The Exploits of Sherlock Holmes by John Dickson Carr, Adrian Conan Doyle Page A

sitting-room. Sherlock Holmes, putting away the violin and its bow, waited
    expectantly until Mrs. Gloria Cabpleasure entered the room.
    She was certainly handsome—tall, stately, of almost queenly bearing, though perhaps too
    haughty, with an abundance of rather brassy fair hair and cold, blue eyes. Clad in sables over a
    costly gown of dark-blue velvet, she wore a beige hat ornamented with a large white bird.
    Disdaining my offer to remove her outer coat, while Holmes performed introductions with
    easy courtesy, Mrs. Cabpleasure cast round one glance which seemed to sum up unfavourably
    our humble room, with its worn bearskin hearth-rug and acid-stained chemical table. Yet she
    consented to be seated in my arm-chair, clasping her white-gloved hands in her lap.
    "One moment, Mr. Holmes!" said she, politely, but in a hard, brisk voice. "Before I
    commit myself to anything, I must ask you to state the fee for your professional services."
    There was a slight pause before my friend answered.
    "My fees never vary, save when I remit them altogether."
    "Come, Mr. Holmes, I fear you think to take advantage of a poor weak woman! But in this
    case it will not do."
    "Indeed, madam?"
    "No, sir. Before I employ what you will forgive me for terming a professional spy, and
    risk being overcharged, I must again ask you to state your exact fee."
    Sherlock Holmes rose from his chair.
    "I am afraid, Mrs. Cabpleasure," said he, smiling, "that such small talents as I possess
    might be unavailing to assist you in your problem, and I regret exceedingly that you have
    been troubled by this call. Good-day, madam. Watson, will you kindly escort our guest
    downstairs?"
    "Stop!" cried Mrs. Cabpleasure, biting hard at her handsome lip.
    Holmes shrugged his shoulders and sank back again into the easy-chair.
    "You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Holmes. But it would be worth ten shillings or even a
    guinea to know why on earth my husband cherishes, worships, idolizes that pestilent shabby
    umbrella, and will never allow it away from his presence even at night!"
    Whatever Holmes might have felt, it was gone in his sense of starvation for a fresh problem.
    "Ah! Then your husband worships the umbrella in a literal sense?"
    "Did I not say so?"
    "No doubt the umbrella has some great financial or sentimental value?"
    "Stuff and nonsense! I was with him when he bought it two and a half years ago. He paid
    seven-and-six-pence for it at a shop in the Tottenham Court Road."
    "Yet perhaps some idiosyncrasy—?"
    Mrs. Gloria Cabpleasure looked shrewdly calculating.
    "No, Mr. Holmes. My husband is selfish, inhuman, and soulless. It is true, since my
    maternal great-grandfather was The McRea of McRea, in Aberdeenshire, I take good care
    to keep the man in his place. But Mr. Cabpleasure, aside from his vicious nature, has
    never done anything without very good reasons."
    Holmes looked grave.
    " 'Inhuman?' 'Vicious nature?' These are very serious terms indeed. Does he use you cruelly,
    then?" Our visitor raised even haughtier eyebrows. "No, but I have no doubt he would wish to
    do so. James is an abnormally strong brute, though he is only of middle height and has no
    more of what is called figure than a hop-pole. Pah, the vanity of men! His features are quite
    nondescript, but he is inordinately proud of a very heavy, very glossy brown moustache, which
    curves round his mouth like a horseshoe. He has worn it for years; and, indeed, next to that
    umbrella—"
    "Umbrella!"muttered Holmes. "Umbrella!Forgive the interruption, madam, but I should
    desire more details of your husband's nature."
    "It makes him look only like a police-constable."
    "I beg your pardon?"
    "The moustache, I mean."
    "But does your husband drink? Interest himself in other women? Gamble? Keep you short
    of money? What, none of these things?"
    "I presume, sir," retorted Mrs. Cabpleasure loftily, "that you are desirous of hearing
    merely the relevant facts? It is for you to provide an explanation. I wish to