up. “Katterfelto?” The round spectacles
filled up with his boogling blue eyes. “Can it be — is it possible that you
mean Katterfelto’s Miracle Venereal Attraction Accelerator Apparatus?” He
spread his hand over his chest. “Has it reappeared?”
“I guess it works,” Griffy said. “Ms. Sacheverell owns it.”
His voice dropped. “This man is my
idol all my life. I have taken his name in his honor. Manchmal,” he said gutturally, “sometimes I think I am his Reinkarnation, you
would say, his soul repeated.”
Jewel couldn’t look away from the monitor. “Green. Is that
bad?”
He said, “Your symptoms. I must know everything. Let me
guess! At first euphoria, satisfaction at being the object of attention. Then,
perhaps, a little alarm, yes? Shyness? It is not so pleasant to be under so
much close observation.”
She shuddered. “It sucks.”
“I have studied original letter source material,” Kauz said,
nodding. “A delicately nurtured mädchen is unprepared for so much scrutiny. Perhaps she shrinks from the spotlight. One
must have, I think, the soul of a circus performer to enjoy it. Let me print
this reading—” he pressed a button and the image on the monitor froze. Then he
pleaded to Jewel, “Fraülein Hess, if I could work with you. Your test is
so remarkable. Your symptoms — if I could help in any way — I am familiar with
Katterfelto’s theories—”
“We ought to show him the Venus Machine, don’t you think?”
Griffy said to Sovay. “Do you mind? It’s your machine.”
Sovay rolled her eyes.
Kauz placed his hands together as if in prayer and bowed to
Sovay. “If I can examine the machine, perhaps I can find a way to cure this
unfortunate woman’s unbalanced aura. Madame, I beg you, be merciful.”
Sovay jerked her shoulder. “Oh, why not? And bring that
thing with you. I’m sure Virgil would love to see it,” she said, sending an
unpleasant look at Griffy.
“Of course,” Kauz said.
“I’m going out for some air.” Sovay slouched out of the
room, and Randy followed.
And bang, Jewel’s cases were as commingled as a
laundry-loadful of pantyhose. “I think I’ll, uh, visit the locker room.” She
blundered out past Kauz’s adoring gaze.
In the locker room she phoned Clay’s cell. “Listen,” she
hissed, “I’ve got the spa guy coming to Virgil’s house later this afternoon.
He’s in love with my green tones and he’s got a hard-on for the Venus Machine.
This is our chance to open him up.”
“Did he say anything about the election?”
“No. Not a word. Though I picked up a scary pamphlet about
magic in the waiting room. So, listen, what I want to know is, can you get
Virgil Thompson to invite him to stay for a few days?”
“What are you hoping to accomplish?” Clay said in a guarded
voice. “I thought you didn’t want to commingle the cases.”
“I didn’t, but now I’ve messed up here and they’re all
tangled together,” she confessed. “Will Virgil cooperate?”
“No problem. The guy’s got a hard-on for the Venus Machine,
and he has a bunch of money for his campaign fund, but he needs more. And
Virgil is rich and crazy about magic. Only question is, who’ll be gladder to
see whom.”
“Groovy. I need to hear him talking about his platform. Also
I hope to establish a link between him and Buzz. Buzz is distributing a
concoction for Kauz, I’m sure of it. Maybe he’ll have Buzz meet him at Virgil’s
house.”
“Surely Buzz will cooperate if charges can be laid against
him,” Clay said.
She sighed. “You don’t know Buzz.” The locker room door
opened. Sovay and Griffy came in. “I gotta go.” She hung up.
Clay seemed mighty sure of Kauz’s welcome. And very
interested in Kauz’s campaign money.
Great. She was unleashing one con artist on another. No,
three, she was forgetting Sovay the Snake. Was that ethical? Did she get to
bend the rules when she was undercover? How much? When would the whole thing
blow up in
filled up with his boogling blue eyes. “Can it be — is it possible that you
mean Katterfelto’s Miracle Venereal Attraction Accelerator Apparatus?” He
spread his hand over his chest. “Has it reappeared?”
“I guess it works,” Griffy said. “Ms. Sacheverell owns it.”
His voice dropped. “This man is my
idol all my life. I have taken his name in his honor. Manchmal,” he said gutturally, “sometimes I think I am his Reinkarnation, you
would say, his soul repeated.”
Jewel couldn’t look away from the monitor. “Green. Is that
bad?”
He said, “Your symptoms. I must know everything. Let me
guess! At first euphoria, satisfaction at being the object of attention. Then,
perhaps, a little alarm, yes? Shyness? It is not so pleasant to be under so
much close observation.”
She shuddered. “It sucks.”
“I have studied original letter source material,” Kauz said,
nodding. “A delicately nurtured mädchen is unprepared for so much scrutiny. Perhaps she shrinks from the spotlight. One
must have, I think, the soul of a circus performer to enjoy it. Let me print
this reading—” he pressed a button and the image on the monitor froze. Then he
pleaded to Jewel, “Fraülein Hess, if I could work with you. Your test is
so remarkable. Your symptoms — if I could help in any way — I am familiar with
Katterfelto’s theories—”
“We ought to show him the Venus Machine, don’t you think?”
Griffy said to Sovay. “Do you mind? It’s your machine.”
Sovay rolled her eyes.
Kauz placed his hands together as if in prayer and bowed to
Sovay. “If I can examine the machine, perhaps I can find a way to cure this
unfortunate woman’s unbalanced aura. Madame, I beg you, be merciful.”
Sovay jerked her shoulder. “Oh, why not? And bring that
thing with you. I’m sure Virgil would love to see it,” she said, sending an
unpleasant look at Griffy.
“Of course,” Kauz said.
“I’m going out for some air.” Sovay slouched out of the
room, and Randy followed.
And bang, Jewel’s cases were as commingled as a
laundry-loadful of pantyhose. “I think I’ll, uh, visit the locker room.” She
blundered out past Kauz’s adoring gaze.
In the locker room she phoned Clay’s cell. “Listen,” she
hissed, “I’ve got the spa guy coming to Virgil’s house later this afternoon.
He’s in love with my green tones and he’s got a hard-on for the Venus Machine.
This is our chance to open him up.”
“Did he say anything about the election?”
“No. Not a word. Though I picked up a scary pamphlet about
magic in the waiting room. So, listen, what I want to know is, can you get
Virgil Thompson to invite him to stay for a few days?”
“What are you hoping to accomplish?” Clay said in a guarded
voice. “I thought you didn’t want to commingle the cases.”
“I didn’t, but now I’ve messed up here and they’re all
tangled together,” she confessed. “Will Virgil cooperate?”
“No problem. The guy’s got a hard-on for the Venus Machine,
and he has a bunch of money for his campaign fund, but he needs more. And
Virgil is rich and crazy about magic. Only question is, who’ll be gladder to
see whom.”
“Groovy. I need to hear him talking about his platform. Also
I hope to establish a link between him and Buzz. Buzz is distributing a
concoction for Kauz, I’m sure of it. Maybe he’ll have Buzz meet him at Virgil’s
house.”
“Surely Buzz will cooperate if charges can be laid against
him,” Clay said.
She sighed. “You don’t know Buzz.” The locker room door
opened. Sovay and Griffy came in. “I gotta go.” She hung up.
Clay seemed mighty sure of Kauz’s welcome. And very
interested in Kauz’s campaign money.
Great. She was unleashing one con artist on another. No,
three, she was forgetting Sovay the Snake. Was that ethical? Did she get to
bend the rules when she was undercover? How much? When would the whole thing
blow up in
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