and walks over to where I’m sitting. “Did Leila finish reading the bedtime story?”
“I hate that book.” He frowns, crossing his arms to emphasize his anger.
“Okay. You can stay out here with me. Do you want me to read you something else?”
A quick shake of his head is all I get. I ask him a few more questions, but he sits beside me, refusing to talk. The familiar tightening takes hold of my chest. How can I reach him and show him I’m here, no matter what?
An idea pops into my head. Hoping it works, I retrieve my laptop and ask, “Shane, have you watched any of the concerts you played in?”
He looks up at me and shakes his head slowly.
“Would you like to? You did such a great job.”
He shrugs, giving me a glimmer of hope this may work.
I boot up the footage of his performances, stealing sideways glances as I do. He leans forward slightly, waiting for the video to start. Once it does, his eyes widen and his mouth gapes open adorably. He watches the entire thing, barely blinking as he does. When the video ends, he looks up at me and asks, “Can you play that again?”
“Absolutely, dude.” I start it from the beginning. A few seconds in he points to the screen, “That’s called a riff.”
“Really? How do you know that?”
“Trey told me,” he responds without looking away from the video of him and his idol jamming on stage.
Leila joins us during viewing number four. She leans against the doorway, watching in awe. Each time he watches, he gives me another fun fact, or a thought that ran through his head at the time he was on stage. He’s chattering away, saying more than he has in days. Music is what brought him to us. Music is what will bring him back.
Leila stands rooted, unable to move. It’s almost as if she’s afraid to ruin the moment or stop him from being Shane. When the video ends again, he finally tears his eyes away from the laptop.
“I really am good,” he admits arrogantly.
“I told you, dude. You’re really good. When you get older, you’re going to be one of the best bass players I’ve ever seen.”
“I know,” he nods, agreeing wholeheartedly.
“Hey, Shane. I don’t think Leila has watched this yet. Do you mind if we show her?”
He glances at my wife, “Leila, you have to see this. It’s so cool.”
She smiles wide, “Of course, I absolutely have to see it!” She sits beside Shane, and he leans into her subconsciously. She gently wraps an arm around him, looking over at me with the same wide smile. I throw her a wink, a confirmation that he’ll be okay. With time, he’ll be okay.
Hunter
The rest of our European tour went by in a blur. After our week in England, we hopped across Sweden, Germany, and ended in Greece. We quickly slid back into our normal routine. The only disruption came when Leila refused to hang out at night, fearing Shane would need her if she weren’t there. Most of the time Jack stayed with her as well. Occasionally she forced him to come out with us to try and have a good time. He’d mope anyway, making us all wonder why he bothered.
“It’s easier not to argue with her,” he responded, sounding completely resigned to comply with her recent demands. “He woke having a bad dream when we all went out in Stockholm. She can’t forgive herself.”
“You need to give her time,” Patti said and then added, “you can’t blame her for wanting to be there for him, no matter what he needs.”
“I do, too, but it’s not realistic.” Jack looked exhausted. I had only seen my friend looking this bad one other time. When Leila was having complications carrying the twins, he was at his wits end trying to help her. Just like now, he wanted to make it better and couldn’t do that for her. It drove him mad.
Patti had reached for his hand, trying to comfort him with even that tiny gesture. “She’s got to do this to get through, Jack. She’ll find a way to balance it all. Right now she knows you and the twins are okay,
“I hate that book.” He frowns, crossing his arms to emphasize his anger.
“Okay. You can stay out here with me. Do you want me to read you something else?”
A quick shake of his head is all I get. I ask him a few more questions, but he sits beside me, refusing to talk. The familiar tightening takes hold of my chest. How can I reach him and show him I’m here, no matter what?
An idea pops into my head. Hoping it works, I retrieve my laptop and ask, “Shane, have you watched any of the concerts you played in?”
He looks up at me and shakes his head slowly.
“Would you like to? You did such a great job.”
He shrugs, giving me a glimmer of hope this may work.
I boot up the footage of his performances, stealing sideways glances as I do. He leans forward slightly, waiting for the video to start. Once it does, his eyes widen and his mouth gapes open adorably. He watches the entire thing, barely blinking as he does. When the video ends, he looks up at me and asks, “Can you play that again?”
“Absolutely, dude.” I start it from the beginning. A few seconds in he points to the screen, “That’s called a riff.”
“Really? How do you know that?”
“Trey told me,” he responds without looking away from the video of him and his idol jamming on stage.
Leila joins us during viewing number four. She leans against the doorway, watching in awe. Each time he watches, he gives me another fun fact, or a thought that ran through his head at the time he was on stage. He’s chattering away, saying more than he has in days. Music is what brought him to us. Music is what will bring him back.
Leila stands rooted, unable to move. It’s almost as if she’s afraid to ruin the moment or stop him from being Shane. When the video ends again, he finally tears his eyes away from the laptop.
“I really am good,” he admits arrogantly.
“I told you, dude. You’re really good. When you get older, you’re going to be one of the best bass players I’ve ever seen.”
“I know,” he nods, agreeing wholeheartedly.
“Hey, Shane. I don’t think Leila has watched this yet. Do you mind if we show her?”
He glances at my wife, “Leila, you have to see this. It’s so cool.”
She smiles wide, “Of course, I absolutely have to see it!” She sits beside Shane, and he leans into her subconsciously. She gently wraps an arm around him, looking over at me with the same wide smile. I throw her a wink, a confirmation that he’ll be okay. With time, he’ll be okay.
Hunter
The rest of our European tour went by in a blur. After our week in England, we hopped across Sweden, Germany, and ended in Greece. We quickly slid back into our normal routine. The only disruption came when Leila refused to hang out at night, fearing Shane would need her if she weren’t there. Most of the time Jack stayed with her as well. Occasionally she forced him to come out with us to try and have a good time. He’d mope anyway, making us all wonder why he bothered.
“It’s easier not to argue with her,” he responded, sounding completely resigned to comply with her recent demands. “He woke having a bad dream when we all went out in Stockholm. She can’t forgive herself.”
“You need to give her time,” Patti said and then added, “you can’t blame her for wanting to be there for him, no matter what he needs.”
“I do, too, but it’s not realistic.” Jack looked exhausted. I had only seen my friend looking this bad one other time. When Leila was having complications carrying the twins, he was at his wits end trying to help her. Just like now, he wanted to make it better and couldn’t do that for her. It drove him mad.
Patti had reached for his hand, trying to comfort him with even that tiny gesture. “She’s got to do this to get through, Jack. She’ll find a way to balance it all. Right now she knows you and the twins are okay,
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