of people seem to think he's in Mexico."
"Say the rest of it too, Mr. McGee."
"Such as?"
"He stole the money and ran. He took off with his Norwegian piece of ass to live happily ever after."
"He was having an affair with her. An architect, wasn't she?"
"Okay. So he was having an affair. His very first. Believe me, it was his first. It started last year.
In the summer. She was recommended to him. She was supposed to be some kind of an expert in the design of shopping centers. She did a big one in Atlanta and one in Jacksonville. When everything went to hell with the one he was supposed to build here, she should have taken off, right? But she stayed on, drawing pay from the big shot who was going broke. Oh, I am so goddamn sick of these little Scandinavian broads with their little breathy accents and no makeup, maybe a trace of lipstick and their pale green eyes and their big boobs and no more morals than rabbits. I don't mind telling you I was really really hurt. I couldn't believe it at first. Then when we had a nose-to-nose battle, he wouldn't deny it. Finally he confessed and promised he would break up with her, but he didn't. He claimed he tried, but he didn't try hard enough. I asked him if he gave a damn about Tracy and Lynn. It marks a child terribly when there is family trouble when they're in their mid-teens, just sixteen and fourteen. We had more rotten fights and then he Page 37
started sleeping out at the ranch, in a room back of the ranch office out there. That was in late January. I've had a chance to think lately. And I can ... almost begin to understand this Kristin business. Hub had a dream. He admired my daddy so much. What he wanted to do was build a base. Money and power. And then one day he was going to run for governor and become somebody in Florida. But last year, when times were hard and things began to go bad, he could see his dream fading. He had been too confident. He'd made a bad judgment of the situation. It was going to spoil his track record to be brought down after forty. And there wouldn't be enough time to build it all up again. He, was really seriously upset. He always had such great drive and spirit, and he couldn't find a way out of the spot he was in. Some men would go a little crazy. Some would take to the bottle or go onto Valium. Hub took up with that architect person, proving his manhood, I guess. Maybe she kept telling him he was a great man. Maybe I should have done that so she wouldn't have to. Maybe I nagged him some. And maybe it was Hub's way of going a little bit crazy. Am I making any sense?"
"I think you are."
"You really listen, don't you?"
"I'm interested."
"You have been sitting there, looking right at me, and nodding and making little sounds in your throat. You are so damned earnest about listening to me, you made me rattle on and on and on."
"You wanted to talk about it. That's all."
"So I open up to you and I don't even know you."
"That's the easiest way of all, when you don't know the other person."
"Maybe."
"What makes you so sure he's dead?"
"We were always very close. Very close, until the last eight months of his life. We were in touch with each other on some kind of level most people don't have. Once I had a feeling of blackness, of terrible fear. He'd gone hunting with John Tuckerman. I wrote down the exact time it happened. I couldn't get in touch with him. I was beside myself with worry. Finally he phoned me from Waycross, Georgia, and said he'd been bitten on the wrist by a big cottonmouth, but he'd been treated and it was going to be okay and he would be home in two days. When we compared my note with the time he had been bitten, it was correct to the very minute. He knew the time because it had bitten him on the left wrist, near where his wristwatch was. Once when the girls were both in school, in the first and third grades, he came charging home in the middle of the afternoon, convinced something was wrong. I'd fallen from the shed roof and
"Say the rest of it too, Mr. McGee."
"Such as?"
"He stole the money and ran. He took off with his Norwegian piece of ass to live happily ever after."
"He was having an affair with her. An architect, wasn't she?"
"Okay. So he was having an affair. His very first. Believe me, it was his first. It started last year.
In the summer. She was recommended to him. She was supposed to be some kind of an expert in the design of shopping centers. She did a big one in Atlanta and one in Jacksonville. When everything went to hell with the one he was supposed to build here, she should have taken off, right? But she stayed on, drawing pay from the big shot who was going broke. Oh, I am so goddamn sick of these little Scandinavian broads with their little breathy accents and no makeup, maybe a trace of lipstick and their pale green eyes and their big boobs and no more morals than rabbits. I don't mind telling you I was really really hurt. I couldn't believe it at first. Then when we had a nose-to-nose battle, he wouldn't deny it. Finally he confessed and promised he would break up with her, but he didn't. He claimed he tried, but he didn't try hard enough. I asked him if he gave a damn about Tracy and Lynn. It marks a child terribly when there is family trouble when they're in their mid-teens, just sixteen and fourteen. We had more rotten fights and then he Page 37
started sleeping out at the ranch, in a room back of the ranch office out there. That was in late January. I've had a chance to think lately. And I can ... almost begin to understand this Kristin business. Hub had a dream. He admired my daddy so much. What he wanted to do was build a base. Money and power. And then one day he was going to run for governor and become somebody in Florida. But last year, when times were hard and things began to go bad, he could see his dream fading. He had been too confident. He'd made a bad judgment of the situation. It was going to spoil his track record to be brought down after forty. And there wouldn't be enough time to build it all up again. He, was really seriously upset. He always had such great drive and spirit, and he couldn't find a way out of the spot he was in. Some men would go a little crazy. Some would take to the bottle or go onto Valium. Hub took up with that architect person, proving his manhood, I guess. Maybe she kept telling him he was a great man. Maybe I should have done that so she wouldn't have to. Maybe I nagged him some. And maybe it was Hub's way of going a little bit crazy. Am I making any sense?"
"I think you are."
"You really listen, don't you?"
"I'm interested."
"You have been sitting there, looking right at me, and nodding and making little sounds in your throat. You are so damned earnest about listening to me, you made me rattle on and on and on."
"You wanted to talk about it. That's all."
"So I open up to you and I don't even know you."
"That's the easiest way of all, when you don't know the other person."
"Maybe."
"What makes you so sure he's dead?"
"We were always very close. Very close, until the last eight months of his life. We were in touch with each other on some kind of level most people don't have. Once I had a feeling of blackness, of terrible fear. He'd gone hunting with John Tuckerman. I wrote down the exact time it happened. I couldn't get in touch with him. I was beside myself with worry. Finally he phoned me from Waycross, Georgia, and said he'd been bitten on the wrist by a big cottonmouth, but he'd been treated and it was going to be okay and he would be home in two days. When we compared my note with the time he had been bitten, it was correct to the very minute. He knew the time because it had bitten him on the left wrist, near where his wristwatch was. Once when the girls were both in school, in the first and third grades, he came charging home in the middle of the afternoon, convinced something was wrong. I'd fallen from the shed roof and
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