Besides, a good wife is not supposed to question her husband.â
âWe long ago established that Iâm not always a good wife.â She swirled her wine, inhaled again, set the glass aside. If he had to guess, heâd say she missed wine, but he had to admire her strength in not indulging. Her gaze came back to him and he felt it like a punch. âYou didnât marry me simply to gain an heir. You love me.â
Was that doubt in her voice? He didnât love her, but he wasnât going to lie to her either. âEvery Earl of Greyling married for love.â
Her brow furrowed. âHow do you know that?â
âMarsden told us.â
âHow did it even come up?â Skepticism laced her voice.
âWhen our parents died, we lost a good bit of our history. Thatâs something one doesnât really consider, how much one learns through stories shared. It bothered Edward, the things we didnât know. How did our parents meet? What was Father like as a student? Every night before we went to bed, Edward would insist that we share something our parents had told us and he would write it into a journal. When we ran out of stories, he began to ask Marsden to share what he knew. I think thatâs why Edward enjoyed weaving elaborate tales. He didnât like the idea of history not being passed on. He probably would have made a passable minstrel.â
âWhat became of the journal?â
He shook his head. âI donât know. I havenât thought about it in years.â
âMaybe youâll find it when you begin going through Edwardâs things.â
Not likely. Heâd given it to Albert for safekeeping, to be passed on to his heir. Maybe when he went through Albertâs things. âPerhaps.â
âSpeaking of Edwardâs things . . . I would be happyâÂno, happy is not the correct word. I wish it didnât have to be done, but I could sort through Edwardâs belongings, spare you the sadness of it.â
It was an odd thing to realize how involved she was, how conscientious she was of lightening his burden. Her husbandâs burden. He couldnât forget who she was truly assisting or thought she was. Still, of all the women Edward had been with over the years, not one had ever seemed to care about any burden he might carry. They were only interested in what being with him might gain them. Even if circumstances were different, he wouldnât have known how to accept her generous offer, but he did know it wasnât Edwardâs possessions that needed going through. He also knew that eventually she would be the one to go through things. Perhaps they would go through them together.
If she didnât hate him with every breath she took.
âI appreciate the offer but Iâll see to the task.â
âWhat about his residence in London? I suspect youâll want to get his possessions out of there as soon as possible.â
âI donât see the need to rush.â
âBut youâre shelling out money on a lease thatâs no longer needed.â
âI can well afford it.â The words came out too tart. He softened his voice. âI have no desire to leave you alone until after the babe is born. And you certainly have no business traveling to London.â
âYou could send word to the servants to simply pack up his thingsâÂâ
âNo!â He still needed his own London residence, as he intended for her and the child to live in the dwellings that belonged to the earl. âItâs a matter that can wait. As Iâm finished with dinner, if youâll excuse meâÂâ
Her hand came to rest over his, causing the rest of his words to back up in his throat.
âIâm sorry. I donât mean to push. I know going through his belongings will only bring home that he is truly gone. Youâll take care of it when youâre ready to face it.â
âWhen
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