Eugene kept time with the second hand. Looked like he made it back all right , I thought, when I realized that most of the patients were still asleep and I jumped out of bed to open my closet. I pulled out my shorts, shirt, and underwear, grabbed a towel from the brass hook by the sink, and ran out the door.
I quietly opened the shower room door and listened to hear if anyone was inside. To my relief, the only noise that echoed in the room was the squeak of the door. I walked in and noticed wet towels and a large puddle of water in front of one of the shower stalls. So, I grabbed one of the black plastic chairs by the window, slid it over to the nearest shower, started to take off my clothes, and immediately jumped in and turned on the water. It was better than a cup of coffee, as the cold water jolted me alert and pushed me back against the tile wall at the same time I turned the handle to hot.
I understood I couldn’t be late for the doctor’s visit, and quickly washed and opened the curtain, when I noticed again the bacteria-ridden mess of wet tiles and water on the floor. I toweled off and got dressed in the shower. I was almost done, when I realized that I couldn’t find my shoes. Frantically, I looked in the shower and on the chair, but to my dismay, they were nowhere to be found; they were still by the side of my bed. I looked around and decided to use my towel as socks and shimmy across the tile to the door. If anyone would have seen me, they would sure question my behavior , I thought. But to my relief, no one came.
The doctor was only a few rooms away as I darted down the hall and into my room, where Barry Eugene still lay fast asleep. I threw my pajamas and towel into the bottom of the closet and ran back to the sink to brush my teeth. Nervous, I started to feel cold, so I took a deep breath and stared at myself in the mirror. I will get out of detox today , I thought. Confidently, I strolled back, sat at the side of my bed, and patiently waited for the arrival of the doctor.
As I looked out the window, I was aware of a quiet stirring behind me from Barry Eugene. The colors from the leaves were vibrant, something to which I had never given much attention. Long overdue, I became one with the silence that was outside. There were brief glimpses of my life before the damage I had caused to myself and others, and even the present situation and the unforeseen future. But I fought against those thoughts and focused on the calm of the image before me, for it might be a while before I felt it again.
“Matt. The doctor will be in in a few minutes,” Karen said as she tapped on the door.
I nodded my head as she walked over, and stared at Barry Eugene asleep.
“Matt,” she said as she looked back over her shoulder. “You can’t talk like that to Barry Eugene anymore. He went to Carl last night and complained that you wanted to sleep with him. He was screaming about how he hated homosexuals and if they come onto him he’d kill them. It took Carl and two of us just to get him to go back into the room to go to sleep.”
“He went to Carl?” I said as I grinned. “Now that, I wish I could have seen.”
“It’s not funny…” she said as the doctor interrupted her.
“Matt H. So how are we doing today?” he said as Karen stepped aside.
“Feelin’ pretty good,” I said.
“How is your appetite?”
“A lot better than before.”
“Well, hold out your arms,” he said as he gently placed my hands in the palm of his hand.
No, no, no, no, no, I mouthed the words.
He released my hands and wrote on his clipboard.
“Well, you’re still shaking, but it’s not as detrimental as before.” He took a deep breath. “So you can be released from detox.”
My shoulders dropped as I released the stress from my body. Finally, I could get out of this crazy floor and go up to where the normal patients were , I thought.
“Well, you’re still going to have to take the medication for your symptoms, but I see
I quietly opened the shower room door and listened to hear if anyone was inside. To my relief, the only noise that echoed in the room was the squeak of the door. I walked in and noticed wet towels and a large puddle of water in front of one of the shower stalls. So, I grabbed one of the black plastic chairs by the window, slid it over to the nearest shower, started to take off my clothes, and immediately jumped in and turned on the water. It was better than a cup of coffee, as the cold water jolted me alert and pushed me back against the tile wall at the same time I turned the handle to hot.
I understood I couldn’t be late for the doctor’s visit, and quickly washed and opened the curtain, when I noticed again the bacteria-ridden mess of wet tiles and water on the floor. I toweled off and got dressed in the shower. I was almost done, when I realized that I couldn’t find my shoes. Frantically, I looked in the shower and on the chair, but to my dismay, they were nowhere to be found; they were still by the side of my bed. I looked around and decided to use my towel as socks and shimmy across the tile to the door. If anyone would have seen me, they would sure question my behavior , I thought. But to my relief, no one came.
The doctor was only a few rooms away as I darted down the hall and into my room, where Barry Eugene still lay fast asleep. I threw my pajamas and towel into the bottom of the closet and ran back to the sink to brush my teeth. Nervous, I started to feel cold, so I took a deep breath and stared at myself in the mirror. I will get out of detox today , I thought. Confidently, I strolled back, sat at the side of my bed, and patiently waited for the arrival of the doctor.
As I looked out the window, I was aware of a quiet stirring behind me from Barry Eugene. The colors from the leaves were vibrant, something to which I had never given much attention. Long overdue, I became one with the silence that was outside. There were brief glimpses of my life before the damage I had caused to myself and others, and even the present situation and the unforeseen future. But I fought against those thoughts and focused on the calm of the image before me, for it might be a while before I felt it again.
“Matt. The doctor will be in in a few minutes,” Karen said as she tapped on the door.
I nodded my head as she walked over, and stared at Barry Eugene asleep.
“Matt,” she said as she looked back over her shoulder. “You can’t talk like that to Barry Eugene anymore. He went to Carl last night and complained that you wanted to sleep with him. He was screaming about how he hated homosexuals and if they come onto him he’d kill them. It took Carl and two of us just to get him to go back into the room to go to sleep.”
“He went to Carl?” I said as I grinned. “Now that, I wish I could have seen.”
“It’s not funny…” she said as the doctor interrupted her.
“Matt H. So how are we doing today?” he said as Karen stepped aside.
“Feelin’ pretty good,” I said.
“How is your appetite?”
“A lot better than before.”
“Well, hold out your arms,” he said as he gently placed my hands in the palm of his hand.
No, no, no, no, no, I mouthed the words.
He released my hands and wrote on his clipboard.
“Well, you’re still shaking, but it’s not as detrimental as before.” He took a deep breath. “So you can be released from detox.”
My shoulders dropped as I released the stress from my body. Finally, I could get out of this crazy floor and go up to where the normal patients were , I thought.
“Well, you’re still going to have to take the medication for your symptoms, but I see
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