back to the car park. Max has left his car there. Ruth hopes he will give her a lift home and won't expect to come in for coffee.
'Interesting rhyme,' says Max in his tutorial voice. 'It's thought that Pussy refers to a prostitute.'
'What are they doing, drowning her?'
'Probably a version of a ducking stool.'
'How does it go? "Who put her in? Little Johnny Green".'
'"Who pulled her out? Little Jimmy Stout". Something like that.'
'Who was Jimmy then? Her pimp?'
Max laughs. 'I like you, Ruth,' he says.
There's no answer to that. 'I like you too' would sound impossibly arch. Changing the subject would sound like a snub. And she does like him. How much, she doesn't really want to consider. It's all so complicated, that's the problem. She is pregnant with someone else's baby. That someone else is married and doesn't even know that she is pregnant. He will probably be furious when he finds out. Or will he maybe, just maybe, be pleased? Recently Ruth has been fantasising that the baby is a boy. Perhaps Nelson has always wanted a boy, will be delighted, will leave Michelle ... Hang on, though, does she even want him to leave Michelle? On balance, she doesn't. She would feel horribly guilty at breaking up the family and she is not sure if she ever wants to live with a man again. Especially a man as large as Nelson.
This is ridiculous anyway. Nelson doesn't love her and never has done. Their night together had been the result of a unique set of circumstances. They had just found the body of a dead child, Nelson had had to break the news to the family. For that one night it seemed as if Ruth and Nelson were alone in the world. Nelson had come to Ruth wanting comfort; the passion had surprised both of them. But Nelson has never, before or since, given any sign that he thinks of Ruth as anything other than a colleague, a fellow professional, perhaps even a friend. Why, then, is she thinking of him now, as Max takes her hand to help her over a stile? Does Max remind her of Nelson? He's a very different person; an academic, soft-spoken and courteous, but, physically, there is something. Like Nelson, Max has presence. It is not just that he is tall. It is more that, if he is in the room, you can't really look at anyone else. Phil faded into insignificance beside him and even Cathbad seemed several shades paler.
'Listen,' says Max suddenly, 'an owl.' They are passing the first hide. These wooden huts for birdwatchers are placed at strategic
Hence his presence here, guesses Ruth. A conciliatory gesture, appearing with Shona in front of this significantly insignificant group of people. She is sure that Phil would never accompany Shona to a departmental social or the Dean's lecture. Equally, she is sure he will never leave his wife. Just as Nelson will never leave his.
'Be careful,' is all she says.
'What do you mean?' Shona tosses her hair, which glows as brightly as one of the torches in the darkness.
'I've known Phil a long time. He says what he thinks you want to hear.'
Shona glares at her. Ruth is not sure what she would have said if Max hadn't come over, placing a hand on Ruth's arm. 'Do you want to make a move?' he says. 'It's getting a bit cold out here.'
Ruth agrees gratefully. With the disappearance of the sun, the night has got distinctly chilly. The wind is stronger too. Ruth pulls her jacket tightly around her but the Druids in their thin robes seem impervious to the cold. Their children too. As she and Max walk along the beach she can see them still playing in the near darkness. They have dug a deep hole and are chanting, 'Ding Dong Dell, Pussy's in the well.'
'Some things never change,' she says to Max as they make their way back to the path through the dunes. It is too dangerous to cross the Saltmarsh after dark; they must take the birdwatchers' trail, a raised shingle path that leads back to the car park. Max has left his car there. Ruth hopes he will give her a lift home and won't expect to come in for coffee.
'Interesting rhyme,' says Max in his tutorial voice. 'It's thought that Pussy refers to a prostitute.'
'What are they doing, drowning her?'
'Probably a version of a ducking stool.'
'How does it go? "Who put her in? Little Johnny Green".'
'"Who pulled her out? Little Jimmy Stout". Something like that.'
'Who was Jimmy then? Her pimp?'
Max laughs. 'I like you, Ruth,' he says.
There's no answer to that. 'I like you too' would sound impossibly arch. Changing the subject would sound like a snub. And she does like him. How much, she doesn't really want to consider. It's all so complicated, that's the problem. She is pregnant with someone else's baby. That someone else is married and doesn't even know that she is pregnant. He will probably be furious when he finds out. Or will he maybe, just maybe, be pleased? Recently Ruth has been fantasising that the baby is a boy. Perhaps Nelson has always wanted a boy, will be delighted, will leave Michelle ... Hang on, though, does she even want him to leave Michelle? On balance, she doesn't. She would feel horribly guilty at breaking up the family and she is not sure if she ever wants to live with a man again. Especially a man as large as Nelson.
This is ridiculous anyway. Nelson doesn't love her and never has done. Their night together had been the result of a unique set of circumstances. They had just found the body of a dead child, Nelson had had to break the news to the family. For that one night it seemed as if Ruth and Nelson were alone in the world. Nelson had come to Ruth wanting comfort; the passion had surprised both of them. But Nelson has never, before or since, given any sign that he thinks of Ruth as anything other than a colleague, a fellow professional, perhaps even a friend. Why, then, is she thinking of him now, as Max takes her hand to help her over a stile? Does Max remind her of Nelson? He's a very different person; an academic, soft-spoken and courteous, but, physically, there is something. Like Nelson, Max has presence. It is not just that he is tall. It is more that, if he is in the room, you can't really look at anyone else. Phil faded into insignificance beside him and even Cathbad seemed several shades paler.
'Listen,' says Max suddenly, 'an owl.' They are passing the first hide. These wooden huts for birdwatchers are placed at strategic
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