now.
"That kind of money would be a godsend for us," she murmured, staring down at the blueprints.
An icy ball formed in his stomach at her words.
“Us?” Did she have a child whose well-being she was risking with this lifestyle? He couldn’t be party to that. Or maybe “us” meant a husband…
Her gaze went shuttered and for a second, he was sure she was going to lie or stonewall him. But she surprised him by blowing out a long breath. "Me and my sister, Clarissa. She’s not well. From the time I can remember, we were taking her to the hospital or waiting for the ambulance to come. I was five when she was born. The day they brought her home, she wouldn't stop crying. I thought it was the worst sound I'd ever heard."
Her lips tipped into a little smile that was bittersweet and twisted him up in knots.
"I laid in bed and covered my head with a pillow, but that didn't work. So I made a little tent out of sheets in my closet and tried to sleep there, but that didn't work either. Finally, I got so mad, I climbed into her crib with her. Who knows what I was planning? Something horrible, probably, because I was a rotten kid.” She let out a hollow little laugh. “But then I looked at her face and she looked at me and something broke open inside of me. So I curled up next to her and patted her round little belly for a while, and eventually, she stopped."
Her eyes took on a faraway look and she paused for a long moment before she continued. "So strange, that cry. It was so strong, it seemed like she could bring the walls down if she wanted to. As summer turned to fall and fall to winter, that cry got weaker and weaker, and the fevers started. When she was two we got the definitive diagnosis. Leukemia. I lay awake at night for months, praying that I'd hear that cry again. Clarissa, wailing her heart out."
Her despair was so absolute, he wished like hell he knew what to say, what to do to ease her pain. Up until now, he’d known there was a chance, despite her tell, that every word Sadie had spoken had been a lie. But this? This, he had no doubt was the God’s honest truth and it made his stomach churn to witness her pain. She was so cautious, so necessarily secretive all the time, he was moved that she had chosen to share this with him.
"Sadie, I'm so sorry to hear of her suffering. It’s a terrible disease."
"It is. But she’s getting better. And we had some good years mixed in with the bad.” She swiped a hand over her eyes and sucked in a breath. “Then, after a bone marrow surgery and this last round of treatments, we saw some amazing results. She’s now cancer free and in recovery. But all that cost money we didn’t have, so…" She shrugged and pursed her lips.
So she stole things from bad people. He got that. Hell, if he’d been in her shoes, he’d have done it a thousand times over if he had to.
"What about medical insurance? Can they turn her away if-"
"My father never even graduated high school and my mother waited tables my whole life until she died. They made ends meet, but he was a handyman and when money was tight, he picked the least expensive plan. Her diagnosis came during one of those times. You can imagine how hard it would be to get a better insurance company to take a person on with a pre-existing condition that cost in the neighborhood of a hundred thousand dollars a year to manage. So my dad started picking up…night work.”
He could imagine exactly how that had gone. The idea of leaving a child to the mercy of an illness like that over money sickened him.
"It was enough to get by for a few years, until my mother was coming home one night after working a double shift at the restaurant. A drunk driver hit her head on and she was killed instantly. We did get some insurance money from the driver's policy, but Clarissa's health declined after my mother's death. The money was gone within a year. We were left with a choice. Work hard at school and hope Clarissa managed to hang on
"That kind of money would be a godsend for us," she murmured, staring down at the blueprints.
An icy ball formed in his stomach at her words.
“Us?” Did she have a child whose well-being she was risking with this lifestyle? He couldn’t be party to that. Or maybe “us” meant a husband…
Her gaze went shuttered and for a second, he was sure she was going to lie or stonewall him. But she surprised him by blowing out a long breath. "Me and my sister, Clarissa. She’s not well. From the time I can remember, we were taking her to the hospital or waiting for the ambulance to come. I was five when she was born. The day they brought her home, she wouldn't stop crying. I thought it was the worst sound I'd ever heard."
Her lips tipped into a little smile that was bittersweet and twisted him up in knots.
"I laid in bed and covered my head with a pillow, but that didn't work. So I made a little tent out of sheets in my closet and tried to sleep there, but that didn't work either. Finally, I got so mad, I climbed into her crib with her. Who knows what I was planning? Something horrible, probably, because I was a rotten kid.” She let out a hollow little laugh. “But then I looked at her face and she looked at me and something broke open inside of me. So I curled up next to her and patted her round little belly for a while, and eventually, she stopped."
Her eyes took on a faraway look and she paused for a long moment before she continued. "So strange, that cry. It was so strong, it seemed like she could bring the walls down if she wanted to. As summer turned to fall and fall to winter, that cry got weaker and weaker, and the fevers started. When she was two we got the definitive diagnosis. Leukemia. I lay awake at night for months, praying that I'd hear that cry again. Clarissa, wailing her heart out."
Her despair was so absolute, he wished like hell he knew what to say, what to do to ease her pain. Up until now, he’d known there was a chance, despite her tell, that every word Sadie had spoken had been a lie. But this? This, he had no doubt was the God’s honest truth and it made his stomach churn to witness her pain. She was so cautious, so necessarily secretive all the time, he was moved that she had chosen to share this with him.
"Sadie, I'm so sorry to hear of her suffering. It’s a terrible disease."
"It is. But she’s getting better. And we had some good years mixed in with the bad.” She swiped a hand over her eyes and sucked in a breath. “Then, after a bone marrow surgery and this last round of treatments, we saw some amazing results. She’s now cancer free and in recovery. But all that cost money we didn’t have, so…" She shrugged and pursed her lips.
So she stole things from bad people. He got that. Hell, if he’d been in her shoes, he’d have done it a thousand times over if he had to.
"What about medical insurance? Can they turn her away if-"
"My father never even graduated high school and my mother waited tables my whole life until she died. They made ends meet, but he was a handyman and when money was tight, he picked the least expensive plan. Her diagnosis came during one of those times. You can imagine how hard it would be to get a better insurance company to take a person on with a pre-existing condition that cost in the neighborhood of a hundred thousand dollars a year to manage. So my dad started picking up…night work.”
He could imagine exactly how that had gone. The idea of leaving a child to the mercy of an illness like that over money sickened him.
"It was enough to get by for a few years, until my mother was coming home one night after working a double shift at the restaurant. A drunk driver hit her head on and she was killed instantly. We did get some insurance money from the driver's policy, but Clarissa's health declined after my mother's death. The money was gone within a year. We were left with a choice. Work hard at school and hope Clarissa managed to hang on
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