The Diary by Eileen Goudge Page A

unleashing the welter of emotions bubbling up inside her.
    She kept a firm grip on the steering wheel, her eyes fixed just as firmly on the road ahead. Yet she had never been more aware of another human being. When she sneaked a glance at AJ out of the corner of her eye, she caught him regarding her with a bemused look, a corner of his mouth hitched up in a wry smile as if he knew precisely what was on her mind.
    â€œStop that,” she ordered, feeling herself blush.
    â€œStop what?”
    â€œStop looking at me like that.”
    He feigned innocence. “How am I supposed to look at you?”
    â€œYou know what I mean. People will get the wrong idea.”
    He laughed. “What people? There’s no one else around.”
    â€œI meant if there were. We wouldn’t want them … thinking things.”
    â€œWhy not? I have nothing to hide.” He cranked his window all the way down, letting in a rush of warm air. The sun had dipped below the horizon, and brushstrokes of magenta, gold, and scarlet stood out against the darkening sky. Amid the gathering shadows, the rows of corn stretching for miles on either side were knitted into a vast, unbroken sea with no distant hills to stem its tides.
    â€œYou might not, but I do,” she reminded him.
    His mouth twitched in barely contained amusement. “Ah. I take it you mean your fiancé. So it’s not enough that we’re sparing him any gossip from us being spotted together in a public place? Now we have to worry about any spies who might be lurking among the cornstalks?”
    â€œHe’s not my fiancé.” The words slipped out. She’d intended to set him straight on that matter, but not until she’d made it clear to him, in as gentle a fashion as possible, that he shouldn’t get his hopes up just because she and Bob weren’t officially engaged. Now she regretted not only her lousy timing but having been stupid enough to mislead him in the first place. It must be obvious to AJ that she wouldn’t have trusted herself with him had she not been “betrothed.”
    But he’d clearly misunderstood because he asked in surprise, “You told him about us?”
    â€œNo, of course not. We were never engaged in the first place.”
    â€œSo why did you tell me you were?”
    â€œI don’t know.”
    â€œI think I do.” She caught a flash of anger in AJ’s eyes. “Wouldn’t want some juvenile delinquent putting the moves on you. Lord knows where it could lead. And you with your sainted reputation to think of.” Once again he’d misread her intentions. Or, in this case, put the worst face on them.
    â€œIt wasn’t like that.” Elizabeth was clenching the steering wheel so tightly that her knuckles had gone white. She was angry at herself for bungling things so badly, and it made her lash out at him. “Anyway, it’s not as if you didn’t know about Bob and me.”
    But what was there to know? Could she honestly say she felt the same about Bob as she had a few short weeks ago? She’d been attempting to rationalize her growing disenchantment by telling herself it was only natural, when a couple had been together as long as they had, for the excitement of the first months to settle into something more sedate. But was that really the case? What if this thing with AJ weren’t some form of temporary madness but merely her heart speaking the truth?
    â€œPull over,” he ordered.
    â€œWhere?” There was nothing but cornfields as far as the eye could see.
    â€œThere’s a spot up ahead.” He pointed to where the shoulder widened in a graveled turnabout.
    As soon as she brought the car to a stop, he reached over and switched off the ignition. For a long moment neither of them spoke; there was just the ticking of the engine as it cooled and the sound of crickets taking up their nightly chorus. At last he climbed out, and she followed